Is This Woman Totally Screwed Now?

[nice_man 0]

A friend of mine told me the other day about the predicament that one of her friends is in. I'm not sure of all the exact details of her case but just knowing what I know so far about this case makes me think that this woman's situation is very grave.

Here's what I do know:

This woman was sponsored by an American and came to America and got married. As far as what happened after that it's still kind of sketchy to me but as unbelievable as it sounds it appears as if her American sponsor would not permit her to complete the AOS process then - not sure if they even started the AOS process or how far into the process they might have gotten. Apparently this American sponsor is a real control freak (I don't even know why he sponsored her in the first place but I believe he has a negative history with sponsoring others....) and he wouldn't let her complete the AOS process.

As you know, one cannot complete the AOS process without their spouse's involvement - at least I couldn't, anyway! I think that this woman somehow had obtained a work permit though and was working in the USA. Then her American sponsor decided to completely pull the plug on his sponsorship of her and said he wasn't interested in her anymore. Of course she lost her work permit when he did that and now can't work anymore - she's at the mercy of her friends to get her by for now. Unfortunately, it's really looking like she's going to get deported over all of this. She does have an attorney and is probably trying to work all the angles right now to prevent deportation.

But, my question is... has anybody ever heard of this before? Can you just decide to pull the sponsorship of someone off the table and leave them hanging high and dry? It sounds like this American sponsor has done this before to other women... in which case I have to wonder why USCIS hasn't flagged him and his brutal history of this. Anyway, I believe that this woman really wants to stay in America but she may just be flat out screwed. Even if she entered into the relationship in good faith would that even matter? - I mean her AOS process never got off the ground, which isn't good at all.

Any thoughts on this are welcome, although I think that ultimately this one is going to be for the attorneys. I'm just wondering if anyone else thinks that this woman might be screwed too....

[rebeccajo 14]

It happens often.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

A friend of mine told me the other day about the predicament that one of her friends is in. I'm not sure of all the exact details of her case but just knowing what I know so far about this case makes me think that this woman's situation is very grave.

Here's what I do know:

This woman was sponsored by an American and came to America and got married. As far as what happened after that it's still kind of sketchy to me but as unbelievable as it sounds it appears as if her American sponsor would not permit her to complete the AOS process then - not sure if they even started the AOS process or how far into the process they might have gotten. Apparently this American sponsor is a real control freak (I don't even know why he sponsored her in the first place but I believe he has a negative history with sponsoring others....) and he wouldn't let her complete the AOS process.

As you know, one cannot complete the AOS process without their spouse's involvement - at least I couldn't, anyway! I think that this woman somehow had obtained a work permit though and was working in the USA. Then her American sponsor decided to completely pull the plug on his sponsorship of her and said he wasn't interested in her anymore. Of course she lost her work permit when he did that and now can't work anymore - she's at the mercy of her friends to get her by for now. Unfortunately, it's really looking like she's going to get deported over all of this. She does have an attorney and is probably trying to work all the angles right now to prevent deportation.

But, my question is... has anybody ever heard of this before? Can you just decide to pull the sponsorship of someone off the table and leave them hanging high and dry? It sounds like this American sponsor has done this before to other women... in which case I have to wonder why USCIS hasn't flagged him and his brutal history of this. Anyway, I believe that this woman really wants to stay in America but she may just be flat out screwed. Even if she entered into the relationship in good faith would that even matter? - I mean her AOS process never got off the ground, which isn't good at all.

Any thoughts on this are welcome, although I think that ultimately this one is going to be for the attorneys. I'm just wondering if anyone else thinks that this woman might be screwed too....

Check the VAWA process, and if she has sufficient evidence to support a claim of abuse( yes withholding sponsorship can be labelled as such) she might have an opportunity.

[Ladylethal 12]

Happens often, and it's allowed.

One thing that always amazes me as how these people that come and get abused, divorced, etc before the AOS is completed can't simply go home? Is not like they've been living here long enough to have set deeper roots than the ones back home, right?

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Happens often, and it's allowed.

