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JelloShotGirl

So-called friends...etc....

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I've heard these comments- usually not from people who are very close to me. I tend to look at them and feel sorry for them. I mean how sad that they have to project their own fears on to my relationship.

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24 March 2009 I-751 received by USCIS

27 March 2009 Check Cashed

30 March 2009 NOA received

8 April 2009 Biometric notice arrived by mail

24 April 2009 Biometrics scheduled

26 April 2009 Touched

...once again waiting

1 September 2009 (just over 5 months) Approved and card production ordered.

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Australia
Timeline

I haven't gotten any comments about him using me for a green card I guess because he is from Australia? :huh: But I do know maybe 2 of my friends don't respect this relationship or see it as a real thing because we are not able to be together now. They have big doubts which I can understand. I didn't talk to one friend for like 3 weeks because she wanted to fix me up with a guy that she deemed to be better looking. :angry: I told her that was very disrespectful. :angry:

I just ignore people and I keep my circle of trust and info very tight.

11/27/2006 Filed I-129F

12/01/06 received at CSC NOA1

12/09/06 checked cleared

02/28/07 touched!

02/28/07 NOA2 via email 3 of them!!!!

03/01/07 touched

03/09/07 NOA2 received via snail mail

03/20/07 Received email from Sydney that packet 3 should be mailed out tomorrow

03/26/07 Fiance received packet 3

4/26/07 Fiance medical appointment

5/01/07 New date of medical appointment

5/14/07 Fiance interview date!

VISA APPROVED!

6/8/07 My fiance arrives in America

7/14/07 Wedding day!

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Filed: Country: Canada
Timeline
I haven't gotten any comments about him using me for a green card I guess because he is from Australia? :huh: But I do know maybe 2 of my friends don't respect this relationship or see it as a real thing because we are not able to be together now. They have big doubts which I can understand. I didn't talk to one friend for like 3 weeks because she wanted to fix me up with a guy that she deemed to be better looking. :angry: I told her that was very disrespectful. :angry:

I just ignore people and I keep my circle of trust and info very tight.

That's what I did, and still do. I keep things close to my chest, metaphorically speaking. I got a couple of "GC" comments too. I had to laugh at those, at the obvious ignorance of them. Not to sound like I'm generalizing or profiling, but how many Canadians do you know that use Americans just to get a GC? Most of what I've dealt with, and it's not really bad, just basic ignorance, is "why don't you two just get married?"(ignorance of the how's and whys of the immigration system) or "why didn't you just find a decent American to marry?"(rolled my eyes at that one!).

Teaching is the essential profession...the one that makes ALL other professions possible - David Haselkorn

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They aren't friends... friends are supportive..

I get this from most people...Even my kids.. they don't come out and say it but you hear enough about Mail order bride BS that you know that they are either feeling sorry for you or wishing for a crash and burn....

Alot of close minded Americans.. they think if someone wants to marry a person from the States it's all about a green card.. you can blame the media on that.. and it never enters into their small primitive brains..it could be love..

Lets see who has the last laugh... :thumbs:

My husband to be and I have been together for over 2 years, I notice that since his interview date is coming up, I seem to be getting some snide remarks from so called friends and family members, sometimes saying it jokingly that "all he wants is greencard." This is getting really annoying, anyone with experience or how to handle.
Edited by Chris-n-Veronica

9/14 2006 I-129F Sent Next day Air

9/15 Recieved and signed for by "Freeman" at NSC

9/19 NOA1 CSC Recieved

9/25 Notice date Check cashed 9/25

9/28 I Recieved NOA1(I-797C) in the mail

12/5 NOA2 12/6 but Approved on 12/5 touch

12/9 Received NOA2(I-797) by snail mail

12/15 NVC has received it..Case # issued...

12/19 NVC shipped to Romania

12/22 Romanian Embassy has received an email from NVC that my Petition is on it's way...

12/29 Packet 3 sent to Veronica

1/12 2007 Packet 3 received Dang Holidays..

1/22 Sending all paperwork(I-134,Bank/Employer letters etc..,)..to Veronica per DHL, 3.5lbs...$144 WOW!

1/25 Recieved notice that She needs to pick up my packet in Chisinau..

1/26 Sending Back Packet 3

2/16 Transit Visa to go to Romania for the Interview approved..

2/20 Leaves for Bucharest overnight drive by bus...

2/21 Medical

2/22 Interview !!!! APPROVED !!!!!

