Complicated Relationship and I want a Summary Dissolution

[Isabel_Sparkle 0]

Just call me Isabel, I currently living in the Philippines First of all this topic is gonna be long because I want to share my story so you will understand and will not judge me at the end of the situation I have right now.

I am turning 22 next year, I met my american husband in the past 3 years physically but we've known each other for about 2 years but in that two years I am just working on him online, he is much older than me he's 57 years old but actually you may say it's not real but we've been in-love in the past 3 years, he's attitude is somewhat like a Filipino, to make it short he is very kind and very loving, before we got married he opened up he had a terrible divorce with his ex-wife, but with no doubts we got married on january 25, 2012, he always come here in the Philippines like 6 times a year! our communication was superb. I got my visa december 2012 and spend my New year in US with his friends, he was once a very very wealthy man but when we meet he suffered in insolvency so nothing left but thats not a problem because what important to me is moving on and start a family and live happily, we've been very very sweet and passionate, holding hands while walking show off the love, even people will judge us, though he is very guilty on what is happening(his problems) I still support him, it seems like the whole world hate him, I just don't know why, he such a good person, even his family and friends hated him., but as a wife I never gave up. He suffered from a 5 years terrible divorce, Chapter 11 and currently Chapter 7(Bankruptcy) all the properties was taken, we live in an apartment and we also support my family here in the Philippines, it was a total shutdown for us, but it's not a reason to give up, I am 21 and considered attractive woman, many would go and court me but I franky say I am married and no interest, thata how loyal and honest I am, to all his downs I've been there uplift and support him. I find a job that will help us recover, I work two jobs just to make us faster to recover and also supports him always and take care of him even though I am tired, also worried because he has diabetes I manage to cost-cutting and budgeting, very much! Fortunately after 5 months of working on we are slowly recovering and I quit my second job so we can spend time more together. I do not know why FBI always visiting us, I guess it's because of the bankruptcy, in all the truth, its my husband's words I only trust and I dont listen to anybody there, thats how dedicated and very committed wife I am to him, as of our excitement I've been to a doctor so we can have a baby, and we plan also to marry in church this year, since we are only civil marriage in Philippines,we have many plans, we are happy when suddenly 7am morning when I woke up my husband was in a handcuffed by 5 i mean 5 big FBI agents, I was just in total massive shock, waking up in the morning and thats it, it takes me few hours to react. I was overflowingly crying and crying and crying, he was suspect for bank fraud, mortgage fraud, tax fraud, wire fraud and more fraud.

I just don't know what to say, I really dont know anything like this! for all the years I have been supportive to him and this? I was just a new resident in california and for my own good, I went home in Philippines, because I got sick with stress no ones gonna help me, only left me 1,500 plus my salary of 800 and on my bank 1500 not bad at least i can go home, with a little cash. Now his in prison for months now, and I can't do it no more, with all the threat and very messy life and people keep running after him and secrecy about him with all the hidden money accusation, I really do not know what to do, even if there is no money or not if it is messy as like this its not worth it, I sent him a letter that i cannot make it anymore, I'm 21 and facing problems like this? I know I shall support him because he's in prison no friends, no one is there for him, and yes it's a matter of adjustment, but I am really tired of this dealing with his endless unknown problems, I told him not to lie to me, open up everything but he mess with it,

My decision is fix I want a SUMMARY DISSOLUTION - DIVORCE, he must be the one to file it, yes he will, I am only in the Philippines? and his in prison? What shall I do? I want to move on with life and start a new beggining, yes we meet the requirements of summary disoltion, no property, no debt, no kids nothing we've been married almost 2 years still. I do not know how to deal with our situation, and what shall I do to make our divorce recognize here in the Philippines so I can remarry and reclaim my life. Please help!

[Pitaya 2,577]

~Moved from Introducing our Members to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits~

~Immigration/marriage/bankruptcy/imprisonment/seek divorce….many issues...

Edited October 4, 2013 by A&B

[Boggy1974 124]

Wow! Sorry I don't know much about PI divorce process. Hope a member will stop by to provide the needed advice.

Have you posted this in the Philippine forum? Alternatively, a mod can move it there.

Best of luck moving forward.

[Scot_Roselyn 7]

My dear. Hire a lawyer in you state of residence there in USA then allow the lawyer to file for you. If starting over is your wish, then this is the best way in myopinion. I wish you the very best in your situation and keep your head up. You are not the first to see this happen. Easy process really. God bless you

Scot

[Isabel_Sparkle 0]

I cannot file because if I will, it will not be recognize in the Philippines, It's under Philippine law, we don't divorce exemptions are only if the foreign spouse filed it.So I have to wait that he will file it, I got a news that he will be release, even so my decision is fix, I don't wanna live like this, 4 years is I think enough to know him better but his full of secrecy.. I hope someone can help me.

[bigdog 376]

Good Luck getting this resolved.