One thing that always amazes me as how these people that come and get abused, divorced, etc before the AOS is completed can't simply go home? Is not like they've been living here long enough to have set deeper roots than the ones back home, right?

Well aside from some of the dynamics of abuse (emotional and physical) that cause an individual to question their ability and self-worth, which can impact one's ability to reason or have a more positive outlook, sometimes an alien has little ties to one's homeland to begin with, or has severed ties to the homeland that simply cannot be re-established so quickly. Getting back might take funds that are not available. Becoming self sufficient once back home might be a daunting thought on top of it. Let's not forget that abusive partners attempt to foist control over finances and often an alien has little access to money or resources. We all see the comments on this board, for example, of how adjusting to a new life here can be under-estimated. Imagine attempting to do that, initially, finding that one's spouse is not as represented and then having to consider adjusting once more back home. All to be done with little to no financial assistance. Couple that with a lower sense of self esteem and it just might be easier to stay and try to make it work in one's current environment.

[John & Annie 0]

A friend of mine told me the other day about the predicament that one of her friends is in. I'm not sure of all the exact details of her case but just knowing what I know so far about this case makes me think that this woman's situation is very grave.

Here's what I do know:

This woman was sponsored by an American and came to America and got married. As far as what happened after that it's still kind of sketchy to me but as unbelievable as it sounds it appears as if her American sponsor would not permit her to complete the AOS process then - not sure if they even started the AOS process or how far into the process they might have gotten. Apparently this American sponsor is a real control freak (I don't even know why he sponsored her in the first place but I believe he has a negative history with sponsoring others....) and he wouldn't let her complete the AOS process.

As you know, one cannot complete the AOS process without their spouse's involvement - at least I couldn't, anyway! I think that this woman somehow had obtained a work permit though and was working in the USA. Then her American sponsor decided to completely pull the plug on his sponsorship of her and said he wasn't interested in her anymore. Of course she lost her work permit when he did that and now can't work anymore - she's at the mercy of her friends to get her by for now. Unfortunately, it's really looking like she's going to get deported over all of this. She does have an attorney and is probably trying to work all the angles right now to prevent deportation.

But, my question is... has anybody ever heard of this before? Can you just decide to pull the sponsorship of someone off the table and leave them hanging high and dry? It sounds like this American sponsor has done this before to other women... in which case I have to wonder why USCIS hasn't flagged him and his brutal history of this. Anyway, I believe that this woman really wants to stay in America but she may just be flat out screwed. Even if she entered into the relationship in good faith would that even matter? - I mean her AOS process never got off the ground, which isn't good at all.

Any thoughts on this are welcome, although I think that ultimately this one is going to be for the attorneys. I'm just wondering if anyone else thinks that this woman might be screwed too....

The contract I signed for sponsorship would not let me out of it that easily. I concur with the above. Sounds like an abuse case, there are lots of charities that will give her free help through this.

[DelcoCouple 1]

..... Apparently this American sponsor is a real control freak (I don't even know why he sponsored her in the first place but I believe he has a negative history with sponsoring others....) and he wouldn't let her complete the AOS process....

I would suggest that there is rather more to this story than the brief facts given. There are three sides to every failed marital story, the mans, the womans and the truth!

It is often difficult enough for people to give good advice when all the facts are out in the open. To give advice based on a one sided hearsay appraisal of a situation would not perhaps be the most prudent action.

Edited January 18, 2007 by DelcoCouple

[hockeybrain 0]

..... Apparently this American sponsor is a real control freak (I don't even know why he sponsored her in the first place but I believe he has a negative history with sponsoring others....) and he wouldn't let her complete the AOS process....

I would suggest that there is rather more to this story than the brief facts given. There are three sides to every failed marital story, the mans, the womans and the truth!

It is often difficult enough for people to give good advice when all the facts are out in the open. To give advice based on a one sided hearsay appraisal of a situation would not perhaps be the most prudent action.

Sounds like a person who should be thrown out of the country. The foreigner was committing visa fraud.