'Forced' to marry

[Fandango 1,439]

It seems that the problem is not with people's commitment or lack thereof. Instead, the problem is with people's religiousness. I think that's really what's at issue here. Otherwise, I can't comprehend what's going on here anymore.

I think it's people's self-righteousness and indignation that is the problem.

[mybackpages 0]

It seems that the problem is not with people's commitment or lack thereof. Instead, the problem is with people's religiousness. I think that's really what's at issue here. Otherwise, I can't comprehend what's going on here anymore.

Much of the argument here is because there is a group of people who feel that marriage is being threatened. Some of a view of what marriage is and have come to defend it against all of us who dare challenge it. Marriage has always been an evolving institution, nothing new here.

I am using marriage as a means to an end because the law is set up this way. This bothers a lot of people.

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

Just when I make a NY resolution to "waste less time on the internet" along comes a trainwreck of a thread.

I've been with my husband for almost 16 years, we only got married last April. We aren't religious and didn't feel the need to get married until we needed it for moving to the US. Our relationship has outlasted most of our friends marriages, and even our parents.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Problem is in seperation of the two areas you CAN have each without the other where some see as being one in the same (my opinion anyway)

[Fandango 1,439]

Just when I make a NY resolution to "waste less time on the internet" along comes a trainwreck of a thread.

I've been with my husband for almost 16 years, we only got married last April. We aren't religious and didn't feel the need to get married until we needed it for moving to the US. Our relationship has outlasted most of our friends marriages, and even our parents.

that's awesome!

As far as your NY res, I made that one too...so thanks for reminding me!

See ya later peeps!

[Jenn! 918]

It seems that the problem is not with people's commitment or lack thereof. Instead, the problem is with people's religiousness. I think that's really what's at issue here. Otherwise, I can't comprehend what's going on here anymore.

Much of the argument here is because there is a group of people who feel that marriage is being threatened. Some of a view of what marriage is and have come to defend it against all of us who dare challenge it. Marriage has always been an evolving institution, nothing new here.

I am using marriage as a means to an end because the law is set up this way. This bothers a lot of people.

Thank you for phrasing that much better than me. I did not mean to imply that being religious is a problem.

And has been pointed out, it's really not all the committed couples on VJ that should be getting a finger pointed at them. Rather it should be the people who do enter a marriage without commitment.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

But there again who is to decied the degree of their comittment both on and off VJ I really dont think there is a final answer. THe best of commitments can turn into divorce if married.

[bostonparis 0]

I resent the implication that because someone is divorced that they take marriage less seriously. I think that is a VERY ignorant statement.

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

I resent the implication that because someone is divorced that they take marriage less seriously. I think that is a VERY ignorant statement.

why?

[garya505 2]

Gary without being personal have YOU been married and divorced before?

No, but mine is a somewhat unusual case. My former SO was married before she met me, and she never wanted to get married again. I loved her, so I went along with that. She died after we were together 20 years. How's that for commitment without marriage?

[Sinergy 3]

I resent the implication that because someone is divorced that they take marriage less seriously. I think that is a VERY ignorant statement.

uh yea!!! i was married before but i take my married very seriously, i dont think my divorse changed me or my views on marriage other than "know the person better the next time i get married" but i dont think my divorsing made me any less serious about married.

[KarenCee 3]

Strange hiccups.

umm showered and used the roll on so dont think so, and all the times I've stood with you on the Older Women issues and now your trying to scare me

That was for Karen, not you, sis.

Hmmm.....interesting....I wasn't referring to anything that *I* smell....it was *your* sense of smell I was referring to, since you have proclaimed you can "smell" someone's fear. Semantics again...they appear to be an issue with you.

[Jenn! 918]

Gary without being personal have YOU been married and divorced before?

No, but mine is a somewhat unusual case. My former SO was married before she met me, and she never wanted to get married again. I loved her, so I went along with that. She died after we were together 20 years. How's that for commitment without marriage?

I'm very sorry to hear that, Gary.

I must admit that you've left me quite confused, however, regarding your stance on this issue. Did this post not bother you then?

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&p=643771

[*julez* 124]

Gary without being personal have YOU been married and divorced before?

No, but mine is a somewhat unusual case. My former SO was married before she met me, and she never wanted to get married again. I loved her, so I went along with that. She died after we were together 20 years. How's that for commitment without marriage?

So, if committment without marriage worked for you at one point in your life why have you been railing against others who want that for themselves now? I am seriously puzzled by your antipathy.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

sorry for your loss for sure and u just gave good example of true commitment without marriage and i hope many good years ahead for you