(Humor) Dr. Epstein

[TBoneTX 45,568]

DR. EPSTEIN

Dr. Epstein was a renowned physician who earned his undergraduate, graduate, and medical degrees in his home town of Baltimore. After graduating from Johns Hopkins Medical School, he practiced in Manhattan and quickly rose to the top of his field.

Soon, he was invited to deliver a significant paper at a prestigious medical conference, coincidentally held in his hometown of Baltimore. He walked on stage and placed his papers on the lectern. As he acknowledged the applause, the papers slid off onto the floor. When the doctor bent over to retrieve them, he farted like a bull elephant.

The microphone amplified his eruption and it blasted through the auditorium and reverberated through the halls! He was totally mortified, but somehow regained just enough composure to deliver his paper. Finished, he ignored the standing applause and raced out a back door, hoping never to be seen in his hometown again.

Decades later, his elderly mother was terminally ill, and he was compelled to returned to Baltimore to visit her. Still smarting from the old embarrassment, he arrived under cover of darkness and reserved a hotel room under the name of "Brown."

The desk clerk asked, "Is this your first visit to our city, Mr. Brown?"

"Well, actually," the doctor replied. "It isn't. I grew up here and got my education here, but then I moved away."

"You haven't you been back?" asked the desk clerk.

"Well," he reflected, "I did visit once, many years ago, but a very embarrassing thing happened, and since then I've just been too ashamed to return."

"Mr. Brown," the clerk consoled him, "I don't have your life experience, but one thing I have learned is that often what seems embarrassing to me isn't even remembered by others. I'll bet that's true of your incident, too."

"Perhaps," Dr. Epstein sighed, "but it was pretty awful."
"So, this was a long time ago?"
"Yes, many decades."
"Really?" the clerk said. "Was it before or after the Epstein Fart?"