USCIS has turned my marriage into a joke...

[Francan 0]

I must say that is has been wonderful to really share very similar thoughts and emotions with many of you in this thread. My husband and I met in June 2011. I was 22, and when we started dating the month after, I really wanted to make sure we really got to know each other. We dated for a whole year before he proposed. We decided to get married in France after we were advised not to do so in the US since it might look "bad in the future?" even though for financial reasons it was better for my husband to continue to work in France. We chose not to get married in Mexico, because it's just so expensive to translate and it wasn't very safe in my opinion for his family to travel to my home city. We got married in Dec. 2012, and filed at the end of March 2013. We thought it would go by quick, just like many people have stated. I knew this journey would not be easy. We both knew it but no one could've prepared us for how long this would really take. We didn't get to spend much time together so I went to visit my husband for spring break and after the summer was over, I was feeling very sad. I really missed him, so I went to visit for a week in November for Thanksgiving week. (I'm a teacher, so I have some time here and there). That week was not enough, so I had to tell my family in Mexico, I wouldn't be able to spend the holidays with them, once again. I haven't been able to see my family for over a year now because any chance I get, I try to spend it in France with my husband. This is a very difficult decision to make all the time but in order to make our long distance marriage work, we have to spend as much time together as we can. So this winter break, I spent two weeks with my husband. We were so happy to spend them together because we at least got to spend our anniversary together.

It hasn't been easy but I know that when we are done with this, there is nothing that will break us. I believe that our long distance relationships, even though people can't believe how we do it, really test us in ways that no other relationships do. They teach us to really communicate, use our time wisely and how to love and be patient. Like many of you have expressed, we really dislike not knowing what's next in our plans. Wanting to move, look for jobs, have kids, etc. We often look at other people's cases who got married after we did and already are together and we actually just received our RFE after not hearing at all for 9 months! Now we just wait until we have our new case number since today we found out our I-130 has been approved but at this point we're just hopeful. It's comforting to see you're all going through the same struggles, although I wish for all of us to be together with our loved ones soon. Thank you for sharing your stories and just know that even if these cases take forever, there has to be something positive coming from this wait. (I at least like to think so) In April it will be a year since our NO1, so all we want at this point is for my husband to be here by June. We want to have a honeymoon and we can't even plan that until we know he'll be here for sure!

[Hotter Otter 1,211]

Maybe my moaning about NVC paid off as we finally got our case number yesterday!

[gabeRao 43]

I was referring to the very title of this thread...

I don't dispute for a second that the process is frustrating, nor do I take the separation and the anxiety lightly. I must however point out to the mob mentality that has taken over many because of what the USCIS may or may not be doing in regards to DACA. Everything you hear or read are just allegations because there is no visibility as to how the system works. My point is that the entire process is already bad enough that one should not need to seek additional reasons to further one's exasperation. I was dispensing some tough love.

How man do you not have any visibility as to how the system works.

They dont have the resources and cant hire new ones to process DACA

They screwed over K1s for 6 or so months

Then they screwed over american citizens

Ever heard of a queue - like a first in first out illegals always out queue ?

Like it is in every other country in the world.

Uno suggestion - give that tough love to those who ask for amnesty as if its their birthright

Those who dont learn english, fly flags of their own countries while asking for american identity

Let those welfare loving thugs be the recipients of your hard hitting comments.

Edited February 25, 2014 by gabeRao

[En-oh-eh-to now 147]

Uno suggestion - give that tough love to those who ask for amnesty as if its their birthright

Those who dont learn english, fly flags of their own countries while asking for american identity

Let those welfare loving thugs be the recipients of your hard hitting comments.

That's an awful lot of generalizations for just one post. You might want to split it up into different posts; you know, to balance things out a bit.

[gabeRao 43]

That's an awful lot of generalizations for just one post. You might want to split it up into different posts; you know, to balance things out a bit.

I could direct you to visuals from their "immigration rights" rallies for factual confirmation.

Anybody who takes something that was not given to them by their parents or their family or did not earn it -- is a thug

Nobody has to be PC for your comfort

[altito 63]

ProTip: There are far less people seeking to immigrate to those countries.

i dont agree, Avery. It is true that there are less inmigration to Spain and India than to the US, but accordingly to its population, in Spain immigrants still are around 12% over total (6 million people out of 46 million).

Maybe the US have 40 million of inmigrants, (12% over 330 million people) too, but I think it is a question of resources and willingness....

[suhailsaish 24]

Finally!!!! Got my text and emails yesterday of approval... I arranged a surprise with her family to all show up at once at her house while we were on Skype... After she damaged my ear drums by screaming, she started to cry with joy. Very happy for this step to be done... Can't wait for her to be here. Thank you all for your support and wish you all the best of luck. We'll be praying for you guys!

[BOS_LHR 829]

Finally!!!! Got my text and emails yesterday of approval... I arranged a surprise with her family to all show up at once at her house while we were on Skype... After she damaged my ear drums by screaming, she started to cry with joy. Very happy for this step to be done... Can't wait for her to be here. Thank you all for your support and wish you all the best of luck. We'll be praying for you guys!

What a great way to break the news! Congratulations!!

[suhailsaish 24]

What a great way to break the news! Congratulations!!

Thank you... Good luck to you on your journey!

[masooma shahid 2]

i totally understand the feelings because i am going through the same situation no1 else living a normal life with their partner can understand this pain .....i have been married more than a year now also expecting a baby and i m no way near my visa i expect my husband to feel the same but probably men are less expressive or he have alot of other things to do so he is less frustrated than me plus i have to face the society who constantly ask me y i m living with parents after marriage ... but feels like i have no way out never thought abt this kind of marriage before gettin married to US citizen they think we dont deserve a normal life like others:(

MAy GOD help us all

[malenliam 18]

As simple as this..how come they were asking for more proof of a true marriage, well in fact going through with all this waiting, so deppressing, is a sign of true love and genuine marriage. 9 months had passed since we started this visa journey, our case is still in USCIS. I started loosing hope.

[AKukreti 24]

aaaahhh!! I knew it! It was only a matter of time before *that* one person has to come and rain on everyone's parade! You HAD to come on here just to ruin the mood.

Of course, what do you care? You're already getting your naturalization so you don't have to go through what the rest of us are going through. And if you did, you've long forgotten.

"What does the complain come from?" Well, we're all just telling our stories, that's all. This is a safe place for us to come and bond with each other... don't like it and don't want to read others' stories? Then go elsewhere and keep your negativity to yourself.

(Let me guess, since you're from "NJ" I will guess that you're a Brazilian living in the Newark area surrounded by the thousands of others who come here illegally from Valadares, if you're not one yourself and so you feel the need to jump on the "illegal" comment... I know all about you people. I worked in Newark for 7 years helping the Portuguese and Brazilian immigrants who spoke no English. I have heard every immigration, welfare, frivolous lawsuit, construction, you-name-it-it-happened scam in the book that you could think of. And YES, we K1 and CR-1/IR-1 are paying partly because of the immigration bit. But you brought that up, not us.)

Wish there was a like icon for the comment. Jersey Girl, met my fiance in Newark. Lived in Hudson County all my life, I know how it is...