Long Overdue Update - from K1 Approval to hopefully Spousal visa approval

[JLSBMF 16]

So my fiancée Saif arrived back in November and we were married within a week....so much happened that I wasn't prepared for even though I thought I was.

Culture shock for him - seeing me go to work everyday while he stayed home was the hardest to his manhood - having to share me with my children , family and friends when for so long it was just us...my stress level with trying to make everything perfect all the time led to me being short tempered and him feeling like I wasn't the same woman he fell in love with.... bills - stress - work - kids I had so much on my plate...

he fell into a deep depression and became isolated and at times abusive - verbally and emotionally - he could not cope with my independence and I could not cope with being in a cage.....on high emotions he decided to go back to Jordan even though I begged to have him calm down , slow down and try to work things out. It was hopeless and so we filed for divorce and he left - he left sobbing like a baby and regretted his decision immediately.... for months and months we kept trying to make it work back on viber and tango and whatsapp - find away to work past what happened when he was here - what caused us both to crumble and become these two people neither of us knew. I was getting more and more frustrated that after all my hard work here we were again separated so with one final burst of energy - one final give it all I got - I flew back to Amman and spent 8 days with him..... we cried like babies, we argued and made up ... we were in separable - we laughed at our selves and all the craziness that happened when he was here... and finally we both came to the realization that no relationship is perfect and that no matter what we want to be together forever - good and bad - sickness and in health - richer or poorer - we are one.

So now in a few months I will be flying back to Amman and getting married there and begin the whole spouse visa process.....

I cant imagine what USCIS will think when they review our files and story - I will just hope for the best cause only two crazy in love idiots would be where we are today.....

Jen

[Darnell 8,479]

if you got married in the USA already -

you could file the I-130 this week.

although you said you filed for divorce -

if the prove-up and granting not occur - you can withdraw the petition for divorce at the courthouse where you filed and then chase after the I-130 ...

[JLSBMF 16]

The divorce went thru - he felt that we were jinxed from the beginning cause we didn't have a real wedding or honeymoon .. just the court house ceremony.

He promised if I went thru with the divorce he would make it up to me with a real wedding - real honeymoon.

We haven't been really apart one day since he left and even at the divorce hearing he was with me on the phone all day comforting me. I still have all the proof of our contact since he left in January and new photos and proof from my trip last week.

I wonder if anyone else out there had similar circumstances...

[Darnell 8,479]

ok - sorry - nevermind.

[Cathi 5,814]

Jen I am so happy you decided to wok things out. I knew of the marriage and divorce and how difficult it was for you. I'm happy that you're happy. Know that I'm always here for you and I'm still just a phone call away.

Moath and I just got back from Amman, we were there for a month. When we planned the trip it was for pleasure, and that's how the first few weeks were. Unexpectedly while we were there his dad passed away. It was heartbreaking as he was very close to his dad and his mom and dad were inseparable for the entire 45 years they were married. His mom is lost without him. It was so difficult for us to leave.

<3 you

[JLSBMF 16]

Hi Honey,

I'm so sorry for Moath's loss - I'm sure it was devastating for you all... a small blessing that he was there with his family and that you were there to comfort him.

God rest his and I pray for his family to stay strong especially with Ramadan coming ..

As for me Saif and I still have a long way to go - he is working in Najaf Iraq and I fear for his safety with the current situation. The eight days in Amman helped a lot to cement our commitment and work thru the hell we went thru here. I'm still weary but leaning on faith - there is no other man for me period just wish he was a bit easier to deal with and not so much like my dad - stubborn as hell but more loving, protective and affectionate than describable.

I laughed and told him we are like Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton - we love strong , fight strong but we love and enjoy the hell out of each other

I will need your wonderful advice on the getting married there procedures - I cant stay very long so any tips on anything I can do ahead of time would be so appreciated.

I'm keeping a low profile on FB - don't want too many interfering in my relationship - I actually had to hide the fact to my family and friends I was in Amman.

hugs and deepest sympathy to Moath and family.

Jen

[Cathi 5,814]

A few tips:

If you're marrying in a Jordanian court make sure you have your birth certificates, passports and any and all divorce decrees with you when you go to the court(I'm pretty sure you need all of this if an Imam is marrying you at home, as well). I made the mistake of not bringing my divorce decree with me to Jordan and it was a huge hassle getting it from the US. The US embassy can't do anything as far as providing any kind of proof of divorce from the US(I tried). The embassy used to issue letters saying people were free and clear to marry if they went to the embassy and swore under oath they were single or divorced. but they stopped doing it a few months before Mo and I married. Make sure Saif also has proof of Jordanian residency or citizenship. We could only be married in the court who had jurisdiction in the area he lived in Amman.

Make sure you give yourself at least 2 weeks in Jordan when marrying as getting all the papers in order and stamped took us quite awhile. EVERYTHING in Jordan had to be stamped and by all different agencies, it was a pain in the neck.

Jordan has the law for not getting remarried for at least 4 months after divorce. I'm not sure how that will work as I'm, not sure when you're getting remarried, how long the divorce will be final and the fact that you're marrying the same person you just divorced.

There are only certain hospitals and clinics who can do the bloodwork for marriage. I forget what they were but I can ask Moath if need be, I know he will remember.

That's all for now. If I remember anything else I'll let you know.

[JLSBMF 16]

thanks sweetie -

2 weeks is going to be tough for me to be away again so soon so this might have to wait till the end of the year ( which I hope not)

I read about the importance of having everything translated into Arabic ahead of time - my divorce decrees etc

I wonder if I can file the petition while I'm in Amman at the embassy? I wonder if there would be any expedite to the current situation in Iraq and his working there -he is Najaf but the situation is deteriorating daily...