87% of American women (18-64) claim to have been harassed on the street by men

[We Keep Receipts 9,238]

I feel bad about giving Marvin a hard time about racial victim-hood issues now. I now see there's a whole other group of folks who are truly oppressed.

As well you should, you meanie! Reported.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

I recall an incident when my boyfriend and I were out for the day, and he decided to pop inside a shop to pick up some drinks for us. I gave him a smile before he left, and right after he walked inside, some guy who was in a car outside asked me if that was my husband. I said, no, my boyfriend. (I have no idea why I answered -- probably because as women we are conditioned to be nice, which is a whole other conversation.) He revved the engine and said, "Why is a hot piece like you with some Asian dude? You need a real man." And he drove away. I was so gobsmacked I didn't know what to do or say. When my boyfriend walked out, he saw I was visibly upset and I told him what happened. If the guy had been still around, I think my boyfriend would have beat the everloving daylights out of him.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

I recall an incident when my boyfriend and I were out for the day, and he decided to pop inside a shop to pick up some drinks for us. I gave him a smile before he left, and right after he walked inside, some guy who was in a car outside asked me if that was my husband. I said, no, my boyfriend. (I have no idea why I answered -- probably because as women we are conditioned to be nice, which is a whole other conversation.) He revved the engine and said, "Why is a hot piece like you with some Asian dude? You need a real man." And he drove away. I was so gobsmacked I didn't know what to do or say. When my boyfriend walked out, he saw I was visibly upset and I told him what happened. If the guy had been still around, I think my boyfriend would have beat the everloving daylights out of him.

In a man's world, that would not even cause a ripple.

Edited April 4, 2014 by The Postmaster

[Merrytooth 5,748]

Photoshooped?

You must have never watched the films Thor or the Avengers..

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

In a man's world, that would not even cause a ripple.

Well, my boyfriend was more angry that I was upset than that someone made a slur on his manhood. I was impressed that the guy managed a twofer -- racial stereotyping and a nice sexist comment too.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

You must have never watched the films Thor or the Avengers..

The neck looks a little long, and the head looks a little small. Brad looked hot, I will admit, when he played Achilles.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

Well, my boyfriend was more angry that I was upset than that someone made a slur on his manhood. I was impressed that the guy managed a twofer -- racial stereotyping and a nice sexist comment too.

I can understand. Men question each other's manhood with great regularity. But nothing pisses a man more than having to console an upset woman. That just cuts too much into quality time.

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

You must have never watched the films Thor or the Avengers..

Loki is better

[Peikko 1,575]

Truth,

I'm a gentleman. Been one since birth. It's not a favor, it's a compliment. You don't owe me a response if I say, that's a lovely hat you're wearing. My wife gets compliments when she dresses up, but that's more because she wears things from Malaysia and when a man or a woman says, that's a nice dress, there's no harm done. If I compliment someone, it's because I genuinely mean it. As far as respect goes, that's a given no matter what.

I think if we had this conversation IRL, it'd be easier to convey our thoughts.

You can compliment your wife, you mother, your friends etc but strangers on a street is a complete no no. You have absolutely NO idea what your 'compliment' means to a woman you do not know. At best, it's probably embarrassment, at worst it could be fear. If someone responded to your so called 'compliment' with piss off, what would you say? That they have some nerve to reject your compliment? Seriously, how about you're a 30 year old 'compimenting' a 16 year old? Is she meant to know you're a good guy who only wants to pass on some pleasantry? You wan to say something nice irrespective of what the recipient may or may not want because you have decided that it's something that women should expect and delight in. How did you come to this conclusion?

[Peikko 1,575]

Do you have many cats?

Yeah, because that's a really manly response to my request to respect strange women you pass in the streets. You know damn all about me but carry on using pejorative language because you think it's silly to object to being objectified. Brilliant, only a MAN could come up with that logic.

[The Nature Boy 4,224]

I think complimenting a woman on her appearance is normal as long as it's within the realm of respect. I've done it a few times and always gets smiles and a thank you. Even when I was interested and single, I've always kept it classy and had no issues. Like Teddy and BJ said, it shouldn't be a bad thing when someone takes the time to say something nice about you.

I have complemented your wife very tastefully and respectfully many times, and I am sure both of you appreciated it..Cause I am a gentleman

Truth,

I'm a gentleman. Been one since birth. It's not a favor, it's a compliment. You don't owe me a response if I say, that's a lovely hat you're wearing. My wife gets compliments when she dresses up, but that's more because she wears things from Malaysia and when a man or a woman says, that's a nice dress, there's no harm done. If I compliment someone, it's because I genuinely mean it. As far as respect goes, that's a given no matter what.

I think if we had this conversation IRL, it'd be easier to convey our thoughts.

I recall you telling me a story about some hawt gal, drinking too much and you did not. Two stories actually.

Still not sure

There is an industry magazine called Nails. "Dedicated to the success of nail professionals"

I'd say there are more than a couple of women out there that care about how they look in public...yet compliments are harassment.

You know women, they never do what they think they do in those sappy movies.

When the mathalete in high school flirted it was harassment. When the Football stud did it, it was appreciated.

She has been taking those noassatall pills

[The Nature Boy 4,224]

Out of curiosity, is it any "compliment" from a stranger or just certain types? I mean, if someone says, "nice cleavage", I can understand that. But like Marvin said, if you're wearing a really great looking hat, and he says, "nice hat" in passing, does that really bother you?

Here is the truth. If you know women, then you know how to flirt and you know instantly when a very subtle flirt is appreciated and you can up the level a bit.

I am not talking about cat calls and degrading comments.

I am talking about smiling while talking, the eye brow arch. If she smiles back , titls her head, plays with her hair drive on.

[Peikko 1,575]

Depends on the woman don't you think? I'm quite sure actually that some women dress up specifically to attract attention from strangers.

Yes you don't bother to question why there are women like that and what values they have learned and whether those values may in fact lead to these kinds of women undervaluing themselves as people because no one respects them for who they actually are, but only for what they are 'worth' to a man? This whole conversation revolves around men thinking they have the undeniable right to say whatever they like to a woman regardless of whether the woman would welcome that attention or not. If a woman is attractive to the man, he has the right to make that attraction known and the woman is supposed to just accept it as a compliment. That is just irrational.

[We Keep Receipts 9,238]

I have complemented your wife very tastefully and respectfully many times, and I am sure both of you appreciated it..Cause I am a gentleman

Even so, I still hate you.

I recall you telling me a story about some hawt gal, drinking too much and you did not. Two stories actually.

Still not sure

Yep, wouldn't take advantage of her. Watched her while she slept cause my army friends had no reservations if she was drunk or not.

You know women, they never do what they think they do in those sappy movies.

When the mathalete in high school flirted it was harassment. When the Football stud did it, it was appreciated.

She has been taking those noassatall pills

[The Nature Boy 4,224]

I think most men would see that after looking at your face that they better tread carefully around you or else.

I told my boss one time she had put on a little meat on her butt, and it looked good.. We had worked together for years, I could tell she appreciated it.