Hello and not so brief introduction.

[Chris_rak_Nana 2]

Welcome Chris! Yes it is a long process but like you said it is so worth it! Just be patient and read ahead so you are informed. If your case is a straight case, you can get lots of help on VJ to help you through the process. The hardest part is the waiting and the missing each other! If you have any question just post it on here as well as some of the threads of people filing the same time as you. I find that we are always looking and answering each other quicker cause we just been through it.

Also reading the guides, the flow chart and the RFE master list helped me a lot so I know what to look out for and what not to freak out on when I do get my first and only RFE( Request for Evidence). Lots of sleepless nights, the time zone thing, the lost in translation or the internet God's acting up and cutting you off...We know! Welcome,You're in great company!

Thank you for the encouragement and kind words.

There is a lot of information to take in for this process. I just want to do it right the first time that I send it. I am more concerned with getting her to do what she needs to do. Its very hard to communicate to her what needs to be done, but we will get through it.

"Lots of sleepless nights, the time zone thing, the lost in translation or the internet God's acting up and cutting you off...We know! Welcome, You're in great company!" This is a great statement. Its good to know that I am not alone. 11 hours time difference between us, google translate has caused an argument or two, and the internet in Thailand is terrible.....trust me, I feel your pain. It takes patience and effort to make this work, but will pay off in the end. Thanks for taking the time to post here.

Take care,

Chris

[Chris_rak_Nana 2]

welcome to the forum

Thank you very much. Happy to be here. Seems to be a very good group of people here.

[Lena&Islam 9]

Thank you for the encouragement and kind words.

There is a lot of information to take in for this process. I just want to do it right the first time that I send it. I am more concerned with getting her to do what she needs to do. Its very hard to communicate to her what needs to be done, but we will get through it.

"Lots of sleepless nights, the time zone thing, the lost in translation or the internet God's acting up and cutting you off...We know! Welcome, You're in great company!" This is a great statement. Its good to know that I am not alone. 11 hours time difference between us, google translate has caused an argument or two, and the internet in Thailand is terrible.....trust me, I feel your pain. It takes patience and effort to make this work, but will pay off in the end. Thanks for taking the time to post here.

Take care,

Chris

I come from the country right next to Thailand. You won't offend people if you just love her because they will see your love shining through, love needs no translation. They just want their daughter to be happy and you are trying to understand their culture. Respect her parents, elders and her brothers. Family is the core of who she is and now you are a part of that unit. They know you are not from their culture and will be very polite. Learn some Thai, even a few words makes them happy!

I still always apologize first if I think I'm offending any elders before I speak. Be humble and try new things( yes that means the food too, cause she is Thai and will be cooking that food in the house) just be yourself. We don't do PDA, it is very private between couples. Be helpful but know there are different roles there for men and women.

About the internet and language...be patient, don't get upset before asking for clarification. My fiancé speaks fluent English and yet because of the quality of internet connection, time zones, lack of sleep, stress, and slangs we've had a few misunderstanding too. Overall what I've found during this time was the chance for us to keep deepening our relationship. It's knowing how committed we are to each other and how we problem solve as a couple. Being in a long distance relationship( and doing all of this paperwork ) will test the both of you more so than you ever thought. Take this time to deepened the bond between you before she gets here.

Good luck and if you need help, everyone is here to help you!

[Andy and Pui 16]

Welcome to VJ. I agree with Ning and get the copy of Thailand Fever and read it soon. About the food let Nana know now. I like almost all thai food except shrimp paste. When Pui is making food she will either make it without shrimp paste and we will both eat that or if she wants the shrimp paste she will make it one without and one with for her. Last time I was in Thailand I spent over 2 weeks back at Pui's parents house in the village. Most of her family does not speak much English but every time we would go to eat some one would always let me know what had shrimp paste in it so I did not eat it. Who knows when you go to meet the family you might be surprised one might be able to speak English. The first time I met Pui's family her oldest sister started speaking a little English to me and my Mom. Pui was surprised by her own sister that she could speak a little English to myself and my Mom.

I also suggest the music as a way to learn English. My Mom and Pui have suggested that to Pui's 3 nieces who are young teenagers. If they ever listened I have no idea. I know one of the things Pui did when she was here in US while waiting for the EAD to come was to watch on youtube the songs with lyrics and she also did that back in Thailand when she was in university.

