Getting used to the states

[JamalNTam 1]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

[Dwarf_Ogress 0]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

Which state are you in? I am in Arizona and I have had sisters who married black men and had children. My family and I rarely recieved any negativity about being bi-racial or mixed. The thing is you nip a problem in the bud when it occurs and usually it works itself out. I was in Jamaica and I was the only white woman for miles. People were constantly shouting both negative and positive things at me. It all boils down to realizing that some people are ignorant and blow them off. Obviously they are not too important to your life so why care what others think? I agree that it is frustrating but if you look at the US now compared to the past, bi-racial couples are more of the norm now.

[^snow^^ 0]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

It really depends on which area of the States. I am of Chinese descent (but from Malaysia) and staying in Bay Area, CA. Over here, there's at least 30% Asian population and it isn't so obvious to me how different this is from home. However, when I visit my in-laws in Indiana, I get all sorts of weird looks and even had someone talk to my husband as if I don't understand English!

[Mags 112]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

I think you were in a very exceptional area in the UK to say there was no racism. When I lived in the UK there was always items on the news about racial disharmony.

I think you will find that the USA has areas just like the UK. In some areas people of all races mix, in others they are more segregated. In the UK alot of the races CHOOSE to keep themselves away from other races, they can be very secular.

If you move to the back of beyond, where people of races other than white are the majority, you are going to have more of a reaction, simply because they are not used to it. Move to the middle of NY and people won't bat an eyelid.

FYI, there are many places in the UK where being in a mixed relationship will bring you abuse too.

[tom&tata 2]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

We do not live in big city and the only "racist" comment that my wife got was from a 3 yo niece who asked if she speaks spanish - hardly anything racist about that .

Of course, we occasionally have people look at us when we walk to the store together, but nothing nasty. The bigger the city, the less people care about the mixed race relationship. They see it everyday !

[MrsBruce5 0]

Hi...

It appears to me that some people will be ignorant no matter where they are from. The smaller the town, the less diversity. People tend to only be aware of what is their "norm". Sad, but true...

I have to say-I have found more intolerance in the UK than I do here. Not only with races, but with ethnicity as well.

I have been on the back end of this intolerance in the UK. I was especially surprised by the looks I got simply walking down the street with my husband in his town simply because my hair is black and my skin is olive colored. My husband lived in a very small part of town and basically everyone looks like a cookie cutter of each other. If you look different, or dress differently-you tend to get looks and hear comments. While I was there, I was even called some very unkind names there as well. It was shortly after the London bombings, and I understand that people may have been tense-but still-it's no excuse for ignorance and stupidity-which sadly, is everywhere in the world.

[Muuuuah 0]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

I dont believe that it is any different from England at all...we are in the states and we have not had any problems....i have lived in a lot of different places in England and i could take you to or tell you some real bad places for racism (and i know what i am talking about, my son is mixed race). I think that you are just lucky to live somewhere where people mix alot. There are good and places in all countries for any number of things

[JelloShotGirl 0]

yeah depends what region of the states ur in. Unfortunately there is a lot of racism ingrained into our culture . It is really sad but just ignore those people, cause they are idiots. I know it can be very hard. I have been thru it. It is not easy being an interracial couple even here in new york.

[Em&Ed 0]

When I had to fill out the form for the SSN it was the first time ever I had to fill out what race I was. I just thought it was so weird. My husband just told me to get used to it because that's what it is like in this country.....race matters. We are also an interracial couple -me milk, he chocolate- and although I really don't pay attention to stares etc, my husband sometimes points things out to me that I simply don't notice.

[TonyS 0]

All excellent responses! Makes my heart feel good. I have been in several mixed relationships. I think the diiferences in all of us make us wonderful and unique. Like a ice cream shop with many flavors. You two know who you are, that is most important. This is a big country and you will find cities/regions with different views. Hang in there, we are getting better in America.

Tony

[Identity 0]

I'm only visitng here at the moment while I wait for my visa to be approved but the one thing thats really starting to show, one which I dont like is the segregation between races and cultures. In England I mix with everyone and I am used to environments where all races hang together and there isnt a thought about racism and things like that. My fiance has told me there is a lot of racism still in the states (he is african american) and I have been told that being in a mixed relationship out here is different than it is in England. It's really starting to frustrate me as I wish that people would just forget about race and accept other people for just being people, not the color of their skin. Obviously im not sayin everyone is like this - but it does seem more apparent here than where im from xx

Some people may say, "where in England did you live?" From my experience, the blacks don't like the whites, the Pakis hate everyone, and be careful who you label a terrorist when talking to anyone from Northern Ireland.

Then, in America, there's this kind of racism.

[KarenCee 3]

I live in the Deep South and lemme tell ya...in some places here it's as if everyone is stuck in a frickin time warp! Still stuck in the days of white supremacy and segregation. Unbelievable!

I agree with the one who said nip it in the bud the *minute* it occurs. If it happens and people know where you stand it might make things easier. It's ridiculous that this STILL occurs here in the 21st century.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Sorry to say it is a fact of happening everywhere you look, to bad to because that judgement may cost them the best friend they would have ever known.

[Chris-n-Veronica 0]

I can't imagine there isn't racism in England.. maybe they aren't as vocal about it..

But it's everywhere... Some places less then others.. I would just be myself and let people see that your different then the ones that give us a bad name..(notice how I said US..thats because someone is giving US a bad name too)

My Mom was in a relationship for years with a God help me with current reference hahhaahha well a Black man..he was a great guy!!

Alot of my nieces are married to hispanic's ..So this is very common in my area...and it's only those small few that hurt the rest.. So just prove yourself..ignore them..and be happy.. Everyone see racism at one time or another..no matter if your white..black..Brown.. male or female.....

[deathbydalbhat 0]

Probably the closest place in America to a racial Utopia is Hawai'i where I grew up. I believe there are more mixed race couples than same-race couples. No staring. Everybody is 'chop suey' or 'poi dog' a little of this a little of that. My high school boyfriend was Cambodian and ever since then I have dated guys from just about every race with no problems. Unfortunately while interracial relationships are common, racial 'issues' are also very common - not so much outright conflict but more subtle stereotyping and assumptions which can happen anywhere I guess. There is some low grade friction between newly arrived 'haole'(white) and Asian-Pacific 'locals', but in my experience it is more about attitude and behavior(brash and obnoxious vs. self-effacing and humble) rather than race per se.