husnand ruined my life now what?!

[Simeon 25]

I married this man out of pure love, he's destroyed my life,I would like to go back to my home country but if I do then I won't be able to come back to the USA, my line of work requires me to travel all over including the USA, my fiance visa is long expired. I just don't know what to do.

OP, it does not seem like your husband loves you, and these actions of his are those of an abuser. You have already overstayed your visa, and so it will be difficult to keep you in the US without a qualifying relationship to apply for a green card with. You can move back to your home country, but you may have to consider only doing the business travel outside of the US or find another line of work. Sorry this has happened to you, but things will get better.

[Mark88 184]

Hi all...... No I do not have my green card, he started the process and paid most of the fees but refuses to finish paying or co-operate any further.

If he started the process, what exactly did he already file (which forms)? Is the application still pending? Do you have any receipts from USCIS? If you can provide more exact information, you might get better answers and the process might not be lost for you yet.

[walfredo 2]

Check this out. You have rights. If you came here and married this guy and he turned out to be abusive, controlling, or both, you have rights.

http://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/USCIS/Humanitarian/Battered%20Spouse,%20Children%20%26%20Parents/IMBRA%20Pamphlet%20Final%2001-07-2011%20for%20Web%20Posting.pdf

[walfredo 2]

There is lots of information and help available to you, through the VAWA (Violence against women act) and protections for immigrants who are being abused (it sounds like this applies to you).

You can also contact this organization, they deal with immigration and abuse situations. They even offer free legal advice. I recommend talking to a lawyer who knows about the immigrations system:

http://www.wfmn.org/

Heres another great organization:

http://icwclaw.org/services-available/violence-against-women-act-vawa/

Edited June 4, 2014 by walfredo

[Simeon 25]

If you have been battered or suffered extreme cruelty by a spouse who is/was a USC or LPR, then you qualify for VAWA.

This site also may help you find an immigration lawyer experienced in VAWA:

http://www.womenslaw.org/gethelp_type.php?type_name=Finding%20a%20Lawyer

Many of them are free or low cost.

[tehans 52]

I didn't see anywhere the OP stated her husband physically abused her

[walfredo 2]

Abuse isnt just physical. Controlling behavior of her spouse certainly qualifies as 'abuse' (psychological). Abuse is completely about controlling someone, whether that be through physical means or in this case, through the fact that her husband has power and control over her due to her immigrantion situation.

Whether or not that qualifies under VAWA is a different matter, but the point is, there are resources out there, and people she can contact for help.

Edited June 4, 2014 by walfredo

[Darnell 8,479]

Hi all! Its my first time posting here and I'm new to the forum. I need a,little advice on my situation which I'll make really short because the long version will be too long. Married my husband almost 2 years now, out of good faith, trusting he was "the one". Before I married him I had a,great career and beautiful life, I was promised things can only get better. I was in love,so I trusted him. Basically he's made me spend all my savings,left me with an apartment and bills,in our name I can't afford, given me anxiety, racked up hospital bills because of my anxiety. He also moved out and tries to pop in and,out of my life as he chooses and when ever I mention divorce he's threatened me, begged me don't leave because he knows how much I love him so I always,take him back then he comes for a,short time and goes back to the road (he is,a,trucker) and doesn't take my calls for months at a,time. Recently he's had multiple women messaging me and telling me to leave him alone saying they're sleeping with him. he says that he doesn't know if I will leave him if he gives me my green card ECT. I married this man out of pure love, he's destroyed my life,I would like to go back to my home country but if I do then I won't be able to come back to the USA, my line of work requires me to travel all over including the USA, my fiance visa is long expired. I just don't know what to do.

Since it 'sounds' like you two (or him)

filed for Adjustment of Status on you -

I suggest you chase down the adjustment of status receipt numbers and then

chase down your status with USCIS via telephone -

starting first with a telephone call into USCIS - talk with a CSR - giving over the receipt #s and asking about status.

then write back here what you learned about your filing status.

I suggest this - as it's a point in a major decision tree - your exact status.

[affie 1]

He basically filed all forms for green card, only thing left to do was send in forms and I told the lawyer not to because he wasn't taking my calls. And no he did not physically abuse me but he has caused me anxiety and has women texting me and harassing me, I think its very stressful and its,stressing me out a great deal. He sends me messages randomly and comes then disappears, that's cruel beyond belief.

[belinda63 3,041]

I don't see VAWA here. Nothing that is extremely cruel or abusive. Having affairs and leaving the home is not abuse, it's a part of marriage when the marriage doesn't work.

[Darnell 8,479]

He basically filed all forms for green card, only thing left to do was send in forms and I told the lawyer not to because he wasn't taking my calls. And no he did not physically abuse me but he has caused me anxiety and has women texting me and harassing me, I think its very stressful and its,stressing me out a great deal. He sends me messages randomly and comes then disappears, that's cruel beyond belief.

ok - help me to understand? here's some language that I know.

fill a form - write in a form

file a form - send form off to USCIS.

so this 'send in forms' never occured - right? if not send in forms - uscis knows nothing about you.

[affie 1]

I meant filled out forms, and what if the lawyer sends in the forms and he does not show up for interview then what?

[affie 1]

I don't see VAWA here. Nothing that is extremely cruel or abusive. Having affairs and leaving the home is not abuse, it's a part of marriage when the marriage doesn't work.

how do you mean? The marriage does not work? He keeps telling me not to divorce him, he finds his way to me to beg me not to let him go, he knows I have no money to do it anyway, I have severe anxiety, he's sent messages threatening me not to divorce him else I'll end up missing. I mean how isn't that cruelty? The fact that I left my career and he has me im a situation where I'm without money and im anxious about everything and I've even contemplated suicide isn't cruel???

[belinda63 3,041]

So why do you let him keep coming back? Sounds like you are only one on a list of women he has.

1. Do you want a divorce?

2. What do you want to do?

[tehans 52]

While the OP's husband is a real jerk I don't see anything that would qualify as VAWA material.