87% of American women (18-64) claim to have been harassed on the street by men

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

In an effort to put this particular track to bed, I can see where compliments would be rude and where they would work. It comes down to context and that can't be expressed through words in the internet. Who knows what Teddy means by "classy."

For my part, I cannot think of very many instances when I would want any stranger commenting on my appearance on the street, positive or negative, but I suppose in the right context it could be okay. I am imagining a suburban street meeting a new neighbor who compliments your shoes or something. But we all know it's usually not shoes...

When you know the person, or even have just been introduced, this becomes different and compliments are more appropriate, to me. At a dinner party where people dress up? A "you look lovely tonight" can be a nice compliment when introduced. It's more "I see you put effort into your appearance for this party" instead of a "nice titties."

[mota bhai 2,675]

Goodness, just like a woman, so many words and so little content!

[KayDeeCee 4,896]

I have NEVER had it happen when a man was around, at least in America.

I have. Once I was out with a male friend and the transmission went out in my car. While we were walking down the street to get help from my brother who was working not too far away, a car went by us, slowed down, then some guy inside shouted, "F*u*k her! I did!" So lovely....

It is usually when I am not with any males though. When I was 12 some guy in a truck pulled up next to me while I was waiting to cross the street and proceeded to talk about my breasts in ways that no stranger should ever say to a female, much less a 12 year old one. I was mortified and terrified. When I was a teenager one guy told me he was going to take me down to the beach and rape me and began giving details of what he would do to me. I quickly made my way to nearby group of friends who ran the guy off.

I hate walking alone anywhere, including simply shopping in the grocery store. I have been harassed by a guy working in the back when I opened the fridge door to pick out a milk. I am now in my 40's and still had some college, spring breaker punk raise his eyebrow at me and say," Hey, baby!" as I was getting in my car a couple weeks ago.

87% is definitely not too high. I think it is low.

[LibCampFireClub 635]

ETA: ExExpat: No more dancing bear clips for you!

Awww, dammit. Out with the metro-sexual in with the marlboro man.

[Operator 1,927]

Goodness, just like a woman, so many words and so little content!

Are you working on the inverse compliment equals harassment theory?

[Danno 1,228]

Sorry, no, I don't agree with this. I lived in a Muslim country for several years, and saw and experienced sexual harassment far worse than anything I've ever seen here at home in the USA. I've seen women in full on burqas and niqabs be verbally and physically harassed. Dress has nothing to do with it. It is about dominance, power and insecurity. The equivalent of a man holding his d%*k in his hand saying - 'see how big this is?'

Here's a BBC article about sexual harassment in Egypt, and an exherted comment:

But dressing conservatively is no longer a protection, according to Dina Farid of the campaign group Egypt's Girls are a Red Line.

She says even women who wear the full-face veil - the niqab - are being targeted.

"It does not make a difference at all. Most of Egyptian ladies are veiled [with a headscarf] and most of them have experienced sexual harassment.

"Statistics say that most of the women or girls who have been sexually harassed have been veiled or completely covered up with the niqab."

You can't jump from this culture to another.... to discredit my contention.

I would wager if you took the scenario I laid out and applied it to the Muslim country you mentioned, you would again find a increasing level of activity based on attire .

Keep in mind I never said even modest clothing would prevent harassment in all cultures, I only intended discredit the notion that clothing has nothing to do with it... as silly.

[I AM NOT THAT GUY 5,715]

A lot of women take a lot of pride in their appearance. I don't think they would consider that "superficial".

N.S. My wife preens non-stop all day. She will spent half an hour adjusting the sunglasses on top of her head. The make-up has to be perfect. The sweater or scarf tied just so. I know it's not for me, because she is only like when she is going out, with or without me. Then she will complain about every man that gives her a second look, or might try to start a conversation with her.

[LibCampFireClub 635]

What we in the US consider to be sexual harrassment is far from what is accepted in other countries.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=DqDCVyc4i6w

[Danno 1,228]

You really have no clue. I am glad several people have attempted to put you right, but we all know that you only believe your own rhetoric so I doubt you will change and respect women for who they are any time soon.

At some point in time you have to be honest.....

repeating stupid stuff is counter productive to change.

In a sense you are right, I don't see how pretending a woman's appearance has nothing to do with it... helps anyone?

We do know this logic has endangered many young ladies who have taken serious this same concept but in other areas.

What we in the US consider to be sexual harrassment is far from what is accepted in other countries.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=DqDCVyc4i6w

Cae in point!

[chaine1 116]

I would wager if you took the scenario I laid out and applied it to the Muslim country you mentioned, you would again find a increasing level of activity based on attire .

Not really, no. In the Muslim countries I've traveled to (~10, in addition to the one I called home), the women wear a variety of clothes..the more conservative will be in the niqab, but they also run the gamut of western clothing with women wearing shorts, capris, low cut tops and etc. There maybe less skin shown on average than here in the USA, but to apply your logic to the culture - the women wearing western clothing would face more sexual harassment than those in the niqab. And that isn't the case.

Here in the USA, I've been harassed wearing a loose sweater and jeans while walking by a construction site.

I stand by the argument that clothing has nothing to do with it. Provactive clothing may get attention and draw eyes - but it's a big leap from some guy checking you out to some guy making lewd, inappopriate comments. That's all on the man to make that (disgusting) leap, and his flawed, pathetic psychology.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Yeah, women really need to be complimented on their dress sense and toilet by complete strangers to get them through the day, that's really important. No matter how 'classy' you think you are being, you are just playing right into the idea that women want to be valued for their looks above anything else. That's just mad. I expect most women smile back because they don't have any way to respond nicely to such unwanted attention. A compliment from a stranger for how one looks really has no value whatsoever.

I remember seeing a sign that says, "Charity begins with a smile." It's what all humans want and need - to be acknowledged and treated with respect and dignity. It seems like some guys think they're doing public service by acknowledging a woman's beauty, but what about everybody else? Do these same guys tell a stranger that he's a handsome guy if it's done in a platonic way? Does that somehow lift one's spirit and make their day? I doubt it. Culturally, if woman have been told that their value in society is heavily dependent on their outward appearance, then it's understandable that some might be flattered by compliments on their beauty by strange men, but it is superficial. I think most of us want to be recognized for the beauty within us than be judged by the thin veneer of our outward appearance.

[B_J 2,752]

I had a friend that the ladies apparently thought was really good looking. He would never complain about compliments from total strangers. And he got a lot of compliments. I can't tell you how many times a total stranger came up to him and told him how good looking he was - women would come up to him and and say, "I don't normally do this" and give him her phone number. It never stopped. And I guess I was freaking invisible. Hello, I would like a compliment too.

He's not my friend anymore.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I had a friend that the ladies apparently thought was really good looking. He would never complain about compliments from total strangers. And he got a lot of compliments. I can't tell you how many times a total stranger came up to him and told him how good looking he was - women would come up to him and and say, "I don't normally do this" and give him her phone number. It never stopped. And I guess I was freaking invisible. Hello, I would like a compliment too.

He's not my friend anymore.

As someone whose is extremely good looking, I can tell you it makes you feel uncomfortable to get that repeated attention from strangers. We want others to be attracted to who we are in the inside. Nobody wants to be treated like a piece of meat, trust me.

[Penny Lane 8,159]

What we in the US consider to be sexual harrassment is far from what is accepted in other countries.

Okay, and?

[LibCampFireClub 635]

Okay, and?

....and...............

it's the end of the story.

The American way is the only way, right? All others need a lesson from you.