Your Mate

[Henia 11]

Great post Wendy. We have had this posted a few times, but it is always good to refresh it in our minds and explore reasons others fell in love with their mates.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well my husband in my opinion is a great person and man inside and out. Corny as it sounds, he is my soulmate. I had my doubts at first, but in the end my first feeling (way down deep) was correct---> He is the one for me!

What attracted me to my husband at first was that he is very optimist, always seeing the up side of every situation. ' He seems to swear by the 'I BELIEVE' motto. That if we believe we can achieve anything.

Mostly I think this comes from his upbringing and his country's not so recent tragic history.

My husband is also very imaginative and adventerous (something I was not really until I met him).

And not to mention he is very easy on the eyes. Another corny thing, but I will share this... if I were to make list of physical characteristcs I would ideally want in a man... my husband would come out. I have been overly blessed.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His compassion and unworldly selflessness and gentle, patient, malleable nature astonishes me even to this day. And agian, not to mention the looks. *wink*wink*

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Well, I am still working throu them for my family. But many sterotypes have been and are being broken.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men marry several wives:
  

My husband is intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful. He understands and knows the reasoning for this particular part in his religion, but admints it is not for him.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men are egotistical, self-indulgent, male chauvinist who rules his home with a iron fist:
  They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.
  

[Henia 11]

Great post Wendy. We have had this posted a few times, but it is always good to refresh it in our minds and explore reasons others fell in love with their mates.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well my husband in my opinion is a great person and man inside and out. Corny as it sounds, he is my soulmate. I had my doubts at first, but in the end my first feeling (way down deep) was correct---> He is the one for me!

What attracted me to my husband at first was that he is very optimist, always seeing the up side of every situation. ' He seems to swear by the 'I BELIEVE' motto. That if we believe we can achieve anything.

Mostly I think this comes from his upbringing and his country's not so recent tragic history.

My husband is also very imaginative and adventerous (something I was not really until I met him).

And not to mention he is very easy on the eyes. Another corny thing, but I will share this... if I were to make list of physical characteristcs I would ideally want in a man... my husband would come out. I have been overly blessed.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His compassion and unworldly selflessness and gentle, patient, malleable nature astonishes me even to this day. And agian, not to mention the looks. *wink*wink*

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Well, I am still working throu them for my family. But many sterotypes have been and are being broken.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men marry several wives:
  

My husband is intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful. He understands and knows the reasoning for this particular part in his religion, but admints it is not for him.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men are egotistical, self-indulgent, male chauvinist who rules his home with a iron fist:
  They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.
  

[Henia 11]

Great post Wendy. We have had this posted a few times, but it is always good to refresh it in our minds and explore reasons others fell in love with their mates.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well my husband in my opinion is a great person and man inside and out. Corny as it sounds, he is my soulmate. I had my doubts at first, but in the end my first feeling (way down deep) was correct---> He is the one for me!

What attracted me to my husband at first was that he is very optimist, always seeing the up side of every situation. ' He seems to swear by the 'I BELIEVE' motto. That if we believe we can achieve anything.

Mostly I think this comes from his upbringing and his country's not so recent tragic history.

My husband is also very imaginative and adventerous (something I was not really until I met him).

And not to mention he is very easy on the eyes. Another corny thing, but I will share this... if I were to make list of physical characteristcs I would ideally want in a man... my husband would come out. I have been overly blessed.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His compassion and unworldly selflessness and gentle, patient, malleable nature astonishes me even to this day. And agian, not to mention the looks. *wink*wink*

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Well, I am still working throu them for my family. But many sterotypes have been and are being broken.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men marry several wives:
  

My husband is intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful. He understands and knows the reasoning for this particular part in his religion, but admints it is not for him.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men are egotistical, self-indulgent, male chauvinist who rules his home with a iron fist:
  They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.
  

[~Jackie~ 30]

When I first saw Mohammed's face on webcam, I saw an honesty in his eyes that I fell in love with. Sometimes he's too honest, but I have learned to adapt to that. Like others have said, I saw him treat his mother and sisters with respect. This was endearing.

