visa denied 01-16

[Barry2005 0]

theres a difference in coaching and practicing

i would go over questions that she is going to get asked

it would make the spouse more comfortable to know what to expect

coaching would be more like telling them to answer a specific way

like in an attempt to hide facts or an attempt to make things appear a certain way.

You can practice, coach, or whatever you want to call it but, just don't include them in your emails that you give your consular for proof of ongoing relationship.

[Barry2005 0]

Well, I have told Elena when the time comes for her interview to speak English but only if she understands what is being asked of her. I mean, her English is pretty good if one speaks slowly enough and restricts their vocabulary a bit. Will the CO do this? I dunno. So English yes, but Russian to understand the interviewer if necessary. I get different vibes on this subject. I think it is more important to understand what is being asked of you than trying to impress the CO with English skills that are not quite good enough conduct the interview. Just my thoughts........

I thought Olga's English was good. We even had good conversations on the phone (as much as 30min). Maybe she can only understand me because I talk a little slower for her and pause between some words. I was surprised when she told me that she was scolded for her English at the interview.

My understanding is the Consular will interview her in English. I just hope you don't get the consular we got.... she is tough.

[Barry2005 0]

...most specifically if you met online.

[wissooner 0]

The language is not really the main issue, it's the presentation, or the "sale" of the relationship.

I think this is right on. The presentation is most important. This is were I am the most worried. Elena already knows just about everything about me that the interviewer would ask of her. But I am worried that Elena will be very nervous (afterall, we are playing for keeps here with this interview) and degrade her 'presentation' because of this nervousness. I think all I can do is to just keep boasting her confidence......

[slim 1,525]

It's usually followed by a "spasiba for the green card... sucker!" (because now she's learned some English), and then a divorce. Not exactly a bonus for visa issuance.

I'm fascinated by just how many such stories there are. From my understanding of Russian women who do leave Russia (there is prior intent when they posted themselves on the international dating website), that a majority of marriages end like this. We don't have to look far as there have already been several cases in the Russian forum itself. A lot of members here haven't had their wives here long enough to know their fates, but I'm curious to see how things will play out in a few years down the line.

I'll place myself in that category! (Waiting to see how it plays out.) I've seen several guys who married girls they met on websites or knew for three months or whatever, and they've all been surprised when it didn't work out, down the road. I've known Elena for six years, and I'm still not going to put our odds at 100%. Call me pessimistic, say it's horrible for not putting our relationship at a 100% guaranteed success rate, say whatever you want about that. But in reality, there are no guarantees when it comes to a successful marriage. You can narrow or improve your odds, but as far as being "guaranteed" to work or not work, it's impossible. All we can do is narrow our odds to the greatest chances of success, and go for it!

Anyone who thinks they've got a "guaranteed" winner, or true love, or whatever, is aiming very high. Granted, most probably do everything they can to stack the odds in their favor, but even with marriages here between Americans, there's something like a 60% divorce rate. Add to that the fact that you speak a different language, come from a different culture, don't really know each other all that well, and you're increasing your odds for divorce significantly.

That's why presenting to the C/O anything and everything that you can to decrease those odds (of divorce) is important. The language spoken during that process is unimportant, presenting a "real relationship" is. If you can communicate effectively in English, in Russian, in baby-talk to each other, that's fine; you just have to be able to show the C/O that you can. And really, that falls on the beneficiary more than on the petitioner, as they're the ones that are there. Not saying your beneficiary messes up the process if they can't speak English all that well, but if she goes in there OBVIOUSLY not knowing too much about you (because you've only corresponded for six months via e-mail and phone conversations, after meeting one time for sex and a picture in front of St. Basil's) then it doesn't look good, and it doesn't prove to the C/O that you have an existing relationship, let alone one with potential for the future. It does look like you found a hot chick's picture on the internet and she agreed to move to America to "marry" you. However, if you take the time to really work on the questions that she's going to have to answer, then she should be able to go in there and knock their socks off with all the stuff she knows about you. Plus, you should know all that about her too. If you constantly have a dialogue open about your personal lives in relation to each other... guess what that is? A REAL RELATIONSHIP!!!!! Congratulations, you just got the visa.

The future... that's up to you! (And me. Still trying, still waiting to see how that plays out.) Good luck to all. Remember to step outside of your relationship. Don't give your beneficiary the benefit of the doubt about the interview or take the attitude, "she'll be OK." ENSURE she knows the stuff she needs to know. And if she doesn't.... maybe you should postpone the interview... and maybe even the other stuff too. Play devil's advocate for yourself. Be "hard" on your own case. If you can't prove it to "yourself" (yourself acting like the C/O) then they're not going to buy it either. MAKE IT REAL!!!

[Asamu 0]

I am glad to realize, after all the crazyness that unvailed on this thread - you got APPROVED ...

I was just bitting my nails as I went on reading , one posting after the other...

CONGRATULATIONS! Prepare yourself as your loved one is on her way!!!

All the best!!!

Asamu

[The_dip_sticks 0]

Dito with Asamu I was just reading looking for Barrys posts hoping to see a happy ending. Im glad it all worked out. Its a good thing to learn from these experiences not to take all the evidence peopele have for granted. There is nothing wrong with having more than enough evidence at the interview.

[girlfrmoz 1]

I am so glad you got approved in the end! Congratulations for a happy ending!

[Chuckles 0]

I always enjoy the happy ending !!!!