Confounded

[Hotter Otter 1,211]

One half of your union or his relatives might still be a slave here in the Southern U.S. if more nobler minded people had not overcome in the Civil War through accelerated "quibbling". Change does not come through acquiescence, and you are not authorized to prohibit my exercise of free speech during my search for solutions. If you do not like me or my thoughts is it necessary that you pay any further attention to me? Is there a charge for the pages this thread is occupying? If so, state the amount I owe to the webmasters. Otherwise, I have received some good and friendly advice and would enjoy continued interaction with those that would encourage me.

Everyday on VJ there is at least one post that makes me go today it is yours.

Good luck with your lady though

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

"Free speech" doesn't apply to privately owned message boards. You can say what you like here as long as it abides by the terms of the TOS. Others can also respond to you in ways that may oppose your posts as long as they abide by the terms of the TOS. It's give and take.

But, as some friendly advice, I would recommend that as a recent joiner you might tone down the rhetoric. First, it alienates potential allies and helpful people who have meaningful advice. Second, this process costs what it costs, and takes as long as it takes. It's not a money making venture, and it isn't intended to torture people. It's an imperfect system, but it does a decent job most of the time. Lastly, bringing a relative to the States is a privilege, not a right, and can be helpful to remember this. We are free to marry whom we choose (with a few restrictions) but the US is not obligated to allow the entry of any non-US citizen. Please take what I say in the manner I intend it -- not as criticism, but as advice. I can see this thread already beginning to spin out of control and it needn't.

[AKukreti 24]

Im Jealous...I wish I was in Texas and my fiance was in Mexico. Or I stay in Jersey and my fiance was in Canada...but nope...I have to travel far far away because they wouldn't even let him here on a tourist visa...ugh...

[Boiler 45,525]

This could be God telling you that he wants you to go to her rather than her go to you.

God works in mysterious ways.

[TAB2TAB 52]

JON AND SOL: "Yeah, sorry about if the Dan Savage reference was oblique to you. I sometimes erroneously assume that whatever informs my beliefs must be what informs everyone's beliefs."

Jon and Sol, as much as I enjoyed your first reference to Dan Savage, you outdid yourself on your second post, which I suspect will be received even more obliquely than the first. From my vantage point, your last sentence may be the single most exquisitely ironic post I have ever seen on VJ.

Therefore, by the power vested in me, I thusly present you with a full 10 out of 10 points.

[Denawhitemd 1]

First, to all the critics, it absolutely is possible to fall in love online and end up in a lasting relationship. But unfortunately, everyone here is correct - as far as I know, there is no way to get around the rule. I wish I could say there is but too many sham marriages in the past have made it impossible now.

And FYI DJ&L, you clearly have no clue about the size of Texas and Mexico. When I lived in Texas, it took nearly as long to get to some parts of Mexico as it does for me to get to England now. Not to mention, summer flights to Mexico can be prohibitively expensive due to all the vacationers this time of year.

[Denawhitemd 1]

Thank you for your interest. She and I have discussed the option of her coming on a tourist visa and may pursue it. We also discussed marrying in Mexico and her living with me for 6 months during the waiting period on a tourist visa. Then back to Mexico until the green card comes. But then as these options unfold so does the money needed for all of that pile up.

Be carful here. Once you are married, she will no longer be able to travel to the USA as a visitor. If you marry in Mexico, she will have to stay there until her CR-1 visa is approved.

Edited April 26, 2014 by Denawhitemd

[JnRMo 16]

As far as being able to sponsor, I think my regular job will slide in under the wire having looked at the charts on the USCIS web-site. I do not know how the Gallery will perform as to income nor whether the USCIS will even consider it as a liability or an asset. Also don't know if they will consider her rent income from Mexico.

I don't know how you've set up your gallery business - my guess is it would probably be considered a hobby at this stage, even if your intent is to make a profit, and that may eventually be the case:

http://www.irs.gov/uac/Business-or-Hobby%3F-Answer-Has-Implications-for-Deductions

http://www.irs.gov/uac/Is-Your-Hobby-a-For-Profit-Endeavor%3F

Your concern is likely to be how your income is reflected on your taxes - does it meet the threshold for 3 people?

Unsure about her rental income - but my assumption is no - that part of the process focuses on your income/earnings. Also - I believe you said she WOULD rent her place out when she moves - it is not currently rented so probably couldn't be used if this was even allowable.

[Avery Cates 1,141]

Never in all my wildest imagination would I ever have thought getting married to a foreigner would be so maddeningly complicated. Intuition would mandate that marriage is sacred and the very state of being married would guarantee certain inalienable rights. Not so with this insanely intricate process. The more I read, here and on the USCIS site and other sites, the more confused and confounded I become as to where to even start.

My girlfriend lives in Mexico. I am a natural U.S. citizen living in Texas. She has one child, a daughter who is 9 years old. We met on a faith-based web-site and fell in love after using email, phone, and other video-chat services to regularly communicate.

She is a widow and receives a pension, which I understand will cease when she leaves Mexico. She has a home from which she can collect rent when she leaves Mexico to live here with me in Texas. I have put all my money and effort into rennovating and sustaining a Studio/Gallery for my Artwork in the hopes of getting it opened as a sideline to being a lead maintenance man for a small property corporation. We are wanting her to work in the Gallery while I continue to hold down my maintenance job and create art after hours and on weekends.

Because of the investment in the Gallery, which began before we met, I have absolutely no money to go visit her once or even twice before we marry with a Fiance Visa. By the same token, going to Mexico to marry her is prohibitively expensive as well.

