Ian is really having a tough time over here

[The Molinas 0]

How about a little trip to Newark/NJ... I got my SSN without any problems...

Edited January 20, 2007 by The Molinas

[sophyie 0]

If somebody culd explain to me how the bus lines work.... my husband, his friends and his whole fam. aint got no clue since they never take the bus....

Usually it's really simple to find out all about that (also how the system works) online (including trip planner and things like that).

Or find out if there's a place somewhere close to where you live where you can buy bus tickets, usually the people who work there are happy to help...

Try it- it helps a LOT to be able to move around.

[~*Dorothy*~ 2]

If somebody culd explain to me how the bus lines work.... my husband, his friends and his whole fam. aint got no clue since they never take the bus....

Forget about bus - hop on the Path and you are in Manhattan in no time...

[lak&ajm 0]

Hello everyone. I know it has been a while since I have been on and I do apologise. I have been working as a manager at Wendy's and Ian is ...well...still waiting to hear back about his EAD. I really don't know what to do for him at this point as he is really unhappy folks. He doesn't like New York state as a whole and has finally learned that yes, it is expensive to live here in NY, and now wants me to move out of state. I am all for it apart from one fact. My children are here. He is really getting bored at not being able to work yet and I have suddenly discovered how little patience he has. I remind him of how hard it was for me to wait patiently when I was over in the UK with him for 18 months and had to wait 7 months for his K-3 to go through so I could see my children again. We have filed his AOS and started all that in December. I know most of you are going to laugh and say "are you kidding me? DECEMBER AND HES MOANING!!!", I ask that you keep in mind that Ian is a worker and always has been. He hates sitting around doing nothing. I have given him suggestions of things to do whilst I am at work, but even that gets to be old. He is now contemplating going back to the UK to wait out his work card then will come back. I don't agree with that choice, but all I want is for him to be happy and if that is what will help, then I guess I have nothing else to say but to let him go. I personally feel that it would be a waste of money because the EAD card comes sooner than he realises. We did get an RFE for the I-485 in regards to the finances, but at the time of filing, I wasn't working. I know have a job that pays more than the required amount and I have sent in the response for that about two weeks ago give or take a few days. Can anyone tell me, approximately how long does it take for the EAD??? Ian is very upset because here in NY, you can't even get a state ID card without a social security number which you can't get until you have your EAD card.

Can anyone out there please give me some advice??? I love this man with all my heart and it is tearing me apart to see him so unhappy. The arguments have not been pretty to say the least.

Thanks in advance

LJ

I am not sure that this is a possibility. I was under the impression that international travel was not permitted unless AP was applied for and issued. Am I correct here? I would sure to have him go back and then not be allowed to come back to the States due to the fact he cannot handle being "idle" while waiting for his EAD. I agree with others - try and find some volunteer work. While not receiving any pay it can be very rewarding in many other ways.

Lori

[ceriserose 1]

He is now contemplating going back to the UK to wait out his work card then will come back. I don't agree with that choice, but all I want is for him to be happy and if that is what will help, then I guess I have nothing else to say but to let him go. I personally feel that it would be a waste of money because the EAD card comes sooner than he realises.

LJ

I am not sure that this is a possibility. I was under the impression that international travel was not permitted unless AP was applied for and issued. Am I correct here? I would sure to have him go back and then not be allowed to come back to the States due to the fact he cannot handle being "idle" while waiting for his EAD. I agree with others - try and find some volunteer work. While not receiving any pay it can be very rewarding in many other ways.

Lori

According to the OP's profile, Ian came on a K3 which is a multple-entry visa. No AP required like it is for a K1, which is a single-entry visa.

[lak&ajm 0]

He is now contemplating going back to the UK to wait out his work card then will come back. I don't agree with that choice, but all I want is for him to be happy and if that is what will help, then I guess I have nothing else to say but to let him go. I personally feel that it would be a waste of money because the EAD card comes sooner than he realises.

LJ

I am not sure that this is a possibility. I was under the impression that international travel was not permitted unless AP was applied for and issued. Am I correct here? I would sure to have him go back and then not be allowed to come back to the States due to the fact he cannot handle being "idle" while waiting for his EAD. I agree with others - try and find some volunteer work. While not receiving any pay it can be very rewarding in many other ways.

Lori

According to the OP's profile, Ian came on a K3 which is a multple-entry visa. No AP required like it is for a K1, which is a single-entry visa.

Thanks for the clarification. As you can tell we are doing a K1 and I know that is not allowed until receiving the AP.

Thanks again. I learned something new!

Lori

[Killer_Clown_2009 0]

If it is causing huge arguments, I'd say tell him to go back to England.

[Ban Hammer 13,352]

If it is causing huge arguments, I'd say tell him to go back to England.

[LaL 418]

If it is causing huge arguments, I'd say tell him to go back to England.

tough love chuckie, tough love!

[Ban Hammer 13,352]

If it is causing huge arguments, I'd say tell him to go back to England.

tough love chuckie, tough love!

right.

[LaL 418]

If it is causing huge arguments, I'd say tell him to go back to England.

tough love chuckie, tough love!

right.

[Peikko 1,575]

meetup.com

Every type of group from ex pats to fitness groups. If he's a social person, and not working, he's probably missing mates. Get him to join a few groups and get some new friends and he should begin to feel more as though he 'belongs'

Agreed with the volunteering bit too

[LaL 418]

did he have different expectations when coming here? i dont know, throwing out empty threats is a crappy way to make someone feel guilty. go with the suggestion of volunteering or a get started on WOW. He has a couple of months before he gets his EAD. I hope you can both relax.

[luvaLimey 0]

That was my biggest worry for my fiance when he got here too, and his. He knows sitting around staring at the walls starts driving him crazy after about two days of it. Honestly, it does that to me too, so I can completely commiserate.

That's one of the reasons we're going to try for the CR-1 while I'm over there in England with him (yes, I know we can't DCF; I'm going to use my parent's mailing address, and they'll send me anything from USCIS): so he can be eligible to work right when we get back.

People's suggestions that he try volunteering are really good. Try registering at http://www.volunteermatch.org/

They match people's interests and abilities up with various volunteer positions in your area. Not only will it give him a reason to leave the house, but he'll be able to get out and meet new people, and start networking. Who knows, maybe once he's got his EAD, someone he met through volunteer work would know of a job he could do. It really is who you know.

As for hating where you're at; my fiance hates where I live now. He's been up and down the east coast, and we've travelled the southwest together, and he's said this area is the most unfriendly area he's been in over here in the US. We're not going to move back here when we come back to the states. I know how hard it is to move and leave your kids: I'm leaving mine for a year, and when we come back here together, we might not live in the same state (really hoping their Dad - who hates it here too - moves to Cali while I'm gone).

Whatever you two decide, he does need a reason to get out of the house. I found it suffocating to stay home with my kids once they were born, and again after being laid off. I was busy... but bored stupid. I can't stand not having a job, or at least something to get me out and gone.

Edited January 20, 2007 by luvaLimey

[matako 0]

Let him go. If thats what he wants to do, let him do it. He is grown. If he is becoming a jacka## over something like this, what if you get sick or had a serious problem, is this how he would behave? Run back to the UK? Come on!

This is a no brainer! He is trying to get control of your mind slowly by slowly..he has symptoms of a verbal abuser, if you ask me....oh, he is from the UK, I rememeber.

Edited January 20, 2007 by matako