long distance relationship struggles

[KTichUsZim 3]

I wanted to ask or survey so to speak, how many of you,(K1) and me, deal with no seeing your fiancee for months at a time?

I met my fiancee Sept 2012 on Facebook, it didn't take us long yo fall in love, February 2013 was our first face to face meeting, it was like being with an old friend, I returned again in May and became engaged, (no Ring But tattoos of our names over our heart) I've gone to see him 2 other times, once with my son, so as you all may know this becomes very expensive.

The question here is phone calls and texting isn't always enough, or even possible, due to time difference, work schedule, and expenses, how do you keep from fighting or feeling completely miserable going through this?

My fiancee and I know we love each other, its the distance between us and this process that gets in our way, and causes us to just lose it!

Have anyone here experienced this too?

KTich ♥

[Trisha89 36]

I wanted to ask or survey so to speak, how many of you,(K1) and me, deal with no seeing your fiancee for months at a time?

I met my fiancee Sept 2012 on Facebook, it didn't take us long yo fall in love, February 2013 was our first face to face meeting, it was like being with an old friend, I returned again in May and became engaged, (no Ring But tattoos of our names over our heart) I've gone to see him 2 other times, once with my son, so as you all may know this becomes very expensive.

The question here is phone calls and texting isn't always enough, or even possible, due to time difference, work schedule, and expenses, how do you keep from fighting or feeling completely miserable going through this?

My fiancee and I know we love each other, its the distance between us and this process that gets in our way, and causes us to just lose it!

Have anyone here experienced this too?

KTich ♥

I can TOTALLY understand you to 1000% and I agree with you....

Well, already today we have a hard day again because I was complaining to much about this situation in that we are and was also too much frustrated,.... It isn't helpfull but it's making me sick inside.... :'-(.

I wish nothing else as to finally be with him, I don't need more time with family and friends!

I'm here since 6 months and we can only see us when he is visiting me, because i can't travel to him anymore :-C!

This process is killing me inside....

We are telephoning a lot via the app "viber" that's a free telephone app when the other one has it too or we write a lot via "what's app".

I am always (every day) up or sleep iregular times so that we can talk. Our time difference is 7 hours...

All i can tell you is like many others here to be strong also if it's hard. We all miss our loved one so much, maybe some more as others.

Good luck for you.

[belle + eli 1]

long distance relationships arent easy... it takes more outta u that one may think, and to keep the relationship going you need to learn special skills (balancing your time schedules, not sleeping, learning to deal with the frustration of being apart, giving in during fights, coz lets face it, its a waste of time fighting over the fone or on skype when u have so limited talk time together, etc).....everyone here can attest to that... you are not alone

the good news, no matter how long it takes, once u are finally together, those struggles you have overcome would keep ur relationship stronger

[Mel&Lal 12]

Yes I agree. Our relationship was much easier when we skyped everyday but since his laptop died on us all we have is telephone converastations and when he is at work he will message me on facebook. Going to India is expensive for both of us and I just can't take off of work. I think all the misunderstandings is part of the distance. I find I have to keep faith and keep pushing for the future, knowing and having faith that this is only a temp and he will be here and we can start our life.

[KTichUsZim 3]

Oh my I'm not alone with this terrible situation!!!

Every other week we are struggling to keep focused, I had wondered reading the interview process, and on going evidence part, our nessages haven't been so sweet lately, lol and I never hear anyone state how these types of relationships are a struggle. If I could tell you the money i've spent to see him in Africa every two to three months..

I thank you for responding, I don't feel so bad knowing maybe we all struggle just a little with overseas relationships, and it doesn't mean we don't love them or they us, its just the government that keeps us apart.

[Mel&Lal 12]

Yes, I understand why there is a process for this but at the same time it makes me mad. I believe if the person has a clean background and is not part of some extreme group, they should be allowed in this counntry to be with loved ones.......it urkes me that somebody is going to say your relationship is either true or fraud and then cause more tension then there already is.

[KTichUsZim 3]

Exactly!!! How much proof do I need to submit, reading private messages, pictures, asking who knows what..

Bank account, ect. I just miss my man, and these holidays coming I'm especially depressed.

I just need couping strategies I guess talking about it who understand these experiences helos a lot, thanks for the feedback

[Mel&Lal 12]

No problem anytime....no better way to let your frustation out to somebody who knows what you are going though.

[altonbebe 48]

Skype, Skype, and more Skype.

Skype is a long distance relationship's best friend.

Bear (Bebe) and I are together EVERY DAY. There is NO day that goes by without us seeing one another.

I watch her when she sleeps, she watches me when I sleep.

There was a period of 2 weeks when her net book went bad. I tried to hold off on buying another lap top. We are close to our interview.

No freaking way man, that lasted about 2 weeks. She is now the proad owner of a NEW laptop.

It was way too hard not seeing each other.

I will tell you that "WE" have it easy compared to 30, heck, 20 years ago.

30 years ago you did calls and regular mail.

20 years ago you did calls and email.

10 years ago you did calls and limited video chat

Now you do calls and video chats on our smart phones depending on where you live.

Edited November 28, 2013 by altonbebe

[jgoodman 8]

What altonbebe said!!

Skype, Skype and more Skype!

My Honey watches me work in my office and sometimes when I sleep and I watch her sleeping while I am working. I like to think I am watching over her. Our time difference is currently 13 hours which makes it very hard but at least we can see each other almost every day.

[KTichUsZim 3]

I wish I could skype with my sweetie, internet in south Africa is $#!/, we barely can get what's app to work properly, he's working long hours and the communication is becoming non existent and straining our relationship even more. Even today we broke up to make up all over again, it's not we don't love each other, it's the distance between us. I'm scheduled to go meet his family in January for his birthday, and I can't wait!!!

[NikLR 13,227]

Look forward to the things you enjoy vs complaining about the time apart. It's very hard. Most of us on VJ know the difficulties. Send him emails or letters. Packages with love notes and gifts. Leave a msg on the phone and share some important detail of your day. Be thankful you have someone in your life that is worth all this effort. Figure out what you two will do when he's finally in the USA as well. It's not an easy adjustment. Even coming from Canada I have things to adjust to that make me want to go back.

[ash&ot2012 3]

yes, I can agree these holiday times do make it hard for couples who just want to lay by their love side and watch the holiday all time favorite movies. But I want u guys and gals to know anything worth having is never easy so continue to fight for your loves

[AugstAngelFelix 5]

Well I also met my fiancé thanx to facebook. We first met in February 2013 as well and became engaged shortly after. Yes it's tough waiting through the process. But well worth the wait I think skype is better than calls or texting plus it's free that's the tool we used and writing letters and emails to each other and Facebook posts. The visits Inbetween also help. The main thing is when you can talk abkut how you two feel and things will be ok and time will fly and you two will be together before you you know it. My fiancé and I only skype in my eairly mornings as well as his for 30 minutes to 3 hours depending how we work. I wish you the best of luck! ❤️❤️❤️?

[ash&ot2012 3]

Only the strong survive