FRUSTRATED ..THIS MIGHT BE THE END OF MY JOURNEY

[VICTORIOUS876 0]

Hi VJ ever since I've been on this site you guys have helped me a lot and I want to thank you all. you guys are a blessing... now to my story:

My journey started on Feb 22 2013 when my step mom filed the i130, It was approved there after and while at NVC we got a check list because she didn't put the date on the AOS form! Finally it was approved. On the day of the interview, the CO said that everything was OK but just two small problems...My dad put his name on my Birth Certificate 7 years after I was born and so because Jamaica is a High Fraud country he needed proof of relationship.Thank fully he didn't request DNA instead he asked for me to get pictures of me and my dad together. The only pic I had with my dad was when he was holding me when I was a baby, sadly he has been looking for it and cannot find it...The CO also requested that I get a form from my school with my dad name on it... that I have.. he also needed Joint sponsor and that I have.. Right now I don't know what to do... because sadly I don't have the money to do DNA and i'm afraid he might NOT be my dad and then everything would go to waste.. I don't know what to do... I'm depressed ! Thank you all for reading and Have a great journey

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

US family immigration is for family reunification. If you don't have a relationship with your father, then you are not eligible for a visa. Certainly if he is not your real father, it will not work, either. Have you spent any time with him?

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

It is extremely unusual not to have any photos with your dad.... is it just that YOU don;t have any, or that you have never met him after you were a baby? If it is the first, reach out to family and friends to see if they have any photos.

[VICTORIOUS876 0]

It is extremely unusual not to have any photos with your dad.... is it just that YOU don;t have any, or that you have never met him after you were a baby? If it is the first, reach out to family and friends to see if they have any photos.

We had some photos but they got misplaced and we cannot find them, but II'll ask family and friends. Thanks

[Extreme happiness 9]

I understand how you feel because I maybe had one pic of myself with my dad when i was growing up and like you I have no idea where that pic was...I guess maybe because he wasn't in my life I really never care....however regarding your fear that he might not be your father...have you talked to your mom about this?...you should and if she can guarantee you that he is your father then you shouldn't worry.....you also said you don't have the money for the DNA....can't your dad or your step mom help you with that?....and as to the fear that he might not be your dad and you would have done this all in vain...how about you think about the positive side of this and say if he turn out to be your dad then you can finalize this long drawn out journey and it will then all be worth it....think positive and just continue on the journey....don't give up until there is nothing else left for you to do...nothing beat a trial but a failure.......do all you can do so in the end you can say you tried your very best....best of luck on your continued journey.

[Pinkrlion 2,724]

It is extremely unusual not to have any photos with your dad.... is it just that YOU don;t have any, or that you have never met him after you were a baby? If it is the first, reach out to family and friends to see if they have any photos.

It is not that simple. My husband does not have any pictures of him or his family as they were destroyed by Hurricane Gilbert, along with a lot of other personal possessions.

[OKflyboy 35]

Not having pictures is not unusual. My family did not have a camera when I was a kid, and the few ones that were taken by a professional photographer got destroyed in a fire.

Can someone sign an affidavit stating that your dad is your dad? Any other proof that he took care of you? Pictures are not proof enough of biological relationship, really. If DoS wants proof that he is your father de facto, you may find friends or family who will state so.

[Eric-Pris 1,607]

DNA costs about $500, give or take. Are you saying that you can't come up with $500? How are you going to support him if he does come if you can't even come up with $500?

Honestly, it sounds like you don't want the DNA test because there's a good chance that he's not your father. Wouldn't you want to know that also, even if it does end the immigration question? Is it all about immigration? Is that so important?

[KazuriSana 324]

It is extremely unusual not to have any photos with your dad.... is it just that YOU don;t have any, or that you have never met him after you were a baby? If it is the first, reach out to family and friends to see if they have any photos.

It is actually possible that no photos exist, especially of poor folks in the much poorer countries. Until very recently photos were a luxury only afforded by the very very very well off- until the advent of the camera phone. My husband is 43 and from Kenya, and has no photo as a kid with his dad or mama. In fact, his father died in 1995 and there is no existing photo of my husband with his father.

[Virtuous45 31]

DNA costs about $500, give or take. Are you saying that you can't come up with $500? How are you going to support him if he does come if you can't even come up with $500?

