Honor Killings

[peezey 0]

Concerning human nature, the "other guy" is always in some way wrong because his motivations are not based on the same reality as the one doing the observing of "the other guy". As many on this site should well know, the differences in cultures is sometimes subtle and sometimes not. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. This thread is just another frollick through the land of that creepy "other guy".

Yeah, but I'd say it's more than creepy though! This is about murder! I can't just chalk that up to different strokes for different folks...

that's what I was going to say. As deeshla said, cultural relativism is out the window when you're talking about murder, also, any sort of female genital mutilation, or pretty much anything that condones violence as a means to an end.

[mybackpages 0]

Concerning human nature, the "other guy" is always in some way wrong because his motivations are not based on the same reality as the one doing the observing of "the other guy". As many on this site should well know, the differences in cultures is sometimes subtle and sometimes not. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. This thread is just another frollick through the land of that creepy "other guy".

Yeah, but I'd say it's more than creepy though! This is about murder! I can't just chalk that up to different strokes for different folks...

Right! this is not about cultural relativism. There are certainly things that we can not agree with nor understand because of the cultural misunderstanding of the action. BUT this is about the justification of murder. You will find many people of the culture being questioned agreeing this is not an appropriate action. It's not just those on the outside of the culture calling it out.

[Jenn! 918]

Concerning human nature, the "other guy" is always in some way wrong because his motivations are not based on the same reality as the one doing the observing of "the other guy". As many on this site should well know, the differences in cultures is sometimes subtle and sometimes not. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. This thread is just another frollick through the land of that creepy "other guy".

Yeah, but I'd say it's more than creepy though! This is about murder! I can't just chalk that up to different strokes for different folks...

Right! this is not about cultural relativism. There are certainly things that we can not agree with nor understand because of the cultural misunderstanding of the action. BUT this is about the justification of murder. You will find many people of the culture being questioned agreeing this is not an appropriate action. It's not just those on the outside of the culture calling it out.

Yes, and according to this poll we have 9 VJ members whose SO would kill their daughter. While there's no justification, at least there is a reason behind it - cultural upbringing. What is the excuse for the USC who has not been raised in that environment?

[Bosco 1]

Concerning human nature, the "other guy" is always in some way wrong because his motivations are not based on the same reality as the one doing the observing of "the other guy". As many on this site should well know, the differences in cultures is sometimes subtle and sometimes not. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. This thread is just another frollick through the land of that creepy "other guy".

Yeah, but I'd say it's more than creepy though! This is about murder! I can't just chalk that up to different strokes for different folks...

Right! this is not about cultural relativism. There are certainly things that we can not agree with nor understand because of the cultural misunderstanding of the action. BUT this is about the justification of murder. You will find many people of the culture being questioned agreeing this is not an appropriate action. It's not just those on the outside of the culture calling it out.

Yes, and according to this poll we have 9 VJ members whose SO would kill their daughter. While there's no justification, at least there is a reason behind it - cultural upbringing. What is the excuse for the USC who has not been raised in that environment?

love

[Jenn! 918]

Concerning human nature, the "other guy" is always in some way wrong because his motivations are not based on the same reality as the one doing the observing of "the other guy". As many on this site should well know, the differences in cultures is sometimes subtle and sometimes not. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing. This thread is just another frollick through the land of that creepy "other guy".

Yeah, but I'd say it's more than creepy though! This is about murder! I can't just chalk that up to different strokes for different folks...

Right! this is not about cultural relativism. There are certainly things that we can not agree with nor understand because of the cultural misunderstanding of the action. BUT this is about the justification of murder. You will find many people of the culture being questioned agreeing this is not an appropriate action. It's not just those on the outside of the culture calling it out.

Yes, and according to this poll we have 9 VJ members whose SO would kill their daughter. While there's no justification, at least there is a reason behind it - cultural upbringing. What is the excuse for the USC who has not been raised in that environment?

love

But where is the love for one's future children?

[Bosco 1]

But where is the love for one's future children?

You do realize that was tongue in cheek. Your question brought to mind when a woman is confronted with her man cheating or something else plainly wrong and you hear the pleading voice "but I love him".

[Jenn! 918]

But where is the love for one's future children?

You do realize that was tongue in cheek. Your question brought to mind when a woman is confronted with her man cheating or something else plainly wrong and you hear the pleading voice "but I love him".

But with cheating you're not choosing your husband over the life of your child.

ETA: maybe it's a "I'll cross that bridge when i come to it sort of thing." I just don't know.

Edited January 5, 2007 by jenn3539

[Bosco 1]

But where is the love for one's future children?

You do realize that was tongue in cheek. Your question brought to mind when a woman is confronted with her man cheating or something else plainly wrong and you hear the pleading voice "but I love him".

But with cheating you're not choosing your husband over the life of your child.

ETA: maybe it's a "I'll cross that bridge when i come to it sort of thing." I just don't know.

Not comparing cheating to murder, just that it evokes that "but I love him" whiney voice I have heard too many times.

[Jenn! 918]

But where is the love for one's future children?

You do realize that was tongue in cheek. Your question brought to mind when a woman is confronted with her man cheating or something else plainly wrong and you hear the pleading voice "but I love him".

But with cheating you're not choosing your husband over the life of your child.

ETA: maybe it's a "I'll cross that bridge when i come to it sort of thing." I just don't know.