My sister said of my first trip to Jordan, 'He won't let you return.' I said 'after a week with me,,he'll let me go' By the second and third trip my family was placing orders what they wanted me to bring them.

Jackie

[Henia 11]

Great post Wendy. This has been donw a few times, but I am glad to see it reappear, renewing why we love our SOs and breaking stereotypes.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Even thou, I had doubts when we first met, my husband was and is my soulmate. We complete each other.

What made me attracted to him: 'I BELIEVE' motto he lives by. Believing anything is possible, even the impossible if we pray and put our minds to it. A never dying optimistism. He seems to always see the up side of any situation. (Which I donnot)

He possess a gentle, patient, easygoing, affectionate, malleable nature which is refreshing. He is also very adventurous... he makes me 'do' things I would normally not even think about doing.

I like his eyes and esp his smile. I like other things but I will not mention them here.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His comanding presence (just his height alone LOL) and easygoing nature makes me somehow feel secure, calm and less stressed out. I can be who I really am inside with him. He cannot be shocked or made angry easily. Believe me, I have tried. He is also very skillfully adaptable in various situations.

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

As I think with many MENA people and our families (and country's) we too had to and are still having to break many stereotypical thinking:

MENA men are egostistical, self-indulgent male chauvanists who want everything their way and they rule with a iron fist:

My husband in fact is more considered with others, then himslef. His family is number 1 is his heart and mind. I see that not only the way he treats me, but his family, friends, collegues and now how he treats my daughter and my family. He has in a big way, mended my family wounds and reopened that door.He is also very generous. Giving without any thought, excepting nothing back.

He is also very compassionate, sensitive to the feelings of those around them, and responds with the utmost sympathy.

MENA men are not able nor want to adapt: My husband has accepted all people around him and the circumstances in which he finds himslef rather than push the person or situation to adapt him to suit himself, and he patiently wait for problems to sort themselves out.

Also he understands the role of polgamy in his religion, but also knows its rules and knows it is not for him.

He pushes me to do better in my profession, to continue to educate myself and my daughter.

MENA men are stuck in time and do everything by the book: My husband is imaginative and open-minded free thinker. Even thou, I veil he would have no trouble with me not veiling. He is more adventurous then me, willing to try new things more then I would.

MENA men want to run the show: My husband has no problems handing me the reins. He appreciates my ideas and our relation is 50/50.

Um, I just would like to apologise for mh post coming up so many times. I donnow what happened. Also I enjoyed reading everyone's posts.

[Heartland 0]

Thank you so much for your postings. I really loved the intense feelings you all portrayed. It makes me feel that love is alive and well contrary to what you read about all the time.

Thank you so much for sharing!!!!!

Wendy

[Bosco 1]

Great post Wendy. We have had this posted a few times, but it is always good to refresh it in our minds and explore reasons others fell in love with their mates.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well my husband in my opinion is a great person and man inside and out. Corny as it sounds, he is my soulmate. I had my doubts at first, but in the end my first feeling (way down deep) was correct---> He is the one for me!

What attracted me to my husband at first was that he is very optimist, always seeing the up side of every situation. ' He seems to swear by the 'I BELIEVE' motto. That if we believe we can achieve anything.

Mostly I think this comes from his upbringing and his country's not so recent tragic history.

My husband is also very imaginative and adventerous (something I was not really until I met him).

And not to mention he is very easy on the eyes. Another corny thing, but I will share this... if I were to make list of physical characteristcs I would ideally want in a man... my husband would come out. I have been overly blessed.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His compassion and unworldly selflessness and gentle, patient, malleable nature astonishes me even to this day. And agian, not to mention the looks. *wink*wink*

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Well, I am still working throu them for my family. But many sterotypes have been and are being broken.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men marry several wives:
  

My husband is intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful. He understands and knows the reasoning for this particular part in his religion, but admints it is not for him.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men are egotistical, self-indulgent, male chauvinist who rules his home with a iron fist:
  They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.
  