3/9 2007 Flight to me....

4/7 2007 Married,,,

AOS

7/27 Sent I-485, I-864, I-765

7/30 Chicago Recieved I-485,I-765

Veronica is pregant....Due 4/17/08

9/1 Recieved NOA Bio appointment letter

9/8 Recieved NOA1's for both I-485 and I-765

9/18 Bio appointment

Received Green Card.. Nov 2007

Djuliann came 4/25/2008

I-751 Lifting Of Conditions

9/8/2009 Sent I-751

Received NOA 9/21 NOA Receipt Date 9/10/2009

9/24 received Bio letter Dated 9/18

10/9 Bio Appointment

10/23 Received Permanent Resident Card

N-400 2012

Filed for citizenship sent 2/21/2012

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Filed: Other Country: Morocco
Timeline
I'm sorry to hear this. I experienced the same thing and still do. My so called "used to be best friend" loves to send 'anti-muslim' emails to me at least weekly. She rarely calls and if we just happen to see her out, she acts like she's still my best friend. I've learned through this whole process you learn who your true friends are and make even better friends. Maybe it takes something like this to really find out who your true friends are.

I agree with you Aymerlu. I have had people who judged my current fiance based on the actions of my ex husband. If they continued after I told them how much different Omar is than the rat I was married to, I ditch them. They are not friends because they are making a generalization without any merit. Those who have taken the time to get to know Omar via chat and email all see him as a totally different person. Your family/friends should be willing to give your SO a fair chance. Just because they are family doesn't mean you have to put up with their nonsense.

Maggie

08-07-06 I129 NOA1

02-05-07 Visa in Hand

02-13-07 POE JFK w/temp EAD

02-23-07 Civil Marriage

06-17-07 Wedding

08-13-07 Card received in mail

04-14-09 Trip to Maui for Anniversary

06-04-09 Filed to lift conditions

08-13-09 Perm Card received

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Netherlands
Timeline

Sometimes there are ignorant people making ignorant comments so I would ignore their negative remarks if possible... :rolleyes: Friends are for supporting your decision even tho your SO is from a foreign country or not.

I have been on this situation (kind of), not because of the GC, but people saying "Oh he could have a GF there, you don't know what's he's doing and men are always gonna be men"... :wacko: I just go the other way and have deaf ears to those kind of comments... I trust my fiancé completely.

Good luck on your journey and happy 2007! :dance:

Our AOS Journey

July 18, 07: AOS/EAD sent to Chicago

Aug 03, 07: Received Biometrics appt. letter

Aug 23, 07: Biometrics

Aug 30, 07: Transfer to CSC letter dated 8/27

Sept 19, 07: EAD Approval email

Sept 29, 07: EAD card Received

Oct 09, 07: AOS Approved

Oct 13, 07: Green Card in hand

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Veronica does the same as you and trust completely too.. Let me tell the otherside and I'm male...As I tell Veronica...After her there is no one else.. I've been here by myself for months...and I can't even begin to think about going and being stupid.. I perfer to stay home waiting for her... As you see I'm home tonight... and I'm Sure your SO feels the same.. Why would we do something bad..if we have found our love... ? So rest easy and let those idiots yak...and smile to yourself..knowing they probably never had true love.. because if they did they wouldn't make such a stupid remarks..

Sometimes there are ignorant people making ignorant comments so I would ignore their negative remarks if possible... :rolleyes: Friends are for supporting your decision even tho your SO is from a foreign country or not.

I have been on this situation (kind of), not because of the GC, but people saying "Oh he could have a GF there, you don't know what's he's doing and men are always gonna be men"... :wacko: I just go the other way and have deaf ears to those kind of comments... I trust my fiancé completely.

Good luck on your journey and happy 2007! :dance:

9/14 2006 I-129F Sent Next day Air

9/15 Recieved and signed for by "Freeman" at NSC

9/19 NOA1 CSC Recieved

9/25 Notice date Check cashed 9/25

9/28 I Recieved NOA1(I-797C) in the mail

12/5 NOA2 12/6 but Approved on 12/5 touch

12/9 Received NOA2(I-797) by snail mail

12/15 NVC has received it..Case # issued...

12/19 NVC shipped to Romania

12/22 Romanian Embassy has received an email from NVC that my Petition is on it's way...

12/29 Packet 3 sent to Veronica

1/12 2007 Packet 3 received Dang Holidays..

