Heartfelt Advice Desperately Needed Regarding I-864

[Erica & L 52]

Hi everyone,

So I've been posting in this forum periodically over several months and my wife and I were planning to send off our I-130/I-485 package in the next week or so, but two days ago, my wife's step-dad decided to back out and now refuses to co-sponsor. He apparently made this decision over a month ago, before my I-94 expired on the 24th, and just didn't tell us. Giving no reason other than "it's not his problem" and "you two should have thought about this before you came down here (EVEN THOUGH DOMA WAS ONLY PASSED THE DAY AFTER WE ENTERED THE US, THIS WASN'T EVEN AN OPTION BEFORE JUNE 26TH) and other versions of "I just don't support this" obviously referring to the fact that we are the same-sex and he has all of a sudden had some sort of revelation because it was originally my wife's mother who convinced him to do it.

As you can probably assume, I'm so angry and upset that I am shaking and I honestly don't know what to do. We have nobody else that would be willing to co-sign, we've asked other members of my wife's family but they are all too enriched in their faith to believe our marriage is worth supporting. Anyone who would want to help us doesn't make enough money or have enough assets.

Because I've already over-stayed my I-94, I can't go back to Canada unless I want to be banned entry from the US for over-staying my B2 visa and did not pursue immigration. I can't bring my wife with me and immigrate there because her DUI makes her inadmissible to Canada because it's only been 4 years and not 5 since the incident happened. If I stay here I can't work, neither of us can go back to school, and we can't move on with our lives because someone who claims to "care about our happiness" completely just screwed us over. If he had told us this a month ago, we maybe could have gone back to Canada for a bit, and then returned, but now we literally have no options it feels like.

I am absolutely devastated and I know this is a personal case and I'm not really sure what I'm expecting by making this thread but if ANYONE has gone through this or have any advice or tips or if there is some way to work around the system that I have overlooked, PLEASE let me know, I really don't know what else to do at this point.

[Hypnos 6,578]

Sorry to hear of this. Unfortunately there is no way around needing an I-864 in this instance. Can your wife perhaps qualify on assets alone? She would need to demonstrate around $60,000 in assets if her income was $0.

On the plus side, Canadians usually do not overstay unless USCIS or an immigration judge makes that determination (it's like having an I-94 endorsed "D/S" without actually having one). You may have no ban if you depart expeditiously, although you should consult an experienced immigration attorney before you take this drastic step. Either way, that still won't solve the underlying problem of having no I-864, and without your US citizen spouse meeting the requirements herself, you will require a joint sponsor or you won't be able to immigrate.

Edited December 31, 2013 by Hypnos

[Erica & L 52]

Sorry to hear of this. Unfortunately there is no way around needing an I-864 in this instance. Can your wife perhaps qualify on assets alone? She would need to demonstrate around $60,000 in assets if her income was $0.

On the plus side, Canadians usually do not overstay unless USCIS or an immigration judge makes that determination (it's like having an I-94 endorsed "D/S" without actually having one). You may have no ban if you depart expeditiously, although you should consult an experienced immigration attorney before you take this drastic step. Either way, that still won't solve the underlying problem of having no I-864, and without your US citizen spouse meeting the requirements herself, you will require a joint sponsor or you won't be able to immigrate.

She has no assets other than her car which can't claim since it is her only vehicle. Last year she only made around 12K.

Regarding the overstay, I had read in several forums that overstay is forgiven to the spouse of a USC IF they do AOS, but until they actually receive their GC, to stay put or risk a ban. Thus we can't even go up there for 6 months and come back because she will be allowed entry, but I won't. Not to mention I wouldn't be able to support both of us on one income being that where I'm from in Canada (Vancouver) the cost of living in extremely high. If we went to more affordable province, it'd be a big risk to not know anyone or have anything to fall back on. As much as I'd like to consult with an immigration attourney, we barely have enough money to file these forms, it's taken us several months to save up this amount as it is.

I have a few people that were going to look into it, but even if they do qualify, it would be right on the poverty line for 2 people and I've read about people getting RFEs for that because they're cutting it too close for comfort in the eyes of the government.

My wife's mom has the house half in her name, but she hasn't worked in 25 years and her husband files her as a dependent and with the way he is acting, that would cause a lot of upset if she was too demand copies of the forms for this purpose, let alone if that could even work as an option.

I just feel like we've worked so hard and this is so defeating...

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

As said before there is no way to get past the I864 requirement. The person signing can be any US citizen or permanent resident ( although personally I would never sign for anyone other than my husband or a blood relative ) You will never have status in the US without overcoming this and would be deportable even if you are married. If you find a cosigner the household size would be their family plus you your spouse as a USC is not included in the equation. Not being familiar with Canadian law could you reverse the process and move there to be together ?

[Erica & L 52]

As said before there is no way to get past the I864 requirement. The person signing can be any US citizen or permanent resident ( although personally I would never sign for anyone other than my husband or a blood relative ) You will never have status in the US without overcoming this and would be deportable even if you are married. If you find a cosigner the household size would be their family plus you your spouse as a USC is not included in the equation. Not being familiar with Canadian law could you reverse the process and move there to be together ?

Yeah, I'm not looking to stay here out of status without AOS for any longer than I have to. If I have to put a plea out for someone to help us out, like a friend or a family friend etc, I will. It just sucks because some of my relatives would be willing to do it and they are all Canadian citizens so they can't. As well as a bunch of other USC that just don't meet the financial requirements and the one person who can is giving us the run-around.

I have to do anything I can to find a co-sponsor because going back to Canada is not an option right now with my wife's DUI charge. It makes her inadmissible for 5 years and it's only been about 4 since the time of the incident.

