How to set a wedding date (during a K-1 process)?

[Mari26 19]

Hi!

We are about to file the I-129f form next week, and I was wondering if any of you could give me some advice regarding the wedding date.

I originally planned to start figuring it out once I actually had the visa, even though if I know 90 days is not enough time to plan it (Specially since I have NO clue how weddings are in the US). After reading some posts around the forum I've noticed some people already have dates.

I have my college graduation on June, and some sort of wedding blessing/farewell party here in September. So, it can not be before that.

Anyway, would anyone mind to share how did you decided on a date? Did you actually hired locations and contacted providers, or did you wait until you actually had the visa on hand?

I just don't understand how on earth am I supposed to organize a wedding in 90 days, and on top of that in a different state where I'll be living.

Anyway, thank you SO much for you replies in advance

-Mari-

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

Don't make any plans until the visa is in your hands.

[Pitaya 2,577]

Agree with Harpa.

[del-11-03-13-3 11]

You could make plans and just wait up to 6 months to use the visa, but do you really want to wait that long apart just for a wedding? What I'm doing and I'm sure a lot others do too is have a quick courthouse wedding to make it legal then have the ceremony later. K1 is stressful enough let alone trying to plan a wedding and hoping the date you picked works out.

[clem 2]

Hey Mari

I have compared my waiting times with people on this forum and it can greatly vary....

In my situation I have waited way more than many people...

It's always difficult not to plan because you want your life to move on... but oh well!

Either you set no date at all

or since you can not set a date for the 'legal wedding' you set a very late date for the religious wedding.

you will then go with your fiance to the county clerck office for the marriage license

and then celebrate with your family and friends way later with another ceremony....

Good luck!

[cristi1231 4]

It definitely varies like everyone is saying, but I have seen rare occasions of visa processes going more than a year. We applied August 2 of this year, 2013, and in my head I have August 15 of 2014 is a wonderful wedding date.

So I'm planning what I can around that. I havent booked or bought anything excepted my wedding dress.

Back in September after a month of sending our petition I was definitely freaking out wondering if I would be one of those rare cases that would take more than a year. I kept telling myself that I WOULD be the one to get that back luck haha.

But our petition has been being processed unsually fast!

So what I did is I researched. Look into several different locations, ask them what their cancelation policies are or what their policies are on moving the date. Most venues are ok with that with no fee as long as it's a date that they aren't booked. If you ever have to re-book and it's more than the 3 months allowance, you can always get married in court and do the religious when they are available!

I figured, if you're going to spend the money anyways, it's okay to book when you're 90% sure if they'll allow you to move the date with no fee as needed.

For wedding invites, I'm designing them and I just won't send them until my fiance is here with me with two months in advance. We just won't do save the dates to be cautious. probably just tell close friends and family by word of mouth to "save the month".

In the meantime I'm all about do-it-yourself so I can start with decorations and store them at home, especially if I go with fake flowers.

There's so much you can do while you wait without actually committing to a date. Definitely set a goal at least a year from now for you and your fiance and pray the process goes smoothly.

Like I said it's been going so smooth for us, in 3 months, our petition is already at the embassy and all we are waiting for is for my fiance to set up his interview date. Personally I'm going to start making final plans once we have an interview date. I already feel comfortable enough with the venues I have and the people I'm working with to trust them enough to accomodate me.

But like everyone is saying, it will vary and don't do anything if you're not so sure or comfortable. That's just all what's working for me so far. Take it a step at a time and after you send your petition, the best thing you can do is research! Especially before you get your NOA2 and you have to start researching the next step for that, get wedding research out of the way as soon as you can so you won't go insane

[Kiwinyc 62]

We picked a vague date but that was all. If you're trying to do something big it needs to be pretty far out, but the truth is the process makes it difficult if you want to have the typical wedding of your dreams. i think most people compromise in some way because you cant confirm anything until you have visa in hand. After tossing out several other ideas we're going to Vegas.

[Mari26 19]

Thank you everyone for your replies.

We will just wait until we get our NOA2 and then start doing some research. Probably won't book anything until I've gotten the visa.

Just thought it was so weird to see people that already had dates xD!

-Mari-

[Camelot13 63]

I'm also going the route of having a courthouse wedding so that it can fit around the approval of the visa. Then once we're married and able to stay in the same country, we will start planning a wedding with our family and friends which will probably take place a year or 1.5 years after the courthouse date. It's just way too much for us to spend money visiting each other this year, file the paperwork, and plan our wedding all at the same time (I think I would explode from stress) so this seemed like a great option.

[kc247 22]

Lots of people say not to until the visa is in your hands. We are setting a date a few weeks after the interview, because chances are everything will go fine. But we aren't having a big fancy wedding. We aren't renting a place or anything so if it can't be that date, it isn't a huge deal. We will be sending out invites though, but everyone will know there is a slight change that date could change, and we will let them know if it does. So, do whatever you want just remember there IS a chance something could go wrong. But I would definitely wait until you have an interview date.

[jola83 19]

You could always find a few venues of choice and explain your situation and ask if they would be ok with you changing the date if need be,the venue we are getting married at was fine with it as long as we put a deposit down.my finances family had booked the venue as a surprise for me and actually changed the date twice before I even knew about it ,it was once our file reached London we started making other plans regarding the wedding such as hair and make up ,invites etc .many people go with the courthouse wedding and then if you want the big ceremony you could always book that for a latter date so that you have plenty of time to plan it,your friends and family have enough warning to be there and you know you will definitely make it on time.

Even though things have worked out for me the end and it looks like I'll make it in time for my wedding date.it has been very stressful as up til a few weeks ago I thought I was going to have to inform everyone who I'd invited there would be a change in date ,I really don't recommend making wedding plans for a big ceremony before you have your visa.if I was to do it all again I'd of booked my wedding ceremony for later next year and just had a courthouses wedding for when I arrived

[SparklePony 238]

Don't forget that the sooner you have your marriage license, the sooner you can start AOS and all that, so that's another advantage of having a courthouse wedding very soon after arrival.