Not comparing cheating to murder, just that it evokes that "but I love him" whiney voice I have heard too many times.

Do you have any guesses about the now 10 votes that say their SO would kill their own child?

[ya falaha! 0]

So what you're saying is that because one's husband doesn't go out and protest against honor killings or has a nonchalant attitude towards it we should divorce them? IMO it doesn't equal not loving your children or future children. These men were raised in enviroments that support this behavior. Just because our husbands may not disagree doesn't mean we agree. Also doesn't mean that I (for one) who accept philandering or abuse or what have you for love. I'm not one of those kinda gals. Honestly, I don't feel particularly passionate about this topic. It's just another crazy issue of the world. I just take a bit of offensive that because my husband doesn't disagree with honor killings that means I'm like this idiot woman who is blindly in love.

[Bosco 1]

So what you're saying is that because one's husband doesn't go out and protest against honor killings or has a nonchalant attitude towards it we should divorce them? IMO it doesn't equal not loving your children or future children. These men were raised in enviroments that support this behavior. Just because our husbands may not disagree doesn't mean we agree. Also doesn't mean that I (for one) who accept philandering or abuse or what have you for love. I'm not one of those kinda gals. Honestly, I don't feel particularly passionate about this topic. It's just another crazy issue of the world. I just take a bit of offensive that because my husband doesn't disagree with honor killings that means I'm like this idiot woman who is blindly in love.

Would you have children with him knowing he supports this?

[peezey 0]

So what you're saying is that because one's husband doesn't go out and protest against honor killings or has a nonchalant attitude towards it we should divorce them? IMO it doesn't equal not loving your children or future children. These men were raised in enviroments that support this behavior. Just because our husbands may not disagree doesn't mean we agree. Also doesn't mean that I (for one) who accept philandering or abuse or what have you for love. I'm not one of those kinda gals. Honestly, I don't feel particularly passionate about this topic. It's just another crazy issue of the world. I just take a bit of offensive that because my husband doesn't disagree with honor killings that means I'm like this idiot woman who is blindly in love.

I don't know you, but in response to this, my opinion, if this were my situation, that no excuse, including how the man is raised, makes up for accepting the existence of murder of women for illegitimate reasons, and I think there are other women here that feel as strongly as I do and so are having a really hard time understanding where other women who do accept this about their husbands, are coming from.

[Jenn! 918]

So what you're saying is that because one's husband doesn't go out and protest against honor killings or has a nonchalant attitude towards it we should divorce them? IMO it doesn't equal not loving your children or future children. These men were raised in enviroments that support this behavior. Just because our husbands may not disagree doesn't mean we agree. Also doesn't mean that I (for one) who accept philandering or abuse or what have you for love. I'm not one of those kinda gals. Honestly, I don't feel particularly passionate about this topic. It's just another crazy issue of the world. I just take a bit of offensive that because my husband doesn't disagree with honor killings that means I'm like this idiot woman who is blindly in love.

I was referring specifically to those 10 people who voted that their SO owuld kill their own daughter. I think you stated that he would disown her although he doesn't disagree in general with the practice.

The way I see it, someone agreeing to disagree with her husband who says that he *will* kill his daughter if necessary is by default agreeing with the murder of her own child.

[Joey559 1]

But where is the love for one's future children?

You do realize that was tongue in cheek. Your question brought to mind when a woman is confronted with her man cheating or something else plainly wrong and you hear the pleading voice "but I love him".

But with cheating you're not choosing your husband over the life of your child.

ETA: maybe it's a "I'll cross that bridge when i come to it sort of thing." I just don't know.

I don't know either. I mean, at that point where an SO said he would kill a sister/daughter for shaming the family I think i'd start to think then what the HELL does he think of me? You are another woman, if he places so little value on a woman sister/daughter that his so called honor is more important and he's willing to commit murder how can he have any respect/love for you?

[ya falaha! 0]

Ah well I'm just not bent over it is all. I have bigger issues to deal with. Again...just because my husband isn't out protesting against this doesn't mean he'll do it. He's never said he'd do it. I don't believe he would do it. It's a non issue IMO. I'm sorry I commented in the first place and sorry I've continued trying to explain myself. In the future I'll choose topics to respond to more wisely as I've noticed many others have done. It's no wonder not many ppl get involved in these topics. Funny...I didn't vote that my husband would kill a family member over this but 9 others did and not one has spoke up. Wonder why.

Actually I voted that he'd send her back to his country not disown her.

So what you're saying is that because one's husband doesn't go out and protest against honor killings or has a nonchalant attitude towards it we should divorce them? IMO it doesn't equal not loving your children or future children. These men were raised in enviroments that support this behavior. Just because our husbands may not disagree doesn't mean we agree. Also doesn't mean that I (for one) who accept philandering or abuse or what have you for love. I'm not one of those kinda gals. Honestly, I don't feel particularly passionate about this topic. It's just another crazy issue of the world. I just take a bit of offensive that because my husband doesn't disagree with honor killings that means I'm like this idiot woman who is blindly in love.

I don't know you, but in response to this, my opinion, if this were my situation, that no excuse, including how the man is raised, makes up for accepting the existence of murder of women for illegitimate reasons, and I think there are other women here that feel as strongly as I do and so are having a really hard time understanding where other women who do accept this about their husbands, are coming from.

Edited January 5, 2007 by moody