[christeen 966]

Perhaps reach out to the LGBT community? Since immigration privileges are recently allowed, you might find a lot of support from the community? Is there a LGBT center or community outreach? Anyone who is a LPR or USC can file?

[Erica & L 52]

I didn't think about that, thank you! I believe there is one in the next city over, I currently live in a smallish town in Alabama so the LGBT community centers, as you can imagine, are a little more limited

I've had some people reach out over Facebook but it's more of a matter of them actually qualifying, I'm just considering all my options at this point.

[Darnell 8,479]

you might get some a$$i$$stance if you post a gofundme project and link it through your facebook account. I wouldn't think a sponser would step up from that exposure, though.

---

I understand your issues about time and timing, however -

would it make sense, at all, for her to get a higher paying job, then file all 3 or 4 months later, with her being the ONLY sponser ?

whats her numbers look like, for:

TY 2012, filed in 2013 and

TY 2013, to be filed in 2014 and

projected annual income for 2014 ??

Edited January 1, 2014 by Darnell

[Erica & L 52]

you might get some a$$i$$stance if you post a gofundme project and link it through your facebook account. I wouldn't think a sponser would step up from that exposure, though.

---

I understand your issues about time and timing, however -

would it make sense, at all, for her to get a higher paying job, then file all 3 or 4 months later, with her being the ONLY sponser ?

whats her numbers look like, for:

TY 2012, filed in 2013 and

TY 2013, to be filed in 2014 and

projected annual income for 2014 ??

She is training to become a manager at her job, but she works a Papa Johns and you don't paid very well a manager but better than a driver, which is what she's doing now. She's been trying for several months to find a better paying job but we live in a small town with very little options job wise, and we can't move right now to a better city because we can't afford it on just her income. We are renting her mom's in-laws suite, a separate part of her house, but they're moving to Texas to be with her step-dad, and we were going to move to Portland. So that's why we wanted to send off in the next two weeks, because that gives us the 30-90 days and a little bit more to allow time for work authorization so we can move once they move, otherwise we will have no place to live. They're moving in about 5-6 months so even if she could find a better paying job and work there for 3-4 months, it wouldn't work with our timeline.

I have no idea what her numbers will be in 2014 because we will hopefully be in Portland, Oregon and not in the south anymore, with a higher minimum wage. Once she gets this manager job it only pays around 8-9/hr, but that will only be for the next 5-6 month.

[Darnell 8,479]

ok - i see 2 options for today.

1. wait. don't file till march or april of 2014.

2. file now with just her as the sponser. expect an RFE later, about 5 months after filing. she'll have 30 to 60 days to respond to it.

[Erica & L 52]

ok - i see 2 options for today.

1. wait. don't file till march or april of 2014.

2. file now with just her as the sponser. expect an RFE later, about 5 months after filing. she'll have 30 to 60 days to respond to it.

If I wait though, we will have no place to go/live if we both can't have an income.

If we file now, would she get the RFE after I get my work authorization or will we just have to wait 5 months, without work authorization, until they send us off the RFE?

I have a few weeks to try and find someone if our timeline and planning is to work out, I really want to avoid any RFEs if possible.

Edited January 1, 2014 by justfromerica

[N-o-l-a 7,168]

Yeah, I'm not looking to stay here out of status without AOS for any longer than I have to. If I have to put a plea out for someone to help us out, like a friend or a family friend etc, I will. It just sucks because some of my relatives would be willing to do it and they are all Canadian citizens so they can't. As well as a bunch of other USC that just don't meet the financial requirements and the one person who can is giving us the run-around.

I have to do anything I can to find a co-sponsor because going back to Canada is not an option right now with my wife's DUI charge. It makes her inadmissible for 5 years and it's only been about 4 since the time of the incident.

I know a year seems like forever, but I think Canada is a great option if you can't get the co-sponsor thing going. We had a similar issue with living with my husband in Denmark and it needing to be 3 years from something. I ended up living there bordering on legality under my EU rights, but I do think you'll both feel better if you have full legal status in whatever country even if you are apart. Trust me, if your marriage is strong you'll make it and be stronger for it.

[Erica & L 52]

I know a year seems like forever, but I think Canada is a great option if you can't get the co-sponsor thing going. We had a similar issue with living with my husband in Denmark and it needing to be 3 years from something. I ended up living there bordering on legality under my EU rights, but I do think you'll both feel better if you have full legal status in whatever country even if you are apart. Trust me, if your marriage is strong you'll make it and be stronger for it.

I just can't imagine being away from her, and I know everyone says that, but I really can't even wrap my mind around that as an option if I can do everything in my power to be able to stay here.

Honestly, my wife loves Canada a lot more than the US, and I love it just because my friends and a few of my family members I actually talk to are there, but realistically, until we are older and have careers, living in the US is the best option financially and for us to go to school at a more affordable rate. We just really want to get our lives started and move to the west coast and this is just such a road bump.

One of my wife's managers just told her that he'd look over everything and see if maybe he can do it, so I'm about to send him an email with all the details. I know a lot of people want to help, but I also know a lot of people are really private about their information, even though in my opinion, it's no different than sending in your tax information to the government. That's my biggest concern and that's why we wanted to keep it "within the family" but now have to explore other people as options.

[Darnell 8,479]

ya, i am really uncertain if the EAD would be issued with an RFE on the I-864.

[NikLR 13,232]

Okay the cool thing is that they can send you in the I-864 with all the information in a sealed envelope to which you won't open and send onward to the USCIS. Let them open the envelope. If the concern is privacy vs wanting to actually help and understanding what that means.