Henia,

I guess your husband is a Pisces!! What you wrote about him is almost word-for-word the description of a Pisces from lots of websites

Pisces

Pisces, Pisceans possess a gentle, patient, malleable nature.

They are nevertheless intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful.

and about MENA men in general:

They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.

Thankfully, not all our men are not Pisces, because I for one don't want an asexual man!

[Henia 11]

Thanks, I see you find it your duty to always pick at me. Yes, my husband is a Pisces and yes I did get some inspirations on how to word what I wanted to say.

Great post Wendy. We have had this posted a few times, but it is always good to refresh it in our minds and explore reasons others fell in love with their mates.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well my husband in my opinion is a great person and man inside and out. Corny as it sounds, he is my soulmate. I had my doubts at first, but in the end my first feeling (way down deep) was correct---> He is the one for me!

What attracted me to my husband at first was that he is very optimist, always seeing the up side of every situation. ' He seems to swear by the 'I BELIEVE' motto. That if we believe we can achieve anything.

Mostly I think this comes from his upbringing and his country's not so recent tragic history.

My husband is also very imaginative and adventerous (something I was not really until I met him).

And not to mention he is very easy on the eyes. Another corny thing, but I will share this... if I were to make list of physical characteristcs I would ideally want in a man... my husband would come out. I have been overly blessed.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His compassion and unworldly selflessness and gentle, patient, malleable nature astonishes me even to this day. And agian, not to mention the looks. *wink*wink*

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Well, I am still working throu them for my family. But many sterotypes have been and are being broken.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men marry several wives:
  

My husband is intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful. He understands and knows the reasoning for this particular part in his religion, but admints it is not for him.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men are egotistical, self-indulgent, male chauvinist who rules his home with a iron fist:
  They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.
  

Henia,

I guess your husband is a Pisces!! What you wrote about him is almost word-for-word the description of a Pisces from lots of websites

Pisces

Pisces, Pisceans possess a gentle, patient, malleable nature.

They are nevertheless intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful.

and about MENA men in general:

They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.

Thankfully, not all our men are not Pisces, because I for one don't want an asexual man!

[sarah and hicham 3]

Great post Wendy. We have had this posted a few times, but it is always good to refresh it in our minds and explore reasons others fell in love with their mates.

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well my husband in my opinion is a great person and man inside and out. Corny as it sounds, he is my soulmate. I had my doubts at first, but in the end my first feeling (way down deep) was correct---> He is the one for me!

What attracted me to my husband at first was that he is very optimist, always seeing the up side of every situation. ' He seems to swear by the 'I BELIEVE' motto. That if we believe we can achieve anything.

Mostly I think this comes from his upbringing and his country's not so recent tragic history.

My husband is also very imaginative and adventerous (something I was not really until I met him).

And not to mention he is very easy on the eyes. Another corny thing, but I will share this... if I were to make list of physical characteristcs I would ideally want in a man... my husband would come out. I have been overly blessed.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

His compassion and unworldly selflessness and gentle, patient, malleable nature astonishes me even to this day. And agian, not to mention the looks. *wink*wink*

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Well, I am still working throu them for my family. But many sterotypes have been and are being broken.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men marry several wives:
  

My husband is intensely loyal and home-loving and will remain faithful. He understands and knows the reasoning for this particular part in his religion, but admints it is not for him.

• Breaking the myth all MENA men are egotistical, self-indulgent, male chauvinist who rules his home with a iron fist:
  They are never egotistical in their personal relationships and give more than they ask from their friends. They are sexually delicate, in the extreme almost asexual, and most Pisceans would want a relationship in which the partner's mind and spirit rather than the body resonated with their own. Unfortunately they can be easily misled by a lover who courts them delicately and in marriage makes them unhappy by a coarser sexuality than they expected.
  

I have a question. I thought astrology and horoscopes were haram?

And what about plagarism?

[Sofiyya 1,687]

Thanks, I see you find it your duty to always pick at me. Yes, my husband is a Pisces and yes I did get some inspirations on how to word what I wanted to say.

You do English better than a lot of folk here do French, Henia.

My husband is Pisces too, and I love it!

