The SteveAndTiff Dultimatum

[Darnell 8,479]

my good deed for the day.

on my walk about , i heard and smelled leaking gas. found it, called it in to the fire department, waited till they arrived and showed them the spot.

seems a valve for an illegal gas tapped was sheared off.

[SAT 9,609]

I just called the Dane and told him I wanted Ikea.

They've got some seafood at Ikea gogo?

Ikea horse meat crab cakes yum yum...

my good deed for the day.

on my walk about , i heard and smelled leaking gas. found it, called it in to the fire department, waited till they arrived and showed them the spot.

seems a valve for an illegal gas tapped was sheared off.

You shoulda told the nearest hot chick that you saved her life

[Darnell 8,479]

You shoulda told the nearest hot chick that you saved her life

Huh? I'm a serial monogamist, currently married. Why to suggest I do this, in the hopes I'd be knocking boots locally? Come on Steve, that doesn't wash with me.

[SAT 9,609]

Huh? I'm a serial monogamist, currently married. Why to suggest I do this, in the hopes I'd be knocking boots locally? Come on Steve, that doesn't wash with me.

Ok ok.....sheesh.....no sense of humor.......

I'm back from entertaining tiff in sheepshead bay in Brooklyn......I know why she wanted to go to a fancy dinner now, it's because Gump took her sis to manhattan......eventually having to call me to find a Korean restaurant......

[TBoneTX 45,835]

I'll have to caucus with Mrs. T-B. about whether "suca" is a Swedish blonde or simply a blonde. In her hometown, there's only one blonde, and she's fake with it (albeit long-term), so I think that she qualifies all-in-one as either a rubia or a suca, si man.

Mrs. T-B. has been consulted and has again become irritated upon being queried about Ecu linguistics. She says, "It depends on what part of the country you're from. Suca is used from Cuenca north. It means 'someone who's white.' They don't know the word in Guayaquil. Everyone knows what you mean when you say rubia. If they don't, you say pelo rubio and they'll know exactly. Now leave me alone while I'm trying to look pretty!"

Edited October 19, 2013 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,835]

Company man !

Then gimme my company benefits, man. Start with a hunnerd fiddy.

[TBoneTX 45,835]

I'm the puter guru around here, which also makes me the guy that is supposed to slap people's hands when they misbehave. No one else even knows where to find the logs, let alone how to read them. Makes it nice for my own misbehaving on the internet, but a pain in the butt to when the users here don't act like adults.

Well, what if there's a whole IT department, and some VP who for some reason focuses on "consuming organizational resources," and individual log-in newly required for Internet use? This is hypothetical.

Edited October 19, 2013 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,835]

Anyone want a free dog? He sheds a lot and attacks the vacuum cleaner.

Is he hot, by chance? I'm hungry, see man.

[TBoneTX 45,835]

TB, I don't think they necessarily have to be Swedish to be sucas, that was just the example he gave me. I guess dirty blonde could be just rubias, but white blonde would be suca. or that's what I understood from it, anyways. Let me know what your wife says! I'm always interested in learning about those little differences.

And, in adding to my earlier "enlightenment" from Mrs. T-B., she has also told me that the local Mexicans refer to lighter people/gringos as bolillo ("white bread"). It's not pejorative; merely descriptive in an in-house way. Fascinating, si man.

Edited October 19, 2013 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,835]

I'm going to go stock up on those today.

The dollar stores typically have these. Don't overpay el$ewhere, no man.

[TBoneTX 45,835]

I know what onomatopoeia means, oj tak.

And still a word "Yakutsk" doesn't sound like sneezing to me. That's why I said that I have to improve my English (since I thing I pronounce it wrongly)... Do I make myself clear now?

Oj tak, si man. There's a city in Michigan or Mississippi or somewhere called "Yazoo City" or something. That is as onomatopoeiatic (?) as is Yakutsk. "Ah... ah... ahh... ya-KUTSK! ya-ZOO!" Gesundheit, sneeze man.

[TBoneTX 45,835]

Rabbit season.....

I opened our refrigerator door and was astonished to see a live rabbit inside.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?" asked the rabbit.

"Si, man," I replied.

"Well, I'm just westing."

[TBoneTX 45,835]

Tiff just called......she wants a seafood dinner.

Youse can gives her one if she wanna sleeps wit' da fishes, y' hear whut I'm sayin'? The McFish $ound$ good, $i man.

Edited October 19, 2013 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,835]

Well, Friday morn's o'dark-thirty sojourn was a roaring success. I arose at the first blat of the alarm, managed to leave the house in timely fashion without awakening anybody except the cat (who wondered what Cat-Daddy was up to at such an hour), and got to the garage sale at 6:40, ample time before official opening at 7.

Some lady had already bought half of what the seller was selling. Holy early-bird mackerel. However, I inquired about the pool umbrella and was taken to see it. I asked "How much were you thinking for it?" and the lady said, "$25." I offered $20 and got it, plus help carting the thing to the T-B.-mobile.

I also got a 10" Emeril saucepan (new or almost never used) for $2, and a new-in-box travel steamer (de-wrinkler for clothes) for $1, oj tak.

Got home and neither Mrs. T-B. nor Mini-B. were yet awake. When Mrs. T-B. awoke, she was so excited that she nearly carried the umbrella & base to our patio herself.

After that, there was enough daylight and enough time before work so that I could mow the front lawn, oj tak. This was good, because it had been 2+ weeks and it rained later in the day and is cloudbursting now, rain man.

The best news is that the rain is supposed to end before daybreak, meaning that various community-scale garage sales had better look out for me in a few hours, whee man.

Mrs. T-B. was exhausted and went to bed early, so she doesn't know my intentions yet, no man. If she asks where I'm going, I'll tell her "to see the [harem of 6 imaginary blondes] rubias, si man," oj tak.

Edited October 19, 2013 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,835]

In fact, given the teeming population of witty conversationalists here at this hour, I shall cat-minister and prep for and go to bed myself, zzz man.