How much does your US spouse/fiance help you with your immigration processes?

[ChuckM 8]

I am the US Sponsor, I did the research, and told my then fiance what needed she needed to do. She provided me with all of her details and I filled out all forms and she would sign them, send them back to be and I verified everything and mailed them. The point being, I wanted my fiancee here so I could get married to her. She wanted to come here and get married to me. Both of us needed to do things, pay for things, all to prepare for our future together. The US spouse should understand that this journey is not the responsibility of the beneficiary. Once the beneficiary is here, the work does not stop either.

[alix 20]

Hi Annie,

My husband and I have been married 9 years now. He barely helped me with anything during any of my immigration journey. I had to gather all the documents myself, unless it was something I had no access to. And of course to sign forms, etc.

When we did the CR-1 I made a few mistakes due to lack of knowledge of the process (and before finding VJ) and after I was almost deported, he finally agreed to consult with an immigration lawyer and help out a little bit. He also came to the interview, but only because the lawyer recommended it (and we hadn't seen each other in 4 months!).

When I did my ROC he only helped when I got an RFE and asked him for help. He wrote the cover letter for the additional documents, which I had to collect.

Now for my citizenship he only printed a couple of bank statements for me. But didn't offer to help review the form or anything. I did all on my own.

Do I wish he was more involved and helpful? ABSOLUTELY! Am I divorcing him because of that? Of course not. His lack of interest does bother me a little bit but it's not a deal breaker. Hang in there!

Edited July 17, 2014 by alix

[*HappyInlove* 6]

During our K3 process my husband did the research and started the petition with hiring a lawyer but it ended up he redid some of the forms because he noticed the mistakes the lawyer did. I did my part by gathering the necessary documents and signing papers for my part. I helped him but he did the majority of it..And when I got here in the US for our AOS, ROC, and N-400 we both help each other. I never heard him complain. He supported me with everything, taking me to the civil surgeon, applying for my driver's license, biometrics, interviews etc..Due to that, we never receive any RFE from start to finish. I understand you and it's really frustrating if you're the only one doing the work. It's really nice that both of you work as a team as this process can sometimes be stressful. I wish he should just be supportive and not yell at you..

[Danilu 11]

I did all the research (I´m the PR) from the beginning (VJ helped me a lot!). Starting from K-1 visa, I assembled the packet and sent it to my husband so that he could add the I-129 F and G-325 A plus his photo and 2 other documents he had. I e-mailed him the forms so that he printed them. For the interview, he sent me the paperwork and the signedI-134 that I had previously filled out with the information he provided me.

Regarding AOS and ROC, I assembled the packets and he only signed where was required.

[Dualie 185]

My husband is on the road for his job ALOT, so I have done the lion's share of the research and the organization of the forms and documents we have filed. He is the one who is footing the bill so I don't mind doing this for him. He has already gotten his tax transcripts and work related documents ready for if we ever get to NVC...lol . He also wants to accompany me to Montreal for the interview, so I am happy with our team effort.

[Thane 8]

As we just went through through the K-1 process and my wife and I both worked together on getting everything completed. Our skype sessions generally were reviews of the paperwork that I completed and to go over items for the g-325a and the overall packet in general. My wife went around and gathered all of her documentation that was necessary and always provided feedback while I was filling out the paperwork. it is definitely a tedious process and I could not imagine a beneficiary performing this on his/her own.

Edited July 17, 2014 by Thane

[landr 126]

OP, any update on trying to talk to him about this and finding out what's behind his behaviour?

[crystal01 29]

I did most of it too. No biggie, I am more organized than he is. He just needed to sign.

[Lights 56]

I'm really sorry you're having a difficult time and that your partner isn't giving you the support and help you need.

From the beginning, my husband has done 99% of all the research and paperwork. He filled out all the forms and I was the one to get all my documents in order (police certificate, vaccinations, etc.). Once we were married, my husband continued to do most of the paperwork... even filling out our health insurance application with my information and just having me sign it. He feels that it's the least he could do because I am doing so much changing and moving. Because he works office hours, I have had to go to the DMV and SSA offices on my own but if he could take me, he would.

I think you have to discuss with him that this is new for you too and you would like his help. It's not just about immigration forms, it's about marriage and partnership and supporting one another. No one likes to do these forms because it's time consuming and it is expensive when you mess up. I would have a discussion about this with him... you have moved all the way over here to be with your spouse and just want the support.

[rlogan 2,036]

She did almost nothing, and what little she did had mistakes that required corrections. Like spelling my name wrong, despite repeated emphatic and dire warnings that every single letter of every word had to be precisely correct on something this important. In one ear and out the other.

I didn't marry her to fill out my paperwork though. She does spectacular work at her job function.

[sassyseawitch 1]

My first reaction is 'Wow'.

I have done all the research an assembly of everything.

I informed Hiedy what documents I needed from Phils and sent money for her to buy them.

I have a vested interest to make sure everything goes smoothly.

We are both deaf and Hiedy does t read English well.

Hoping your plans go well.

[Dieseltu 19]

I am doing ALL the immigration papers for my Chinese wife, since she got to America. She cant read a lick of English. Furthermore we (she) hired a Chinese attorney to do the initial K1 application in China. And since I was present, it made the AOS application a lot easier. As he sent me home with a lot of it finished already. And its pretty much a duplication of the initial application. When my wife had to do her interview papers, He helped with that and made the CITIC payment. And when she failed her interview he straightened that out and we got approved. Within a couple of weeks. The wife had to make the interview trip by train just after the embassy moved. And it was about 15 hours one way. and a lot of walking. To get rejected and take that trip home was hard on her. And she was whipped. Honestly , if it wasn't for her finding the attorney she wouldn't be here. She did her share, but my share is a lot bigger. And in America my share is all of it.

[TBoneTX 46,137]

Post with personal information edited and returned to thread, as follows:

Hello, Michael-Moneth, added you as a friend, feel free to send raven52 and his beautiful wife an e mail to personal information edited by VJ Moderation .,.,,., would help you in any way, as we hav went through the AOS and wife has her 2 yr. GC. and will file ROc in a little over a year.

Again, feel free to e mail us, need good friends, especially from the Phils..,.,and the wives would have a lot in common being, I think I saw, from Cebu.,.,.,

raven52

Personal e-mail addresses can be exchanged via PM. It's too risky to have them visible in public.

Edited July 19, 2014 by TBoneTX

[Annie123 6]

Thank you everyone for taking time to reply and share your experience with me, it helps and means a lot to me!

Somebody asked if things have improved - no, they haven't. Him not helping with the paperwork is just a tiny piece of everything. I'm so exhausted from it all and have come to the point of being ready to give up and go home. I'm not happy, I cry almost every day because of the things he does or the things he says to me. It just hurts so much and I don't think anybody deserves to live like that. I'm just so tired.

[JIJourney 96]

The way my fiance and I look at it is

My fiance will say "I Support You"

I will say "I'm All In!"

That is all there is to know