Do you and your fiance(e) have a large age difference?

[Peikko 1,575]

As many have said, it's not so much age in and of itself that's the problem (potentially) but rather the bi products of having lived longer than a much younger partner. All kind of things from sexual experience, through to watching different television programmes as children. Not to mention the almost certainty that the younger partner will have to nurse an older partner through age related illnesses for a greater or lesser amount of time.

None of this matters of course if both parties are aware of the potential issues and are prepared to face them together. Love can conquer most things...except death, sadly.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

back on old age i found these:

We do not stop playing because we are old, we grow old because we stop playing. Four secrets to staying young, being happy, achieving success, laugh and find humor every day and dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.

So many people walking around who are dead, there is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

Anybody can grow older, that doesn't take any talent or ability, the idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change, HAVE NO REGRETS

The elderly usually dont have regrets for what they did, but rather for things they did not do, its never to late.

Remember growing older is mandatory, growing up is optional.

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

A good friend of mine who is only 36 buried his dear wife this year - they were about 6 months apart in age.

[Fandango 1,439]

I don't neccessarily disagree with a large age differential, it's when the younger partner is SO young. 40 & 60 is a bit different than 18 & 38. And again, the parenting aspect gives me the heebie jeebies

[Peikko 1,575]

Sorry if the implication seemed to be that death is restricted to the elderly. My comment about death was merely that, love can fly in the face of just about every prejudice imaginable. Death comes to us all.

[Reynaldo 0]

I don't neccessarily disagree with a large age differential, it's when the younger partner is SO young. 40 & 60 is a bit different than 18 & 38. And again, the parenting aspect gives me the heebie jeebies

Amen...

Edited December 22, 2006 by Reynaldo

[mawilson 2,133]

Jesus Christ, no!

Even if he is inexperienced, that is still wrong....

Why do you think it's "wrong"? What if the 50-year-old man had only had one

or two sexual partners in his lifetime and the 15-year girl in question was a #######

who had slept with 20 guys in her class? How about a 50 year old man and

a 20-year-old virgin? Which scenario do you prefer?

[Sofiyya 1,687]

Age is not a good indicator of maturity. I knew a 20-year-old girl who looked like a 12-year-old

and was totally clueless about sex. At the same time, there are 15-year-olds who are quite mature

and I don't see why they shouldn't be allowed to have sex.

Then, those 15 year olds shouldn't expect anyone else to support the babies they make, except, perhaps, those of you who believe sex is ok for them. Rights come with responsibilities. 15 year olds don't often get that, and people who support minors having sex often don't either, it seems.

[

I'm actually NOT saying there is a black and a white in this situation. But what I am saying is that I feel my opinion is right for me My opinions govern my life and how I live it. And that holds true for everyone here too. 'My perspective is my reality'...yanno? No one's going to believe in his/her own opinion and at the same time feel it is wrong. And calling someone a bigot really does nothing to change anything...it's not going to make someone say 'yanno what? you're right!'....it only starts off a #######-for-tat situation & makes it appear that people with differing opinions don't have the right to have them.

But if there's no right or wrong, then who is to say what is rational and what is not. Bottom line: do what makes you happy & don't worry about what anyone else thinks. There will always be people who don't support you, but they don't matter

If you opinion is right for you and your perspective is your reality, then you will respect the fact that my opinion is right for me and my opinion is my reality. I call bigots out when I see them. If it changes their mind, fine. If it doesn't, oh well. My responsibility is to point out what I see as a prejudice and I have no problem doing so. That's my reality. The politically correct moral relativists respect that. Thay can hardly say less without being hypocrites, since all opinions are equal and legitimate (to them).

[garya505 2]

Isn't calling someone a bigot because they differ in opinions a lil bigoted in and of itself?

No.

NAMBLA is a real organization that believes that children want to have sex with adults. It is not a South Park invention.

The issue of growing old and who will get sick first is a ####### shoot just like anything else. In an age difference relationship, the younger person could be hurt, contract a chronic, debilitating illness or die before the older one. Stuff happens. Older people are living longer, looking younger, and remaining healthier now than at any other time. I've been a body builder all of my life (it's a common hobby in my family. Thank you, Jack Lalane!). We are not all our grandparents generation, although my grandparents gave me great genes. My grandmother turned 100 this year and my grandfather died of old age at 101. The youngest person in my family who died of natural causes was 86.

My first husband and I were both 18 when we married. He died of cancer six years ago. Our dreams of growing old together stopped there. My attitude is that there are no guarantees in this life as to whom will outlast whom, so why worry about that? Some young people I know are old from stress and worry. Who needs that? Enjoy and spread joy! As Jonathan Swift said, May you live all the days of your life. Thank God, there are those of us who believe that way!

Thank you. Your posts continue to impress me.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

Thank you!

[Fandango 1,439]

[

I'm actually NOT saying there is a black and a white in this situation. But what I am saying is that I feel my opinion is right for me My opinions govern my life and how I live it. And that holds true for everyone here too. 'My perspective is my reality'...yanno? No one's going to believe in his/her own opinion and at the same time feel it is wrong. And calling someone a bigot really does nothing to change anything...it's not going to make someone say 'yanno what? you're right!'....it only starts off a #######-for-tat situation & makes it appear that people with differing opinions don't have the right to have them.

But if there's no right or wrong, then who is to say what is rational and what is not. Bottom line: do what makes you happy & don't worry about what anyone else thinks. There will always be people who don't support you, but they don't matter

If you opinion is right for you and your perspective is your reality, then you will respect the fact that my opinion is right for me and my opinion is my reality. I call bigots out when I see them. If it changes their mind, fine. If it doesn't, oh well. My responsibility is to point out what I see as a prejudice and I have no problem doing so. That's my reality. The politically correct moral relativists respect that. Thay can hardly say less without being hypocrites, since all opinions are equal and legitimate (to them).

You've completely missed my point....as for the bits in red, you'll see that you've basically reiterated what I was saying, so there's no disagreement there.

[mawilson 2,133]

Age is not a good indicator of maturity. I knew a 20-year-old girl who looked like a 12-year-old

and was totally clueless about sex. At the same time, there are 15-year-olds who are quite mature

and I don't see why they shouldn't be allowed to have sex.

Then, those 15 year olds shouldn't expect anyone else to support the babies they make, except, perhaps, those of you who believe sex is ok for them. Rights come with responsibilities. 15 year olds don't often get that, and people who support minors having sex often don't either, it seems.

You're introducing another factor - babies. We were just talking about sex.

I'm not advocating sex with minors, BTW, I'm just saying that age is not the ONLY factor

that should be taken into consideration.

[garya505 2]

I think the logical defense of that statement is that an 18 year old should not be prosecuted for having consensual sex with his/her 16-17 year old boyfriend/girlfriend

Agreed

But a 50 yo with a 15 yo is just... wrong...

Even if the 50 year old is a virgin?

Even if the 50 year old is a female virgin?

[Sofiyya 1,687]

You've completely missed my point....as for the bits in red, you'll see that you've basically reiterated what I was saying, so there's no disagreement there.

Great!

Edited December 22, 2006 by szsz

[garya505 2]

Oh man did this thread ever get derailed!