Honor Killings

[jordanianprincess 0]

I read the Jordan Times and every now and then a story will pop up about honor killings. Most of the times when someone is killed. The person or persons who did it will go right down to the police station and confess.

The victim is usually buried in an unmarked grave with no coffin. There is no service, no period of morning. It is absoulutly disgraceful and sick. As much as I love my country, I hate the fact they condone such behavior.

They have put systems in place to help women who feel they are in danger of being killed but it is just as ridiculous as the crime itself. They allow the girl to check into prison to remain "safe" from her family, but she can't ever check herself out. There are however other organizations that truly do help women in need but they are rare.

[Jenn! 918]

See thats one of the things that concerns me. If I met a man from another country and I was planning on going there then I would do as much research about the country as possible. The info is not hidden, its out there. There are alot of watch dog groups that monitor this stuff. I am happy that I have brought awareness of the subject to our group but concerned over some of the answers I have seen so far including the votes.

I think it was a really important topic to bring up. I hope that people who are in the beginning stages of their relationship and don't know their SO all that well will consider discussing it.

[AngelK96 0]

I read the Jordan Times and every now and then a story will pop up about honor killings. Most of the times when someone is killed. The person or persons who did it will go right down to the police station and confess.

The victim is usually buried in an unmarked grave with no coffin. There is no service, no period of morning. It is absoulutly disgraceful and sick. As much as I love my country, I hate the fact they condone such behavior.

They have put systems in place to help women who feel they are in danger of being killed but it is just as ridiculous as the crime itself. They allow the girl to check into prison to remain "safe" from her family, but she can't ever check herself out. There are however other organizations that truly do help women in need but they are rare.

I like jordan too, but i don't like the judicial system where they only get put in prison for so many years if even that. Also the revenge killing between families there. Some of the men from a family would be put in jail for there protection until a truce can be made.

[peezey 0]

when I think about embracing and accepting an SOs culture, this ain't one of the things I include. I am still out of my mind with the answers to the poll.

[Jenn! 918]

when I think about embracing and accepting an SOs culture, this ain't one of the things I include. I am still out of my mind with the answers to the poll.

Me too.

An I know I brought it up before, but I'm still a bit puzzled. Yes, this may happen in the U.S., but why would a man want to come to the U.S. and possibly raise a family here knowing that the chances are so much higher of having a daughter who has premarital relations?

[jordanianprincess 0]

when I think about embracing and accepting an SOs culture, this ain't one of the things I include. I am still out of my mind with the answers to the poll.

I don't embrace or accept this in my culture.

I read the Jordan Times and every now and then a story will pop up about honor killings. Most of the times when someone is killed. The person or persons who did it will go right down to the police station and confess.

The victim is usually buried in an unmarked grave with no coffin. There is no service, no period of morning. It is absoulutly disgraceful and sick. As much as I love my country, I hate the fact they condone such behavior.

They have put systems in place to help women who feel they are in danger of being killed but it is just as ridiculous as the crime itself. They allow the girl to check into prison to remain "safe" from her family, but she can't ever check herself out. There are however other organizations that truly do help women in need but they are rare.

I like jordan too, but i don't like the judicial system where they only get put in prison for so many years if even that. Also the revenge killing between families there. Some of the men from a family would be put in jail for there protection until a truce can be made.

Year?!??! Its actually months if even that!

[jordanianprincess 0]

when I think about embracing and accepting an SOs culture, this ain't one of the things I include. I am still out of my mind with the answers to the poll.

Me too.

An I know I brought it up before, but I'm still a bit puzzled. Yes, this may happen in the U.S., but why would a man want to come to the U.S. and possibly raise a family here knowing that the chances are so much higher of having a daughter who has premarital relations?

They think they have the ultimate solution. Move here, make alot of money (because it grows on trees), and when the daughter gets to the age where she could start having relations they say they will move back home. Now in reality many people that say this change as they get used to life here. Not all of them do, but for the most part they leave alot of their customs behind especially if there is no one to hold them to it.

Growing up, my father had a temper. He never hit us or anything but he would yell alot. I'm almost 100% certain that given the time he grew and the area he is from in Jordan that honor killings were tolerated and enforced at that time.

When he came to America, he left all that ####### behind. Like I said many people will say it, just to "fit in" but most won't do it. My dad is westernized now, but not completly. He has held on the values and customs he felt are important and that best respresent out country and he has gotten rid of all the trash.

[AngelK96 0]

when I think about embracing and accepting an SOs culture, this ain't one of the things I include. I am still out of my mind with the answers to the poll.

I don't embrace or accept this in my culture.

I read the Jordan Times and every now and then a story will pop up about honor killings. Most of the times when someone is killed. The person or persons who did it will go right down to the police station and confess.

The victim is usually buried in an unmarked grave with no coffin. There is no service, no period of morning. It is absoulutly disgraceful and sick. As much as I love my country, I hate the fact they condone such behavior.

They have put systems in place to help women who feel they are in danger of being killed but it is just as ridiculous as the crime itself. They allow the girl to check into prison to remain "safe" from her family, but she can't ever check herself out. There are however other organizations that truly do help women in need but they are rare.

I like jordan too, but i don't like the judicial system where they only get put in prison for so many years if even that. Also the revenge killing between families there. Some of the men from a family would be put in jail for there protection until a truce can be made.

Year?!??! Its actually months if even that!

ok ok..months!!!!!

and I don't accept or embrace this as a part of my husband's culture also.

[dollface41601 0]

Jacque.....I can tell u one thing ive learned since being married to sofyan....whenever i make an example of something....i should NEVER use one person in his family as the example...he has made that clear...maybe thats why Moh freaked...

on the subject...sofyan and i have talked about it before, not to an extent, but i do know he would never take the life of his own daughter or sister, but i do know he would disown her.....sofyan and i discuss what will happen once we have children and they are old enough where society may get the best of them here, and we both agree its all about the parenting....and i see it everyday....the kids whose parents talk but dont enforce, and those who talk and enforce...i can speak for the 5 muslim girls i work with, ages 18-25, all unmarried, and virgins, and they all say they will wait for marriage, they all grew up in american culture, but, never lost touch with their muslim-arab culture, and i pray, sofyan and i can be the best parents and guide our future children down the right path

[Jenn! 918]

I can tell u one thing ive learned since being married to sofyan....whenever i make an example of something....i should NEVER use one person in his family as the example...he has made that clear...

Why do you think that is? I would think that making it personal would allow for a more honest and specific discussion, rather than just speaking generally.

[Ban Hammer 13,113]

and all this time i was thinking you had some capoeira trick to tell me about

But you can scare them away with some strong macumba...

nessa just translated that for me.

[dollface41601 0]

jenn,

i think, or maybe im assuming, arabian people dont use families as examples because they have like an old tale that it will happen to the person.

[sarah and hicham 3]

I can tell u one thing ive learned since being married to sofyan....whenever i make an example of something....i should NEVER use one person in his family as the example...he has made that clear...

Why do you think that is? I would think that making it personal would allow for a more honest and specific discussion, rather than just speaking generally.

I was wondering the same thing!

[Jenn! 918]

jenn,

i think, or maybe im assuming, arabian people dont use families as examples because they have like an old tale that it will happen to the person.

Oh I see. That makes sense.

I was always nervous when my friends would use death in their family as an excuse to not take an exam or something.

[dollface41601 0]

I mean honestly, like if i was speaking to someone and said, "lets say your dad dies from cancer tomorrow..."

wouldnt it kinda make u worried>?