Honestly, it sounds like you don't want the DNA test because there's a good chance that he's not your father. Wouldn't you want to know that also, even if it does end the immigration question? Is it all about immigration? Is that so important?

Eric-Pris,

I don't think you need to be that personal. You cannot say "Honestly" unless you know her personally, familiar with her case, and know that she is hiding something. DNA may cost $500 but that $500 could probably go towards something else that she may need to pay for to see her case

completed. I know for me, US$500 is approx. JA$50,000. That is not easy to come up with when the clock is working against you.

I agree with Extremehappiness. Being negative is only going to make you even more depressed. Look at the positive side...if the CO wanted a DNA test, they would have asked you to do it and bring back the results...then you would have no choice but to do it. Talk to relatives and see if someone can produce pictures, or would be willing to write and AoS for you. Think positive my dear.

[Eric-Pris 1,607]

Eric-Pris,

I don't think you need to be that personal. You cannot say "Honestly" unless you know her personally, familiar with her case, and know that she is hiding something. DNA may cost $500 but that $500 could probably go towards something else that she may need to pay for to see her case

completed. I know for me, US$500 is approx. JA$50,000. That is not easy to come up with when the clock is working against you.

Do you know what it means when somebody says "Honestly, it sounds like...." referring to something? Obviosuly not.

I'm not claiming to know some "aboslute truth" about her or her sitaution. I think you see the word "honestly" and think truth. It's ok, I'll give you a pass since you're a foreigner.

[KazuriSana 324]

Do you know what it means when somebody says "Honestly, it sounds like...." referring to something? Obviosuly not.

I'm not claiming to know some "aboslute truth" about her or her sitaution. I think you see the word "honestly" and think truth. It's ok, I'll give you a pass since you're a foreigner.

Was the 'foreigner' bit necessary? In any case, many 'foreigners' write and speak American English much better - and by far, than a lot of Americans. For example, you did not care much about your English to proof your post. Let us discuss issues and assist each other around here with humility and consideration.

[bigdog 376]

Mikey - I hope this all works out for you.

[VICTORIOUS876 0]

I understand how you feel because I maybe had one pic of myself with my dad when i was growing up and like you I have no idea where that pic was...I guess maybe because he wasn't in my life I really never care....however regarding your fear that he might not be your father...have you talked to your mom about this?...you should and if she can guarantee you that he is your father then you shouldn't worry.....you also said you don't have the money for the DNA....can't your dad or your step mom help you with that?....and as to the fear that he might not be your dad and you would have done this all in vain...how about you think about the positive side of this and say if he turn out to be your dad then you can finalize this long drawn out journey and it will then all be worth it....think positive and just continue on the journey....don't give up until there is nothing else left for you to do...nothing beat a trial but a failure.......do all you can do so in the end you can say you tried your very best....best of luck on your continued journey.

Extreme Happiness I thank you so much for your kind words. My dad and I fortunately live together but we never see it necessary to take any photos together as I'm not the " fussy type " I have features of him and I will stop think negative about our biological relationship. As it relates to the monetary side of it.. my step mom unfortunately does not make enough money and I've used up all my savings during this process. My dad has his financial matters to take care of BUT this morning.. I prayed to God and I've asked him to bring me through and I know with God everything is possible. Guys Thanks a lot

PS VJ: I'm a male and my step mom and dad have been taking care of me since I was about 1 year as my mom was in the hospital and couldn't. My mom later died when I was about 4 or 5 years.

Mikey - I hope this all works out for you.

Thank you so much for your kind words

[VICTORIOUS876 0]

Eric-Pris,

I don't think you need to be that personal. You cannot say "Honestly" unless you know her personally, familiar with her case, and know that she is hiding something. DNA may cost $500 but that $500 could probably go towards something else that she may need to pay for to see her case

completed. I know for me, US$500 is approx. JA$50,000. That is not easy to come up with when the clock is working against you.

I agree with Extremehappiness. Being negative is only going to make you even more depressed. Look at the positive side...if the CO wanted a DNA test, they would have asked you to do it and bring back the results...then you would have no choice but to do it. Talk to relatives and see if someone can produce pictures, or would be willing to write and AoS for you. Think positive my dare.

Virtuous45 I thank you for your kind words and I will make sure that I remove the negative and retain the positive. Eric-Pris: Thank you for responding. It's not that easy to come up with US $500.00 BUT I will continue to pray that everything works in my favor . I thank you all