The other side of deportation: An American struggles to prepare for life without husband

[JohnR! 5,495]

By the sound of it his case is much more complicated, it would seem that a US judge did not find evidence of his relationship compelling for a start.

And the appeals begin... It will be interesting to see how this plays out...

Crying myself to sleep wishing my wife was with me and thinking about getting put into "administrative processing" for years after our interview at the embassy usually does the trick for me, but thanks for asking.

Chances are you and Madina do have something in common after all. My heart goes out to both of you.

[Avery Cates 1,141]

Crying myself to sleep wishing my wife was with me and thinking about getting put into "administrative processing" for years after our interview at the embassy usually does the trick for me, but thanks for asking.

Worst case, there's like a 40/60 chance of that happening.

The thing that always bothers me about articles like this is there's no personal responsibility taken at any point. It's the big dastardly government that's separating people. It's not the deportee's fault for overstaying illegally the terms of their visa. The partner has no responsibility for knowingly getting in a relationship with someone here illegally, and knowing from the get go that they have the potential to be deported. It's not the deportee's fault that they not only broke the law by staying illegally, but also breaking the law in other ways that led to their deportation proceedings, in this case being a very real danger posed to the community by a drunken driver. Government's fault though, right?

A danger to the community and lawbreaker is being removed, and to that I say "good." She has the option to go with her husband, or work toward it. They have the option to look into a 3rd country. Being deported is like last call at a bar. "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here." But it's not their fault that they're not looking into other options, and perhaps understanding that this is at the very least completely the result of the doing of one of them, amirite?

[r060106 109]

Worst case, there's like a 40/60 chance of that happening.

The thing that always bothers me about articles like this is there's no personal responsibility taken at any point. It's the big dastardly government that's separating people. It's not the deportee's fault for overstaying illegally the terms of their visa. The partner has no responsibility for knowingly getting in a relationship with someone here illegally, and knowing from the get go that they have the potential to be deported. It's not the deportee's fault that they not only broke the law by staying illegally, but also breaking the law in other ways that led to their deportation proceedings, in this case being a very real danger posed to the community by a drunken driver. Government's fault though, right?

A danger to the community and lawbreaker is being removed, and to that I say "good." She has the option to go with her husband, or work toward it. They have the option to look into a 3rd country. Being deported is like last call at a bar. "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here." But it's not their fault that they're not looking into other options, and perhaps understanding that this is at the very least completely the result of the doing of one of them, amirite?

Quoted for Truth. Well said.

[Amy and Michael 21]

I feel bad for any person or family that is having a hard time - whether they are dealing with immigration issues, financial issues, health issues, etc. But, the truth is, we never knew how many opportunities they had to take a better path, or make a better decision, etc. I mean, I deal with health issues - some I could have prevented/delayed. If someone is struggling financially - did they make wise decisions during their eduction, during their careers, during their relationships?? Etc. etc.

When I first met my now husband, I had no idea about immigration. But, I researched it. I knew quickly there was a right way, and an illegal way.

With this article, and in many other times we hear a story we never hear ALL the details. How many times did this couple shrug at the right way and choose the easy way? We will never know. It is still tough to read.

I always find it tough to just share endless sympathy, though - when most of us see clearly many different things where they chose not to take the "right" road - which is often the harder road.

[nadia&sameer 12]

Why can't she live with him in Bangladesh?

[belinda63 3,041]

Just a story of irresponsibility and lack of knowledge. No one to blame but themselves. He was here without authorization and she knew this. He committed crimes and as I said before it had to be more than a simple single DUI that the story mentions. They never looked into their options but were content to let him remain here illegally because so many other people do it. He, for whatever reason, is now being deported and we are supposed to feel sorry for them and blame the big, bad government because these people broke the law. I wish I could break the law and call the newspaper and have the story spun so my crimes were the fault of the government.

[chrisx1024 3]

Oy vey....

You can assume a lot when you don't know the full story. Speculation can be so titillating...

Edited May 28, 2014 by chrisx1024

[Glyn and Kathy 288]

While I do feel for them both, why do people think their actions have no consequences? He CHOSE to stay when he shouldn't have. He CHOSE to drive under the influence. They chose to ignore the law and now its coming back to bite them in the butt. Now they have to deal with those choices. Again, I do feel for them, anyone who has been separated from their loved ones would, but again...they've no one to blame but themselves.

[Avery Cates 1,141]

He committed crimes and as I said before it had to be more than a simple single DUI that the story mentions.

Even if that was the only thing, that's enough. The past 3 weekends without fail, a drunk driver from out of town has killed someone in this town.

[belinda63 3,041]

Even if that was the only thing, that's enough. The past 3 weekends without fail, a drunk driver from out of town has killed someone in this town.

Ya, I said in an earlier post it must have been a DUI with serious bodily injury or death or multiple DUIs. One simple DUI (without other issues) does not lead to deportation. There is more to this story.

[dwheels76 5,468]

I still don't understand why this woman who says she paid all this many to lawyers never filed nothing AOS or otherwise for her husband. Something is screwy. I have a few friends who's husbands and wives were here overstay and even illegally in deportation proceedings they filed for them and got green cards for them. One even petitioned his children and they got their green card before dad.

So I am confused. I wish they would tell the whole story. Why in proceedings. A DUI doesn't do that? And again why a lawyer wouldn't advise "woman you need to AOS immediately". Like What the what?

[dragon2284 1]

I'm not sorry. He was here long enough to do the legal steps to stay. We who are going through the legal visa steps know all to well... how life is without our spouses and loved ones. If you don't want to be separated and /or deported, come here legally. Or take the steps offered to you to stay legally. I am not sorry for someone who broke the law.

[thedude6752000 360]

I'm not sorry. He was here long enough to do the legal steps to stay. We who are going through the legal visa steps know all to well... how life is without our spouses and loved ones. If you don't want to be separated and /or deported, come here legally. Or take the steps offered to you to stay legally. I am not sorry for someone who broke the law.

Hear hear! This x10000000000000000000000000000000000

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

See what you started, Ewok?

There's little true understanding in this crowd.

[Glyn and Kathy 288]

I don't think its a matter of not understanding. I understand perfectly. He came here legally. Liked it and stayed. He then broke the law. He got caught and now he's being deported. His wife is going to miss him (been there myself) he is going to miss her (hubby's been there) and now they have to try to find a way to be together (again been there and done that) because the way they've been doing it hasn't worked because it wasn't done properly. They've got some work to do to be together...work they should have done ages ago. He's had the money to do it if he was making 60,000 and she has been working. Why they haven't is anyone's guess, I agree with others above that something is missing from the story as to why they couldn't AOS.