Thinking about applying for a Work Visa for her makes me nervous that we would be charged with fraud if we marry while she is here working in my Gallery.

It appears like there is no solution at all to me, and I have no idea where to start. Have I given enough details about our situation for any vets here to offer some beneficial advice?

Thanks so much for any help you can offer!

You need to save your pennies and meet. There's no way around that. You will also never get a work visa for her, because they have many restrictions and requirements and you don't meet them in this situation.

No matter the relationship, you should spend a good amount of real time together before getting married or even considering it.

Not meaning any disrespect as another vet has accused me of, but the whole process does not seem to favor the poor.

It does not, thankfully. We have enough poor as it is, we don't need to be willing importing more.

Thank you! What a golden nugget of information. I take from your adivice that we should list her house as the asset ( which itself can be sold and liquidated = the importance in the eyes of the USCIS ), and not the income form the rent. A follow up to this would be: will the assets' ( house's ) value be factored in against the 2014 HHS Poverty Guidelines?

USCIS only cares about your income and assets, as you need to prove that you meet the guidelines for the I-134 and I-864. Her assets and/or income do not matter at all in this equation.

Change does not come through acquiescence, and you are not authorized to prohibit my exercise of free speech during my search for solutions.

Free speech doesn't apply to private venues for forums. Don't be that guy. No one likes that guy.

[Kolewenoik31 57]

I hear you about the bible account. That said, this is the year 2014 & your body happens to reside in the United States of America, where there are rules. And if you want to marry someone who is not already legally inside the United States of America, then you must play their game. And rule #1 for K-1 is must have met in person. It's fine if your faith transcends bonds of flesh. But your own flesh is bound by law to meet certain requirements. No one in the forum can change that. We just speak from experience.

Please forgive me...But when I read this post I was in need of a good laugh and thanks to your flip it way of commenting I got what I needed. Thank you for your sense of humour you are so funny, but all that you are saying is true. I to did not know how I would ever met my husband, but God provided a way. I have to admit...it was hard work and no money. But I was able to raise it. I wish my husband lived as close as Mexico. I would be there once a month. Op they are write in their advise maybe a little sarcastic and maybe not. They are pointing you in the right direction. K-1 proof that you have met once in 2 yrs. CR-1 proof of marriage either way a face to face is the only way. We are playing their game! BTW Op you have not even begun to play the game...wait until after filing there is when the caraziness!!! will begin. Day after day after day of waiting....

[Ontarkie 14,227]

~~Inappropriate posts removed, post constructively or do not post~~

[christeen 966]

Even attempting to garner a work visa through your business would be much more expensive and cumbersome than saving a little here and there to go for a visit. If you have a credit card, maybe charge the trip,then you can pay it off in little bits... Falling in love is expensive, falling in love with someone in a foreign country is REALLY expensive... But I will say, a trip to mexico to meet is waaaayyy less in cost than the fees for the process... Travel to foreign lands is a luxury not a basic human right... And you have to,pay for,that luxury...

[QueenComley 295]

ThomVIII I am so sorry for your predicament.

Me and my (now) husband spoke and emailed daily for around 9 months before I finally flew to the states to see him for 2 weeks. It was only by a stroke of luck that we managed to come up with the air-fair as my husband got an unexpected Christmas bonus in his pay check and he spent it on a ticket for me to come visit.

When I returned to England I gave up my home, moved in with my parents to save money for the cost of the visa process, Gave up my permanent job in HR to free me up for further visits, and got a temping job as a PA to give me flexibility to travel when I wanted but to also be earning and saving.

My husband had 2 children to support, rent to pay, gas, food and utilities all on one lonesome pay check. On top of that he was spending nearly $200 a month on international phone cards. We had no idea how we would fund my second vacation to see him.

Luckily my father-in-law supported us from the start and messaged me one morning to say he would fund any further trips, which he did. twice. We were very blessed and very lucky. But even with my air fair paid for, me and my husband were still making lots of financial sacrifices for this whole process.

Although some of the responses here seem a little harsh, in essence the advice offered is just plain simple facts. You do have to meet in person. You do have to find a way to fund a trip. Ask a member of your family to loan you the money for a plane ticket, get a loan, apply for a credit card, do anything to ensure a way to meet with your love and start the whole process rolling. The financial sacrifice, in the end, is so worth it. Every single member on VJ has been through it, struggled an found a way. So will you.

I wish you lots and lots of luck

[QueenComley 295]

I would also like to add, please keep your faith in god. Its so important. What is meant to be will be. good luck

Edited April 26, 2014 by QueenComley

[calvm 10]

A minor technical clarification - Work visa is a dual intent visa so there is no fraud here. However the bar for H1B is high from a perspective of job qualification match etc.. and it's already closed out for this year.

So, you haven't met in person and you're asking how to get your girlfriend here, so you can marry her, without meeting the requirements of a K1 visa? (Just so I understand)

If that's the case....

Your excuses for not having the time and money to visit are all well and good but the good ol' USCIS doesn't care. You need to have met once prior to filing for a K1. Period. End of discussion. Your gallery and such are not material to the discussion.

It's too expensive to get married in Mexico (and you don't have the time to meet her) so you can't file for a CR-1.

You know all this...which is why you're considering visa fraud and bringing her here on a work visa. I'd advise against that.

Just to put it plain....you're in Texas. She's in Mexico. It's not like she's halfway around the world. It's a three hour plane flight or less probably. Go meet her.

Don't complain about the system when you clearly have no respect for it.