PLEASE HELP , I NEED HELP

[sara82 4]

Please taake care of YOU, first, as no one else will. Just remember this could "get out of hand" and he could seriously hurt you, physically.

Stay away from him.,.,and please, take care of yourself first, a "no one else will".,.,.,.,

I would assume you are filipino, guessing, as I see no "time line" information posted on this site. My wife is Filipino, and the most wonderful womaan in the world to me!

Yes, I am lucky, my prayers are for your situation to get much better, with hon or WITHOUT HIM, men hitting women is unacceptable!

she is so lucky to have husband like you,

from long time ago , i have not heard from him, nice words , like i 'm wonderful, or something , i"m happy its over

Edited April 27, 2014 by sara82

[Leatherneck 693]

Thank you

i have a question , whats happened today will stay in his police record, i mean they know one day that he has beaten his wife,?

Yes, he has a permanent arrest record unless the case gets dismissed by a judge or not charged by the district attorney. In San Diego county -- they will not dismiss or fail to prosecute the case.

San Diego county is very aggressive about domestic violence cases.

If convicted or if he pleads guilty, there will be a permanent record of the conviction. Provided someday he does not get the record expunged -- however, that is another story for another time.

Edited April 27, 2014 by Leatherneck

[sara82 4]

Yes, he has a permanent arrest record unless the case gets dismissed by a judge or not charged by the district attorney. In San Diego county -- they will not dismiss or fail to prosecute the case.

San Diego county is very aggressive about domestic violence cases.

If convicted or if he pleads guilty, there will be a permanent record of the conviction. Provided someday he does not get the record expunged -- however, that is another story for another time.

thank you , you did a great help

[Cathi 5,748]

Please taake care of YOU, first, as no one else will. Just remember this could "get out of hand" and he could seriously hurt you, physically.

Stay away from him.,.,and please, take care of yourself first, a "no one else will".,.,.,.,

I would assume you are filipino, guessing, as I see no "time line" information posted on this site. My wife is Filipino, and the most wonderful womaan in the world to me!

Yes, I am lucky, my prayers are for your situation to get much better, with hon or WITHOUT HIM, men hitting women is unacceptable!

she isn't Filipino, she is Moroccan

[Cathi 5,748]

Sara, don't worry about his record, he brought this situation on himself. I know you care about him still, but you are moving on. Look at your inbox.

[Leatherneck 693]

thank you , you did a great help

You're welcome.

His arrest record and how this case gets settled is for him to be concerned with now. You focus on taking care of you and doing what is best for your physical, emotional, and mental well being. You are your first priority now.

[Cathi 5,748]

Sara, please stay safe.

Don't be the next victim like this young woman, very sad story.

http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2014/01/01/22138477-woman-dies-in-michigan-as-iran-family-weeps-while-watching-over-internet?chromedomain=worldnews

I remember when this happened. This was the perfect example to give Sara, so many similarities. After personally speaking to Sara I can tell you she is a very special, kind, sweet, intelligent woman who deserves a life free from a man who physically and verbally abuses her.

[sara82 4]

thanks to everybody , i'm going to have some rest now if i can have some, feel tired, i couldn't talk to the Assistance centers tonight , because i found very great help here, , i will ask tomorrow if they can offer to me a psychologist, and counselor, i need to speak in person to someone, what i will do is clear now because of the help of the family i have in VJ , i'm just in chock because between one night and other everything in my life changed without prior warning

after a couple of hours i will be back to let you know what happens

[Ortolan 381]

Mimolicious that was very kind of you. Bravo to you for helping so much! Sara82, I hope the best for you, and hope for some peace and resolution for you.

Edited April 27, 2014 by SuzAug

[SingleDad2usc 71]

So hopefully, by now, you've changed your mind about what you said in below quote

I TOLD THE POLICE HE INVERSTIGATE with me , that i forgive him , i dont want him to go to jail , im musulmane it never happened in our society something like that, i told them where they were in the house i just want him to never violence me again, but now in my situation do you mean it illegal for me to stay around him , that means i have to find place where i will live ? or he can come back home ?, i wanted to call them to tell them if there is possibility to speak to him , but i think this is not allowed , i never wanted to get divorced now

you have to make 2 choices:

1. Do you want him convicted of the crime

2. Do you want to self-petition for permanent residency status in the U.S.

Assuming both are YES, you should save these copies:

1. When you sign for the Prosecutor that you're willing to testify, ask for a copy of what you signed. Make sure you have police report as well

2. Before he visits (with police escort) to collect whatever of his belongings that he can throw into his car, make sure you've made copies of his proof of citizenship, all of your documents, all of your joint paperwork (bank statements, letters addressed to both of you, insurance, tax returns, leases)

Remember: if he removes all these documents, including the original of Marriage Certificate, then you may not be able to self-petition to USCIS

Edited April 27, 2014 by SingleDad2usc

[belinda63 3,038]

She already has her green card. No need for a VAWA filing or a U-visa filing.

[SingleDad2usc 71]

I didn't see OP mention Green Card. That makes the situation easier. Then her priority is permanent Protective Order and divorce (hopefully, on her terms)

Edited April 27, 2014 by SingleDad2usc

[Karam and Jamie 44]

Sara, it seems in MOST situations people who hit other people (especially a husband hitting a wife) will not stop doing this just because he says sorry and says he will change. I am so sorry you are in this situation. Is there any way you can just go back to your family? It may seem like a touch decision but in all honesty, if you stay here you will just continue to be abused and if you stay you will have to figure out what you are going to do like living in a shelter. You should tell any family you can and see if they can help you go home. That is my advice. He will not stop treating you this way.

[SingleDad2usc 71]

I'm again lost: why shelter? If OP has green card, is housing unattainable?

In the near month, before the accused batterer had his day in court, he's prevented by full restraining order to show up at their house (other than one visit to collect his belongings with police escort only)

[Novembro 1,763]

Well done mimo

Good luck, Sara!