1/22 Sending all paperwork(I-134,Bank/Employer letters etc..,)..to Veronica per DHL, 3.5lbs...$144 WOW!

1/25 Recieved notice that She needs to pick up my packet in Chisinau..

1/26 Sending Back Packet 3

2/16 Transit Visa to go to Romania for the Interview approved..

2/20 Leaves for Bucharest overnight drive by bus...

2/21 Medical

2/22 Interview !!!! APPROVED !!!!!

3/9 2007 Flight to me....

4/7 2007 Married,,,

AOS

7/27 Sent I-485, I-864, I-765

7/30 Chicago Recieved I-485,I-765

Veronica is pregant....Due 4/17/08

9/1 Recieved NOA Bio appointment letter

9/8 Recieved NOA1's for both I-485 and I-765

9/18 Bio appointment

Received Green Card.. Nov 2007

Djuliann came 4/25/2008

I-751 Lifting Of Conditions

9/8/2009 Sent I-751

Received NOA 9/21 NOA Receipt Date 9/10/2009

9/24 received Bio letter Dated 9/18

10/9 Bio Appointment

10/23 Received Permanent Resident Card

N-400 2012

Filed for citizenship sent 2/21/2012

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Netherlands
Timeline

Yeah, I am glad that my friends finally gave up and stopped their comments about how stupid and ridiculous we were for having a LDR. They understood that what Pieter and I have is serious after seeing us sharing together + also by learning how painful/long is this K-1 process...

I had to deal with their comments and disbelief for a while... But I always stood by my fiancé.

Edited by Sol-de-Verano

Our AOS Journey

July 18, 07: AOS/EAD sent to Chicago

Aug 03, 07: Received Biometrics appt. letter

Aug 23, 07: Biometrics

Aug 30, 07: Transfer to CSC letter dated 8/27

Sept 19, 07: EAD Approval email

Sept 29, 07: EAD card Received

Oct 09, 07: AOS Approved

Oct 13, 07: Green Card in hand

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: India
Timeline

Putting a new spin to this for the USC....What if the ones looking at your relationship are the parents and family you trusted all your life? This is the situation that my USC fiance finds herself in, with her family directly thinking that I am in it for:

1) the GC

2) what they termed as "trying to be attached to their family" (social status) - Indians would understand this better, but its a case where her Dad is thinking that I am a gold-digger, without even getting to know me or my family. He did not try to find out about my family, while assuming and saying to my fiance that my family must be poor.

Some background: I was working for her Dad's company when we met, and for him it was supposedly a loss of face and social standing that his daughter should get married to one of the "employees", even though my family is well-off on its own anyway. As per Indian customs (her family is Indian origin, migrated to the US 25 yrs ago), after we decided to get married, I asked my father to go down to Mumbai, where we were, and meet her Dad and her Dad refused to even meet him even though my father waited and waited for a positive response to meet.

So, my quesiton is, what would you guys/girls say to your parents and do if faced with a similar opposition from your family? Please consider that my fiance has always been very close with her parents till this, and is also dependent on them, partly, since she is managing a small company with her father.

(I understand the feeling of any Dad wanting to get his daughter married to a person who would be able to take care of her, but that is not a question since I am financilly very secure, with a bright career ahead of me)

What is really funny is that one of his reasons being that I am from Delhi - All Delhites are bad, selfish, corrupt people per her Dad you see :) (They are orginally from Mumbai - so its like a LA-NYC divide maybe)

ETA: I am also eagerly anticipating a good comment from Gupt on this....:)

Edited by Delhiguy

10-19-2006 Sent I-129

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Who are you marrying ??

Remember you and your SO are the couple...No matter what...you can't let others in your relationship...you two are the team..if you don't have this..Someone can tell you or her stuff..and ruin your life.. You have to trust your SO with your life..if you let family run your life now..imagine how it will be in the years to come...

Sorry I'm a firm beleiver that there needs to be total trust between two people.. and your SO won't every trust you if you let your family dictate your feelings..now

Putting a new spin to this for the USC....What if the ones looking at your relationship are the parents and family you trusted all your life? This is the situation that my USC fiance finds herself in, with her family directly thinking that I am in it for:

1) the GC

2) what they termed as "trying to be attached to their family" (social status) - Indians would understand this better, but its a case where her Dad is thinking that I am a gold-digger, without even getting to know me or my family. He did not try to find out about my family, while assuming and saying to my fiance that my family must be poor.