[Mandolin_68 0]

What made you attracted to your mate?

It sounds so shallow, but it was definately his looks. He has these gorgeous green eyes that don't even look real. And it's not that I've never seen a guy with green eyes before, but the way Fadi's eyes contrast with his dark hair and olive skin just hypnotized me from the moment I met him.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

After the initial surface lust I fell in love with his personality and mind. He treated me with such love and tenderness and looked at me in a way no man has ever looked at me before. It made me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, which he tells me I am everyday. We have been going through the Visa nightmare for 14 months now and in our entire 18 month relationship we've only spent about 6 months together. Yet his love and devotion to me has never wavered or faltered. I feel the separation and hell we have gone through has strengthened our relationship. When you are forced to carry on your relationship solely via the internet and phone you learn how to communicate without the distractions of physical contact....I really feel it solidifies and gives a relationship a firm basis from which to grow in the future (but even though I believe this I'd still give anything to have him here with me now ....LOL )

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Sadly, and I AM ashamed of this, the first stereotypes that I had to break through were my own. I was in the military and had some very distorted concepts and views regarding the Mid-Eastern culture. I volunteered to go to Iraq becasue I wanted to help kill dirty Iraqis. To me they were all ignorant towel heads who beat their wives, didn't bathe and sh*t in the street. The last type of man I ever expected to be attracted to was a Mid-Eastern.

I know now that this is why fate slapped me in the face with my wake-up call when I arrived and crossed paths with Fadi. He, as well as many other Iraqis, taught me so much.....and showed me that I and so many other Americans were the ignorant ones. My whole perspective transformed and I became a new person. Although Fadi is not Muslim, I was still surrounded on a daily basis by his friends and co-workers who were and I learned much about the religion. Most of these men treated their wives with more respect and referreed to them in a more loving manner than 90% of American men. (Becasue for some strange reason it means you're a PU$$Y if you gush and talk respectfully about your wife/girlfriend in the U.S.)

When I informed my family of my intentions to marry Fadi my mother was immidiately supportive. She is an amazning woman who has never judged a person based on race, culture or anything. She raised me to be that way but I allowed the military and others to influence me in a negative manner. My father, on the other hand, was not very accepting. He was sure Fadi was going to kidnap me and drag me by the hair to Mecca. (Even though I TOLD my father that Fadi is a Christian - ignorant Americans).

Anyway, I hope that my father's views shift once he meets Fadi and he learns half as much as I have. But even if nothign changes, it will not phase me. I will love Fadi no matter what my family thinks.

[Dwarf_Ogress 0]

What made you attracted to your mate?

Well since I met Marlon online, the first thing that I noticed about his personality was that he was very easy going as well as interested in what I had to say. I did see a photo of him and he is very beautiful and gorgeous in my eyes but by having a long-distance relationship, communication is what we have had to build. I love the fact that we can talk about anything and the way he always asks if I am alright everytime that I call him.

What was different about them that made you take a second and third look ect...?

My mother always taught me to take everything with a grain of salt. At the beginning of getting to know one and other online, I maintained distance when it came to how I was starting to feel about him. We had a few disagreements online and those are difficult because the keyboard does not amply express how one feels! He write me poetry! No man has ever done that for me before! After awhile we realized that he and I both want the same things out of life. We realized that our sense of humor is similar and we often knew what the other was thinking and what they would say!

What stereo types did you have to break down for your family to accept your mate...?

Thankfully my mother was very accepting of our relationship. Granted she only saw photos and spoke with him on the phone. Sadly she passed away in October. Before she left this world, I was crying and apologizing about how she would not get to meet him or see us married etc. She told me that he looks and sounds like a nice person and that I would be very happy. She also told me I would make a great mommy and coming from here that was a HUGE compliment! For the most part the rest of my family has been very supportive. Other than the occasional "he's using you for a green card" from bystanders is all I have really had to deal with. Marlon also heard that "American women go to Jamaica only for a fling and have many men in different countries." lol Bottom line: nobody has the right to judge Marlon or I or what we have. We are both secure in the knowledge of love, ourselves, and God.