Blues

[addy 0]

I was talking to my baby this evening but I did most of the talking. He didn't talk much. I kept asking if he was all right and he would assure me yeah. I would continue telling him about my day but when I ask how his day went, he'd go meh. I finally asked if he has the addy blues and he would be silent so I guessed correctly. I tell him how much I love him and miss him so much. He knows I'm planning to be with him in July and I hope December but my poor man just stays quiet. He means everything to me and I would have nothing if I didn't have him. I think I got him feeling better but now I'm deep in the blues. I'm applying for jobs this week and I have to keep telling myself I will be there in July. I couldn't afford it last year. I pray this year will be different. I miss him so badly.

[MichelleandCraig 1]

Aw, Addy...we've all been there. The 'missing you blues' really hurts. I know everyone says keep busy, you'll be together soon, do your own 'thang' to pass the time...and they're all right, too. On the other hand,sometimes you just have to feel down for a little bit and get it all out..vent, etc. Sometimes a good old crying jag can do wonders, as long as you don't let yourself stay down there for *too* long. Take care, and take heart...you'll make it, and so will he. It's just...hard. M.

[JanaknJanet 0]

Sorry your down.. heads up.. .. but I think something is definaetly in the air..

If i hear ok fine one more time.. or . myself holding 89% of the conversation.. and his response is a simple ok.. i think i will scream... What is it with guys.. especially in this situation... we are both having the same difficulties... not just them.. grrrrr... .

Hope you and your honey get together soon.. or at least calls clear up... ..

I think Jan needs to be in the dog house a bit more.. aughhh.. do they ever understand?

[rebeccajo 14]

Wow, you two have been at this a while, haven't you (just read your profile)!

I know you're used to being apart, but maybe it's time to take this to the next level?

I REALLY have no idea and I'm not being judgmental- honest! But it's my experience that every relationship has it's 'turning points' and maybe you two are there.

I read that you wouldn't mind living in Wales. Time to consider that? I visited the UK a while back and found it lovely.........

Hang in there....and good luck!

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Being apart stinks...no matter how much sugar you pour on it.

[TracyTN 237]

Awww *hugs* Addy, my friend. You and Dan have been through a lot - you're gonna have down times every now and then. Another vacation together is a good thing to work towards. Do your best to focus on that. Its not much, but sometimes, its all we have to keep us going.

[addy 0]

The good news is he is feeling much better. He talked a lot more and was in a happy mood.

The bad news is, I didn't get the job that was offering the work visa. Now I am depressed.

Umm Tracy? Who is in your new avatar?

[addy 0]

Ok. Now I have a bit more time.

For the new year, I am determined to get a new job and earn enough to pay all of my credit debts and any doctor debts as well. I have a lump growing on my thyroid. I had a checkup today and the doctor says I'm doing well and it hasn't grown. The tests he sends me to though can be pricey.

Anyhow, I applied to two jobs already. It'll take time until I hear from the first company. This second company, I found them in the newspaper and I went to their website to fill out an application, answer any questions and take a short test they include. The position was for inbound customer service and I have done that type of work for about 5-6 years including clerical work. The paper said to fill out info in the site and then attend the job fair, which was today, so there would be a good chance for immediate hire.

I went today and after getting some directions finding the place, I filled out information and waited..amd waited...and waited. It was about 1pm when they were deciding not to interview anymore until 4pm but they changed their minds and finally I was called in. After going through the niceties, they saw the position I wanted and told me the job was filled. What really bugs me is that they gave me a paper to fill out when I got there and check off what position I wanted and that position was there. I was disappointed but they said if there was another job I liked, I would have to go online, which means driving home again, fill out info, and then wait until they call you for an interview. This company isn't exactly close to where I live and I already wasted enough on petrol to go through that again. I just thanked them and left.

I've been pretty depressed about it because I haven't had a full time job in almost two years. Temporary jobs are #######. Time will fly by and when July arrives, I don't want to be jobless and too poor to afford my trip to wales.

[rebeccajo 14]

Addy, is it imperative that you and your man live in the US? By that I guess I mean - is it your goal as a couple?

I see by your photos that you are a young couple. My husband and I are in our forties (well - I'll be fifty this summer but - lol - nevermind) and we chose to live in the US only because of my son. I own a home here but my job is not stable - he rented a home but had a stable job.

I guess all I'm saying is that while you are young, you have more choices. Before you have babies.

At the end of the day, my husband and I often conjecture that it might have been better to have lived in the UK. We feel that the social support system and the public transport are pluses. Plus the pace of life is less frantic.

Take a good look at your circumstances. Maybe there's a job for you in Wales? I really have no idea what the employment picture is like in that part of the UK, or what housing costs are.

This is just my opinion from this side of the visajourney. One nice thing about being from two countries - you CAN choose where you want to live and be together!!

[VetsWife328 7]

Oh yeah,I know exactly what it fels like !!!!!!!

My man and I haven't seen each other for 3 months now and he told me on Monday that he's slowly going insane....I can tell that he's just about to get the blues again.........and everytime he does it hits me too.

Now I'm not saying it's easier on me,but I'm trying NOT to think of how many months we'll still be apart.I'm trying to focus on the very next step.(In our case that the papers are FINALLY served to her and our 90 day divorce contdown starts,should have 2 1/2 months ago but for some reason she can't be served.........).

I will fly to the US for his divorce and we will put our I 129 F in while I'm there,so then I will be focusing on the first and then the second NoA..............

It's more than hard to sit in two different countries having to wait and wait and wait.And having to deal with all the problems life brings pretty much on your own.The one in the otrher country can't do much but listen to you........and whenever they have a bad day -you have a bad day.......My man used to not talk to me for weeks at a time when he had the blues,until it got to the point where I almost gave up on us.Then someone told me how depressed he (my man) really is and that nothing in the world can make him smile or motivate him and that friend of his told me to get on a plane and come to the US.And I swear from the second he knew I was coming (and he knew that about 6 weeks before I actually got there) he was happy and energetic.

As I said it is a terrible,sad and heartbreaking situation but in the end it only makes our relationship/marriage so much stronger.If we all wouldn't honestly and truly love our SO's then why would we think they're worth waiting for and going through all this heartache??

All of us will one day be together again and we here on VJ know what it means to be seperated while all you really want is to be together.

So to all of you that have the blues ,think of that someone special in that othe country who loves you and thinks you're worth waiting for.Think of how strong and true a relationship has to be to survive this!!!!

Nat

[TracyTN 237]

The good news is he is feeling much better. He talked a lot more and was in a happy mood.

The bad news is, I didn't get the job that was offering the work visa. Now I am depressed.

Umm Tracy? Who is in your new avatar?

Why that'd be the one and only Dave Gilmour!!

Rebecca, I believe Addy is planning to move to Wales to be with her sweetie. At least I believe that is still the plan.

[addy 0]

Oh yes. I'll be moving to Wales with him. We had a talk about who wants to live in which country. I voted either way. Dan is more happier in wales because most of the shops and restaurants in my area are far away and require a drive. I've been to wales three times already and know his family. I had an accident when I was there last time and his mum took care of me. I love his family. They accepted me since I first met them. I wouldn't be happy anywhere without him.