Some background: I was working for her Dad's company when we met, and for him it was supposedly a loss of face and social standing that his daughter should get married to one of the "employees", even though my family is well-off on its own anyway. As per Indian customs (her family is Indian origin, migrated to the US 25 yrs ago), after we decided to get married, I asked my father to go down to Mumbai, where we were, and meet her Dad and her Dad refused to even meet him even though my father waited and waited for a positive response to meet.

So, my quesiton is, what would you guys/girls say to your parents and do if faced with a similar opposition from your family? Please consider that my fiance has always been very close with her parents till this, and is also dependent on them, partly, since she is managing a small company with her father.

(I understand the feeling of any Dad wanting to get his daughter married to a person who would be able to take care of her, but that is not a question since I am financilly very secure, with a bright career ahead of me)

What is really funny is that one of his reasons being that I am from Delhi - All Delhites are bad, selfish, corrupt people per her Dad you see :) (They are orginally from Mumbai - so its like a LA-NYC divide maybe)

ETA: I am also eagerly anticipating a good comment from Gupt on this....:)

9/14 2006 I-129F Sent Next day Air

9/15 Recieved and signed for by "Freeman" at NSC

9/19 NOA1 CSC Recieved

9/25 Notice date Check cashed 9/25

9/28 I Recieved NOA1(I-797C) in the mail

12/5 NOA2 12/6 but Approved on 12/5 touch

12/9 Received NOA2(I-797) by snail mail

12/15 NVC has received it..Case # issued...

12/19 NVC shipped to Romania

12/22 Romanian Embassy has received an email from NVC that my Petition is on it's way...

12/29 Packet 3 sent to Veronica

1/12 2007 Packet 3 received Dang Holidays..

1/22 Sending all paperwork(I-134,Bank/Employer letters etc..,)..to Veronica per DHL, 3.5lbs...$144 WOW!

1/25 Recieved notice that She needs to pick up my packet in Chisinau..

1/26 Sending Back Packet 3

2/16 Transit Visa to go to Romania for the Interview approved..

2/20 Leaves for Bucharest overnight drive by bus...

2/21 Medical

2/22 Interview !!!! APPROVED !!!!!

3/9 2007 Flight to me....

4/7 2007 Married,,,

AOS

7/27 Sent I-485, I-864, I-765

7/30 Chicago Recieved I-485,I-765

Veronica is pregant....Due 4/17/08

9/1 Recieved NOA Bio appointment letter

9/8 Recieved NOA1's for both I-485 and I-765

9/18 Bio appointment

Received Green Card.. Nov 2007

Djuliann came 4/25/2008

I-751 Lifting Of Conditions

9/8/2009 Sent I-751

Received NOA 9/21 NOA Receipt Date 9/10/2009

9/24 received Bio letter Dated 9/18

10/9 Bio Appointment

10/23 Received Permanent Resident Card

N-400 2012

Filed for citizenship sent 2/21/2012

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: India
Timeline

Ok, Chris, to make it clearer I would like to point out that I am the male Indian fiance and I was talking about the situation with my Indian origin USC fiancee. We are facing this pressure from her family, not letting it guide our future, but we would like it to be different where our families do respect and give support to our relationship. Hence my question how anybody in the same situation would or is handling this....We do understand that it our life and our decision....

10-19-2006 Sent I-129

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
Timeline

The next time someone says something like that to me maybe I'll hand them my phone and say, "I don't know maybe she is using me for a green card, would you like to call her and ask her yourself?", then watch their face. Let me guess that they don't mind saying it to me but don't have the guts to say it to her. :lol:

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: India
Timeline
The next time someone says something like that to me maybe I'll hand them my phone and say, "I don't know maybe she is using me for a green card, would you like to call her and ask her yourself?", then watch their face. Let me guess that they don't mind saying it to me but don't have the guts to say it to her. :lol:

:thumbs::lol:

10-19-2006 Sent I-129

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Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Philippines
Timeline
My husband to be and I have been together for over 2 years, I notice that since his interview date is coming up, I seem to be getting some snide remarks from so called friends and family members, sometimes saying it jokingly that "all he wants is greencard." This is getting really annoying, anyone with experience or how to handle.

Hi JelloShotGirl! First of all Happy New Year!

Dont mind those people saying those things to you..They are just jealous with your relationship and dont want you to be happy. Just follow what your heart's desire. Prove them that they are all wrong about your fiance and love is all that matters.

Good luck and take care!

vhi

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