[HollyGolightly 72]

My decision is fix I want a SUMMARY DISSOLUTION - DIVORCE, he must be the one to file it, yes he will, I am only in the Philippines? and his in prison? What shall I do? I want to move on with life and start a new beggining, yes we meet the requirements of summary disoltion, no property, no debt, no kids nothing we've been married almost 2 years still. I do not know how to deal with our situation, and what shall I do to make our divorce recognize here in the Philippines so I can remarry and reclaim my life. Please help!

I am just curious to ask if the marriage was recorded in the Civil Registry record in the Philippines. If not then problem solved. If it is then too bad, you'd have to get either annulled in the Philippines or get Divorced in the US. You are right, he (USC) should file the divorce and the decree issued in the US is binding upon you (Filipina) in the Philippines. No absolute divorce in the Philippines, except thru Sharia law, so unless you are of the muslim faith (which I doubt you are) good luck filing for divorce yourself. You have an option though to file for declaration of nullity of marriage in the Philippines. Easier than annulment but still a lengthy process, or you can wait 7 years and file for a declaration of presumptive death. That will have the effect of dissolving the marriage ties provided he does not appear to oppose it and with him in jail, your claim will likely be granted.

[Kajikit 65]

Sounds like even the Phillipines should give you an annullment - you unknowingly married a criminal and he had an entire life you knew nothing about. Sounds like deception and fraud to me...

[Shiobhan 235]

Sorry about your demise even-though we getting one side of

the story I truly hope things work out for you...Have you visited

him in the jail to say to him fess-up or I have to move on , request

he files a divorce because that's how it works in your country.

One is innocent until proven guilty and he may very well be guilty

the feds do thorough work, however did your undy-ing love jump

through the window, you spent some happy times with him and

his cash when life was good, you said you worked online on him?

don't know if you wrote that out of context, and finally you are ready

for a divorce to move on to the next person.

I am not saying you should stick it out with a criminal, I am just saying

was the marriage bonafide, because if the feds come and arrest my

husband that I LOVE I am going to get to the bottom of what he did,

so when I say bye I have a clear conscience doing so.

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

My dear. Hire a lawyer in you state of residence there in USA then allow the lawyer to file for you. If starting over is your wish, then this is the best way in myopinion. I wish you the very best in your situation and keep your head up. You are not the first to see this happen. Easy process really. God bless you

Scot

She's not in the USA Scott, and even if she is Attorneys cost money which she already stated that she doesn't have.

I supposed that this is one CON of my firm opinion that K1 visas should be cancelled in it's entirety.

[InHisTime 110]

She's not in the USA Scott, and even if she is Attorneys cost money which she already stated that she doesn't have.

I supposed that this is one CON of my firm opinion that K1 visas should be cancelled in it's entirety.

Hi Gowon, this poster came to the US through spousal visa, not K-1. For me, the existing types of visa are Ok. Not all beneficiaries of K1 have encountered problems when they get to the US.

It is a matter of knowing each other well before commitment. And, if still K-1 beneficiaries would like to take the risks despite of prior red flags, I strongly suggest that they should bring enough cash money to save them on worst-case-scenarios. It makes a lot of difference when beneficiaries are not so dependent with the petitioners, especially in terms of money. They can buy their own air tickes and easily come home if they want to. This is a MUST. Not a bad idea, after all.

Change is inevitable. We have seen couples (weather they met thru online or offline) who have known each other for so long and already have grown up children, but still they get problems and resort to divorce. That is why I believe that couples should allow God to be the center of their relationships, thus making it endless. It takes lot of working out -- continuously. There will be challenges in relationships, but somehow if both partners are christ-like, they will become more patient, understanding, loving, kind, compassionate, giving and forgiving. Not dwelling on the past and mistakes of everyone. Thus, stronger and lasting relationships. Without all these traits, they might not survive as the years ahead. In every action, there is always an opposite reaction.

To the OP, I hope you find ways / solutions to your annulment or divorce. There must be a way to do it. Check with other Filipino experiences on similar cases, if there are. If your story is true, then you should never get back to this very mysterious man. Deceit / Fraud is not good. It is not wise to live a life with full of misery and fears, not good for your health, and no stability. Pray for God's guidance and wisdom, be strong and know that you will never lose hope in God. Have more faith. Have a blessed New Year 2014.

Edited December 31, 2013 by InHisTime

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

Hi Gowon, this poster came to the US through spousal visa, not K-1. For me, the existing types of visa are Ok. Not all beneficiaries of K1 have encountered problems when they get to the US.

It is a matter of knowing each other well before commitment. And, if still K-1 beneficiaries would like to take the risks despite of prior red flags, I strongly suggest that they should bring enough cash money to save them on worst-case-scenarios. It makes a lot of difference when beneficiaries are not so dependent with the petitioners, especially in terms of money. They can buy their own air tickes and easily come home if they want to. This is a MUST. Not a bad idea, after all.

