Filed for ROC but husband wants to divorce

[Carol & Tim 4]

Hello all,

I am the foreign spouse. Met my husband in my country in 2009. We fell in love and maintained a long distance relationship until we decided to get married in 2010. We filed for the paperwork and I got a green card in july 2011. In August, we moved to the USA (He was with me for 3 months before we flew back to the US together). I got a job in september of 2011. We moved to Hollywood where my husband wanted to go to school for music and after that my life was really hard. All he wanted to do was party and go out without me. We would fight a lot and in January 2012 I got arrested. We were fighting because the night before we was dancing with some other girls at a party in front of me and my friends and my friends were texting me next morning saying that I didnt need to go through that. He saw it and got mad. Got my phone and started a huge fight, I slapped him a couple of times. When the cops came, they only took me. I was never charged with anything but spent one night in jail, which wasnt fun at all. My mother in law bailed me out. After that, we tried many times, but my husband seems like he really doesnt want to be with me and has told me a million times that our marriage was a mistake. That he wants to be famous with his band and I am in his way because he can't do anything with me around. In fact, he was unemployed and I have been paying for all of our bills by myself, including his car, his gym and everything. Thank God now I have a great job as a Project Manager that keeps my mind busy from my crazy love life.

I love him and I really wanted us to work out and I have tried many many times. I love his family, his mom and dad treat me like their own daughter and it is devastating that i might lose them for forever. He says I am fat and he cant be married to a fat woman. I am 5'4" and 145 pounds. I am not huge and it hurts me really bad every time he calls me fat or lazy or whatever he wants to insult me when he is frustrated with something in his life.

I filed the I-751 in june 2013 and got a letter in december saying that my case got transferred and they will interview me. So far, I havent gotten an interview date yet. And I was wondering since my husband wants the divorce and me out of the house. It might not be permanent thought. Hes been having some issues with his career and feeling less man because I have a great job with a great pay and he works for minimum wage. I know it sound stupid but I still have hope that we can work our issues out together. What should I do? Contact them and let them know we might head to a divorce? Wait till my interview and go by myself and explain what happened?

I am kind scared and confused. Wish I didnt have to go through this pain but since it is not my choice I would like to know what I need to do to keep my permanent status.

Thanks a lot.

[Merrytooth 5,748]

I have read that you could convert the I-751 jointly filed to I-751 with waiver after you have gotten the divorce decree.

[Carol & Tim 4]

But we haven't filed for divorce or anything. I don't want this time to come

[Merrytooth 5,748]

I am sorry about your situation.. but since you have filed I-751 jointly, both of you have to be present for the interview.

Is your husband willing to work things out with you?

If not, converting to I-751 with waiver is the only option for you to keep your permanent status.

USCIS is not going to approve your ROC if your husband is not showing up for the interview.

Edited January 22, 2014 by Merrytooth

[Carol & Tim 4]

I don't know if he will try to work things out with me. Lately, we barely talk to each other. He is constantly with his friends (we live in a house with other 2 guys from his band) and doesnt kiss me or show me any love. But he has mentioned many times that he wants the divorce, we end up working things out and the cycle never ends. All I wanted was for him to be a good husband and care about me more than he cares about his band.

[BethAnn and Omar 42]

Nobody deserves to be insulted or made to feel bad out themselves. I understand you love this person but how in the world can you consider staying with someone who apparently has no consideration for you and who no longer wants you around? I understand that you left everything to come to this country for this person and that must be so hard. But please, please, consider ending this relationship because it just doesn't sound right to me. And btw you are NOT fat OMG.

[Carol & Tim 4]

Thanks. I know. It is just hard and complicated.