Would you feel the same if your SO's religious beliefs changed?

[Karen_L 1]

If my husband became extremely religious it would probably put me off a bit. Depending on how his personality changed, it might even cause me to reconsider if this is the mans for me. If he started demanding that I adopt his newfound beliefs, that'd be totally uncool.

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

could spell the end, very.

bullsh!t

Why do you think that's bullsh1t?

[featherB 1]

We're both very much not religious, and I really can't imagine that I'd have ever got involved with someone even remotely religious in the first place. For him to become religious in any way, would basically involve him becoming an entirely different person - thinking differently, believing totally different things (obviously), and... pretty much having a complete personality change. It would change who he is. So, yeah - as he'd have to become a totally different person from the one I fell in love with, and as that 'new' person sounds very much like someone I can't imagine I'd have gone for in the first place... best case scenario, I would feel very, very weird and uncomfortable with it, worst case scenario, it would cause major problems.

Lucky it's not ever going to happen, then!

[KarenCee 3]

To be honest, our relationship isn't built around a religious belief or non-belief. At the moment, we feel the same way about our beliefs. If one of us were to change, I seriously don't believe it would cause a rift, or a separation of love.

[LaL 418]

i think it would be fine should he feel the need to reaquaint himself with religion non-fanatically, but imposing it on me even in the slightest- no way - he knows that wouldn't fly in the least.

[Sinergy 3]

Hes baptist, and im just in limbo, i believe in alot of things neither of us care as long as religion doesnt become an argument.

[Nessa 23]

Yes I'd feel the same. I don't see a grown up man changing his beliefs out of nowhere and even if he did I would support his decision.

[chri'stina 190]

I think it would cause problems in our marriage if one of us suddenly changed to another religion. I don't think it would be the end of us, but it'd be very very hard.

It's very important in our relationship. So if we weren't there to support each other anymore in our faith, which is the most important thing to both of us, we'd be very sad.

[Mags 112]

I think it depends on the religion as well. Some are more radical or devout than others. Some religions demand more in return than others. Some demand money and huge amounts of time. Others can be just a personal thing you do by yourself.

If Larry became a Baptist, who went to church many times a week, who preached to me to become Christian and gave huge swathes of our cash to the local church...then yes, I'd pretty much make my views known to him. I wouldn't be happy and that is no basis for an ongoing relationship.

If he became a private religious follower. I.E. if he decided to believe in a God/Goddess and worshipped in his own time and/or it involved only a 20 minute prayer/ritual each morning then I could cope with it.

If he started trying to convert me...well, I wouldn't think so much of him. I make my own decisions about life. People telling me what to believe in doesn't go down well and that would start to eat away at the relationship.

[Wild Wind 0]

Yes I'd feel the same. I don't see a grown up man changing his beliefs out of nowhere and even if he did I would support his decision.

More and more people today I believe are changing their beliefs. If you look how many grown men/women are giving up their conventional Christian beliefs and becoming atheist or non-believers. I never fit into this mold of Christian religious beliefs due to what I felt. I wouldn’t elaborate on this, but I found a belief I am totally comfortable in. It is never to late no matter how old or grown up you are to make changes in your life may it be religion, yoga, exercising, stop smoking or drinking, etc. why are so many older people returning to college, maybe they don’t want to be a follower and want to learn and make their own life decisions. I do admire you that you would support his decision.

[JenT 0]

For better or worse, but that could be the 'worst'... we both have strong faith and balance each other in that regard.

Jen

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

I think it depends on the religion as well.

Yes. I am not very religious myself but within the confines of my home, there are certain religions I will tolerate and many I will not.

[~Jess~ 0]

[ace13 0]

For better or worse, but that could be the 'worst'... we both have strong faith and balance each other in that regard.

Jen

You took the words right out of my mouth. I would be really concerned that there were deeper problems or issues if he or I changed that dramatically. Plus, I am a firm believer that parents need to approach parenthood as a united front and if we were not on the same page spiritually, it would be really hard to raise children that were not confused and lost.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Curious.

Hey Alex,

I would like to clarify the difference between understanding Truth and how it is experienced, celebrated or expressed. For example, if my SO fervently believed in an ever-loving God - that Truth is not confined to one specific religion.

The reason I think that it's important distinction is that, IMO, part of the growth process of a lifetime commitment is spiritual. I think that all loving relationships have a spiritual aspect of them, so what you and your SO understand as Truth is significant to the relationship. I don't think, however, that it necessarily means the two of you must experience, celebrate or express that Truth in the same way.