[Chris_rak_Nana 2]

I come from the country right next to Thailand. You won't offend people if you just love her because they will see your love shining through, love needs no translation. They just want their daughter to be happy and you are trying to understand their culture. Respect her parents, elders and her brothers. Family is the core of who she is and now you are a part of that unit. They know you are not from their culture and will be very polite. Learn some Thai, even a few words makes them happy!

I still always apologize first if I think I'm offending any elders before I speak. Be humble and try new things( yes that means the food too, cause she is Thai and will be cooking that food in the house) just be yourself. We don't do PDA, it is very private between couples. Be helpful but know there are different roles there for men and women.

About the internet and language...be patient, don't get upset before asking for clarification. My fiancé speaks fluent English and yet because of the quality of internet connection, time zones, lack of sleep, stress, and slangs we've had a few misunderstanding too. Overall what I've found during this time was the chance for us to keep deepening our relationship. It's knowing how committed we are to each other and how we problem solve as a couple. Being in a long distance relationship( and doing all of this paperwork ) will test the both of you more so than you ever thought. Take this time to deepened the bond between you before she gets here.

Good luck and if you need help, everyone is here to help you!

Can you give some examples of the different roles of man and women? I have never really thought about offending them by trying to help. Thanks for bringing that to my attention.

We are getting much better with the misunderstandings. I try to have patience with her. I do not want to make her feel bad because she cant speak English. She tries and that's good enough for me. It is very frustrating, but I try to hide my frustration. Her English is better than my Thai, so I don't judge.

If a couple can make it thru a long distance relationship and the stress of the visa, then everyday life when you are together should be a piece of cake. We just have to remind ourselves that it will be worth the wait.

[Chris_rak_Nana 2]

(Two quoted posts requested removed by the OP have been removed - VJ Moderation Team)

Welcome to VJ. I agree with Ning and get the copy of Thailand Fever and read it soon. About the food let Nana know now. I like almost all thai food except shrimp paste. When Pui is making food she will either make it without shrimp paste and we will both eat that or if she wants the shrimp paste she will make it one without and one with for her. Last time I was in Thailand I spent over 2 weeks back at Pui's parents house in the village. Most of her family does not speak much English but every time we would go to eat some one would always let me know what had shrimp paste in it so I did not eat it. Who knows when you go to meet the family you might be surprised one might be able to speak English. The first time I met Pui's family her oldest sister started speaking a little English to me and my Mom. Pui was surprised by her own sister that she could speak a little English to myself and my Mom.

I also suggest the music as a way to learn English. My Mom and Pui have suggested that to Pui's 3 nieces who are young teenagers. If they ever listened I have no idea. I know one of the things Pui did when she was here in US while waiting for the EAD to come was to watch on youtube the songs with lyrics and she also did that back in Thailand when she was in university.

It sounds like I should buy the book. Do you know if its carried at any of the big bookstores, or does it have to be ordered from Amazon?

I like the music idea. Her birthday is coming and I thought about sending her an ipod loaded with music. I wouldn't know what to put on it though. Can you guys give me some ideas? I don't think that I want her learning English from Lil Wayne, so I'll probably leave that out. I like the youtube idea also, so she can hear the song and read the lyrics at the same time. I like it.

I know how important food is to Thai's, so the food issue is still stressing me a little. I am not very adventurous when it comes to trying new foods. I guess that I should try to broaden my horizons a little. I will not be eating any shrimp paste though. That is just wrong. She loves spicy food and I cant eat it. She fed me some shrimp from her plate one night at dinner and it must have had a little pepper hidden under it. I thought that I was going to die. Its not like spicy American or Mexican food where it only burns your tongue. My whole head was on fire! I didn't feel to manly at that moment.....sitting there with a red face and tears streaming down my face, while she begged the waitress to bring me more Coke. I must have pissed her off earlier in the day and that was her revenge:)

Edited July 23, 2014 by Kathryn41
to remove quoted posts requested removed by the OP

[Ryan H 3,834]

**Three posts removed per poster's request.**

[Ryan H 3,834]

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