Change in inevitable. We have seen couples (weather they met thru online or offline) who have known each other for so long and already have grown up children, but still they get problems and resort to divorce. That is why I believe that couples should allow God to be the center of their relationships, thus making it endless. It take lots of working out -- continuously. There will be challenges in relationships, but somehow if both couple are christ-like, they will become more patient, understanding, loving, kind, compassionate, giving and forgiving. Thus, stronger and lasting relationships. Without all these traits, they might not survive as the years ahead.

To the OP, I hope you find ways / solutions to your annulment / divorce. There must be a way to do it. Check with other Filipino experiences on similar cases, if there are. If your story is true, then you should never get back to this very mysterious man. It is not wise to live a life with full of misery and fears, not good for your health, and no stability. Pray for God's guidance and wisdom, be strong and know that you will never lose hope in God. Have more faith. Have a blessed New Year 2014.

Yes I know she came with CR1.

In my ploy I assumed that CR1 covered all the angles but now I see that the Philippines is unique in that even with a CR1 shes still at the mercy of the USC.

I really do not want to see any beneficiary at the mercy of the USC. We can make changes even though it doesn't affect all. ObamaCare is a great example.

Good luck to the OP and I hope that she can resolve this quickly and move on with her life and others in the future can read this and choose the appropriate visa category for them.

[InHisTime 110]

Yes I know she came with CR1.

In my ploy I assumed that CR1 covered all the angles but now I see that the Philippines is unique in that even with a CR1 shes still at the mercy of the USC.

I really do not want to see any beneficiary at the mercy of the USC. We can make changes even though it doesn't affect all. ObamaCare is a great example.

Good luck to the OP and I hope that she can resolve this quickly and move on with her life and others in the future can read this and choose the appropriate visa category for them.

Yeah, Gowon, I do understand your perspective on this. Thank you for your great concern to the beneficiaries especially to those who are sincere and who came to America because of Love. May your tribe increase.

Nevertheless, that is how the system works. Maybe it is not meant to be. Give thanks to God in all circumtances. God knows best and still in control. We just need to learn our lessons and be happy still. Thanks and happy new year !

[Jawaree 718]

OP will be just fine, she hopped on back home

ready for a divorce, so by 22 she can move on.

I agree these K1 should end, so many scammers,

and so many abusers to the innocent legit ones

[Caryh 5,206]

For Gowon, any visa problem is a reason to get rid of the K-1, doesn't matter if its a K-1 visa or not. To him they're the root of all evil.

The op hasn't been here since Oct 16th. But your process is, he must file for divorce in the USA. Once the divorce is final, you'll need the divorce papers and file to have the courts recognise that divorce. This is not a simple process, you'll need a lawyer who can provide the relevant laws of the state where the divorce was given, and the court must review that the divorce was properly given by the laws of the location it was given. Once that ruling is completed, the ruling will need to be submitted to the NSO, so they can annotate your CEMAR, to show the marriage was legally and rightly terminated. This is a process just slightly less difficult and complex (which means money) than an annulment.

Hi Gowon, this poster came to the US through spousal visa, not K-1. For me, the existing types of visa are Ok. Not all beneficiaries of K1 have encountered problems when they get to the US.

It is a matter of knowing each other well before commitment. And, if still K-1 beneficiaries would like to take the risks despite of prior red flags, I strongly suggest that they should bring enough cash money to save them on worst-case-scenarios. It makes a lot of difference when beneficiaries are not so dependent with the petitioners, especially in terms of money. They can buy their own air tickes and easily come home if they want to. This is a MUST. Not a bad idea, after all.

Change is inevitable. We have seen couples (weather they met thru online or offline) who have known each other for so long and already have grown up children, but still they get problems and resort to divorce. That is why I believe that couples should allow God to be the center of their relationships, thus making it endless. It takes lot of working out -- continuously. There will be challenges in relationships, but somehow if both partners are christ-like, they will become more patient, understanding, loving, kind, compassionate, giving and forgiving. Not dwelling on the past and mistakes of everyone. Thus, stronger and lasting relationships. Without all these traits, they might not survive as the years ahead. In every action, there is always an opposite reaction.

To the OP, I hope you find ways / solutions to your annulment or divorce. There must be a way to do it. Check with other Filipino experiences on similar cases, if there are. If your story is true, then you should never get back to this very mysterious man. Deceit / Fraud is not good. It is not wise to live a life with full of misery and fears, not good for your health, and no stability. Pray for God's guidance and wisdom, be strong and know that you will never lose hope in God. Have more faith. Have a blessed New Year 2014.

OP will be just fine, she hopped on back home

ready for a divorce, so by 22 she can move on.

I agree these K1 should end, so many scammers,

and so many abusers to the innocent legit ones

She came on a CR-1. Guess that means CR-1's should be ended because of scammers.