What do you wish you knew in the beginning?

[NickD 203]

I echo your thoughts. I wish that we had married last summer when my now wife, then girlfriend, visited on her B2 visa. When she entered we had no intent to marry, but we became engaged towards the end of that visit. Like you, I spoke to an attorney (although it was a free initial consultation) and was spooked by the advice of the attorney not get married while she was here on the visitor's visa. So I went to Bulgaria in December and we got married there. I returned to the US after two months and filed for CR1 while she remained in Bulgaria. Interview is set for 10/3 in Sofia....but we could have been together all of this time !!!! Sure, it might have cost a little more.....but being together for the last 8 months would have been priceless !

My attorney advised since my girls already had B1/B2 visas, didn't have to fool with a K1, but watch that I-94 date, even send us I-94 extension forms. Said get married here, preferably by a federal judge, we did at the next county, was so honored he asked us, wouldn't take a cent, not even for his charities. Even a space on that I-485 that asked if you are living in the USA, her address was exactly the same as mine.

Also advised we send in an extra 600 bucks for the two EAD cards we needed, because the USCIS is extremely slow, we did that. During our AOS interview, said he would be on standby with is phone number, if the IO had any questions, to call him, but when she saw his name on our forms, didn't have any. Wife and stepdaughter plus I was there, wife brought in a photo album of our reception, IO enjoyed looking at those. We were married for over a year, but once we received the NOA's no more concerns about that I-94.

The only bad news we received was since we were not married for two years yet, and she gave us a very strong caution on this, would be to fill out that I-751 90 days before their second green card anniversary. Wrote that down and even pasted the date on our refrigerator door. Download the form and the N-400 as well. See they wanted a ton of evidence and keeping track of trips, so was doing that on a daily basis.

ROC was the worse stage for us, one was trying to explain that crazy one year extension notice, and Emilio was sending these applications all over the place. We did have to make an infopass appointment for that I-551 stamp. I finally called my attorney on this issue, he said, I can't do anything, call your senator. Did that, and a day later the USCIS found our application. Wife only had her ten year card for a week before her citizen interview, but had to give it back. Ha, after all that trouble, she didn't want to give it back.

We had Senator Feingold back then, he headed the USCIS budgeting committee, that sure helped.

[nolanbb 1]

I think most of these immigration cases don't need lawyers, and this site helps greatly with the process. It's like doing your taxes. Some feel more comfortable paying someone else do their taxes, especially those that are more complicated. But with research you are usually able to do them yourself. You will need to gather all the information needed anyway, so a lawyer just helps to tell you what is needed. This site also does a good job of that, so I didn't need a lawyer.

The hardest part of the process to me was not knowing how long of a wait was needed after each phase. Based on information from this site and the USCIS site, after submission of the first set of forms I was expecting a wait of about 5 months before I'd hear from the USCIS about the approval of the application. That ended up actually being about 7 months. Each wait time is usually more time than you would expect, so it can be worrisome. Be patient and you should be okay, but always call the USCIS or NVC if you need reassurance that there's nothing wrong with your application.

[NickD 203]

60% of Americans pay to have their taxes and with over 1,000 different IRS forms and 13,000 pages of tax laws, its no wonder why. But the filing charges are free and if you do make a small error, like 50 bucks, either pay that or get that money back, and maybe with a 1.5% monthly interest fee if you file late. With a business, the accounting fee would be huge paying a CPA, so those I do myself.

With just the I-485, not one but two of them in my case, the filing fee was $$2,140.00, one tiny error, would be rejected and you would lose that fee. Plus all the fees for the many other forms that have to be submitted with it. And where do you start? In answering some quick questions to our attorney, cut that very long list down to just what we needed. We filled out the forms and was responsible for correct spelling of names and Spanish addresses that are about a foot lone.

But some of the questions were so ambiguous couldn't make heads or tails of them with even minor in English. Thanks to Emilio, a Cuban refugee that can't even speak English. I did find the old INS forms, those I could comprehend, That is where our attorney earned his small paycheck.

Worse form for us was that I-693, finding an USCIS approved doctor that wouldn't rob us to death, our health insurance company doesn't pay for this, although the filing cost was free. We also had a deadline to fill out these forms. By getting on the phone, we saved $8,800.00 by finding a reasonable doctor, but had to drive 300 miles to see him. And darn near got an instant appointment. I already typed out the top of that form and made several copies, the rest of it was hand scratching, never did teach doctors how to write. Everything was done correctly and our forms were approved, two weeks later, received the NOA's that canceled out our deadline.

We did the I-751 and the N-400 ourselves, first thing I noticed, was the same old questions we already answered in the AOS stage. Since I already had those forms on my computer, was mostly a copy and paste operation. In first looking at that I-751, even wondered what that was all about, has more loopholes than the IRS. Did have some questions on the N-400 for my attorney, Should we list subversive organizations like the United Way in that section we contributed to? He said, you better.

Since I scanned all of our evidence for the AOS and the ROC with the N-400, the vast majority of it was already on my computer,just had to print it out. My divorce papers are 51 pages long and double sided. Also did a double print for exact copies of what we sent in. USCIS is well known to "misplace" application, and sure would hate to start from scratch. They did misplace the I-130 form for my stepdaughter, had a copy with me that saved a long delay, but even at that, her conditional green card was dated 45 days after my wife's.

It's no wonder my wife commented to me that she saw her file at her citizenship interview, was over 3 1/2 inches thick! 70% of that is redundant. Love reading that paper reduction act in the instructions. And wondered for citizenship, how was her green card issued in the first place? Same old evidence was required as to how she got it in the first place.

Do have the citizenship papers for my grandfather when he first came here, one sheet at Ellis Island. Things sure have become complicated since then.

[kafine 0]

I wish I had known how bloody long it would take just for them to approve my partner's petition.

We were aware it would be a few months, but we are the best part of a year down the road now, and I am just completing my forms. Who knows how much longer it will be before I can actually get married? When we submitted the petition we thought we'd be married in 2013. I have been, for the first time since we got together, longer than 3 months apart from him (it was 8, before he was able to visit me).

I feel terrible for my parents too because if someone had told me "expect to spend a year sitting on your #######" I'd have planned to get a day job of some kind to keep me occupied and supplement my meagre earnings as an artist. It was not something I expected to have time to commit to. I did not expect to have to rely on my parents all this time. So I'm poor, bored, and guilty

[kafine 0]

I agree. I wouldn't take everything said here as fact either. Some of the users just repeat what they have read on here and that becomes a "self referencing fact", which isn't a good thing. Also users have their own biases here too and give advice according to their biases rather than what actually is legal.

The guides are great ...as guides. But you need to read up about the paperwork on the actual USCIS site too, to cater to your specific situation. Start with USCIS guides and then look into the guides here.

Some family based lawyers actually give first one hour free consultation. It gives you a general idea about what forms need to be filled and what you really need in terms of paperwork. I did that before I came on here and I do think that lawyer saved me from getting some RFEs.

Oh god yes; coming on this site has actually made the process harder for me because there was;

- references to a packet of forms I was supposed to expect, which I foolishly waited for!

- references to requiring proof of income etc that are not indicated on either my instructions, not the official website

- horror stories that have sent my stress level to near breaking point

[NickD 203]

We had a major wait as well, but cannot blame the USCIS for this. Was for getting my wife's ex permission to bring his daughter here. He already left the country seven years prior, we had to track him down. They trying to blackmail us to sign those papers. But we were able to counter that with a total of 14 years of child support payments.

Then dealing with those crooked judges and notaries in Venezuela, but they all had Miami bank accounts to prevent an over two year delay. Ha, with the USCIS, after going through all this, their major concern was fraud. Wife just couldn't dump her only daughter on the street, and I would have lost respect for her if she did. But it all worked out.

A US attorney is no good with issues like this, but you have to have that permission for the USCIS, not only that, but needed that before a child can even leave their home country. And didn't make any difference if you have full custody or not.

And so much about that Statue of Liberty thing about bringing your poor here, want your rich only. And on top of this, none of this is tax deductible. If in the 20% tax bracket, the IRS is effecting given you an additional surcharge on all these expenses. You really have to be in love to go through all this, but then constantly guilty of fraud. Already guilty of it, have to prove you are innocent.

[NikLR 13,227]

I wish I had known how bloody long it would take just for them to approve my partner's petition.

We were aware it would be a few months, but we are the best part of a year down the road now, and I am just completing my forms. Who knows how much longer it will be before I can actually get married? When we submitted the petition we thought we'd be married in 2013. I have been, for the first time since we got together, longer than 3 months apart from him (it was 8, before he was able to visit me).

I feel terrible for my parents too because if someone had told me "expect to spend a year sitting on your #######" I'd have planned to get a day job of some kind to keep me occupied and supplement my meagre earnings as an artist. It was not something I expected to have time to commit to. I did not expect to have to rely on my parents all this time. So I'm poor, bored, and guilty

I'll be honest, I was the opposite. I expected the petition to take a year in itself and the NVC stage to take 4-5 months and then another 3 months on top of that waiting for an interview. From research I did on here that was the longish time frame. My 8 months, IMHO was fast and enjoyably so because of the long time I had prepared myself to wait. In fact quitting my job earlier than I had expected just made me feel like I'd dumped on them vs being there the year or two I'd planned.

I always tell people expect at least 6 months for the petition but likely 8-10 plus NVC stage plus waiting for an interview. It's so important to keep busy during the whole thing or else you're driving yourself (and likely everyone else) bananas.

[christeen 966]

One think i have heard over and over here from others is... I Wish I had done more research on what needed to be done AFTER he arrived... That is when life really begins... Things Like health insurance, drivers licence, building credit, adjusting, bank accounts, where to get ethnic foods and all these OTHER details... When they arrive, things are already stressful and new, it is good to not be running around tryi g to find out that info after they arrive, arm yourself with info before they get here!