France/America couples

[Brian & Elise 0]

Hi Angilla! I managed to miss your very nice response! Your timeline has given me hope from the outset. 3 months would be just fine by us. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a no RFE, no lost petition, no kinks filing.

We definitely plan to raise our little buckeroo bi-lingual. And, my so-rusty-it-no-longer-works understanding of French is something I need to work on. I can't have mommy and our little one having secrets right beneath my mono-lingual ears.

I don't know what we'll be asking at the consulate. I guess we're planning to explain our situation and ask their advice! I have very managed expectations but will welcome a surprise. Elise is understandably anxious about the timing; hopefully they'll be able to provide some comfort.

[RosaMystica7 0]

Hehe yeah, like me and my mom talking Italian in front of my dad so he can't understand it. Teehee. We're bad.

You should be getting your NOA2 any day now! Read back to find my posts about my fiance's interview and medical, that'll give you some insight on the France side of things - it's so easy! Start gathering your stuff for the France side of it all NOW. Talk to your employer about the letter you need for the I-134. Packet 3 requests the I-864 but they've been taking the I-134 anyway - so prepare both. Have your fiancee get her vaccination record from her doctor. Click on "embassy info" up top, then click on F for France, bring up the France embassy page for info on what's in packet 3. Go to the downloads section and have her fill out all the packet 3 forms so they're ready to send back when she recieves packet 3. Put together everything you need to send her - a copy of the I-129F, evidence of ongoing relationship, blahblahblah and ship it over to her in France. Etc. The time FLIES after NOA2 and he and I ended up doing it all at the last minute, he got my package on a Friday... his interview was that Wednesday. Don't do that lol it really freaked us out!

I see you live in CT. Do you live anywhere by Bridgeport? I'm about 20 minutes from where the Bridgeport ferry docks in Port Jeff.

[Brian & Elise 0]

Yes - there will be no conspiring in a language I don't understand. And of course I'd like to be able to speak French too for so many other reasons.

Thanks again for your tips. I've done most everything you've mentioned and planned on sitting down with Elise this weekend (I'm flying to France for a visit tonight) to go over all the stuff she'll need for the Visa process. Your post a few pages back about the interview was very encouraging. I plan to share that with Elise too.

I'm about 20 minutes from the Bridgeport-Port Jeff. ferry on this side of the sound... I think that makes us some form of neighbors!

Thanks again for all of your advice.

Hehe yeah, like me and my mom talking Italian in front of my dad so he can't understand it. Teehee. We're bad.

You should be getting your NOA2 any day now! Read back to find my posts about my fiance's interview and medical, that'll give you some insight on the France side of things - it's so easy! Start gathering your stuff for the France side of it all NOW. Talk to your employer about the letter you need for the I-134. Packet 3 requests the I-864 but they've been taking the I-134 anyway - so prepare both. Have your fiancee get her vaccination record from her doctor. Click on "embassy info" up top, then click on F for France, bring up the France embassy page for info on what's in packet 3. Go to the downloads section and have her fill out all the packet 3 forms so they're ready to send back when she recieves packet 3. Put together everything you need to send her - a copy of the I-129F, evidence of ongoing relationship, blahblahblah and ship it over to her in France. Etc. The time FLIES after NOA2 and he and I ended up doing it all at the last minute, he got my package on a Friday... his interview was that Wednesday. Don't do that lol it really freaked us out!

I see you live in CT. Do you live anywhere by Bridgeport? I'm about 20 minutes from where the Bridgeport ferry docks in Port Jeff.

[shayrene 0]

The bilingual thing is very important. I want my child to be able to speak to his/her relatives. I really am in desparate need of mastering the French language. When our baby comes in August, my husband will speak to him/her in French and I will speak English. I hope this won't be too confusing. My husband's cousin's children who live here in the US actually were told by the school system to stick to one language because they weren't mastering English. (It is confusing in their household anyway because they speak 3 different languages.)

I am sure we will find the balance.

[RosaMystica7 0]

Brian, I do think that makes us some sort of neighbors. We could have a bi-national get together sometime.

Shayrene, I've heard that being raised on two languages will make them pick up English slower than they would otherwise... but they catch up. And, in my opinion, the gain is worth the delay. Their minds are little sponges at young ages, it's the perfect time to teach them another language. And all the romance languages are so similar - if the child is raised on French it should be nice and easy for him/her to pick up, say, Spanish later in life if they decide they want to! I know I can read French fairly well because it looks just like Italian, speaking is where I have problems because it sounds so different from what I'm used to.

[danyfra 0]

Hey Everyone,

Haven't been here since a couple of months now, didn't see that topic before.

Anyway, I'm the frenchie of the couple, and I am from Lyon. I arrived in the US last October, and get married on Nov.14th in Vegas, at the graceland chapelle, by a french 'priest' !!

that was really unexpected, but pretty cool 'cause he did the ceremony both in english and french so my mom and sister were able to understand everything

We live near Atlantic City in New Jersey.

My wife came to visit in France 2 times before we get married, she loves it (we went to Paris and south of france by Napoleon's road, going through the mountains, that was lovely in spring ).

She's not speaking french, just knows a few words. Not that i didn't try to teach her, but it's taking time and patience...

Well, now i'm waiting for my EAD to get to work and also my AOS. We applied in january (after a lot of problems with the civil surgeon), and i did my biometrics on valentine's day in philadelphia!!

I think that's all for now, just have to wait to get all the papers done and finally really start my life here....

[RosaMystica7 0]

Welcome danyfra! How do you like New Jersey? What was the change from France to USA like for you?

Good news on our part... I GOT AN APARTMENT!! I don't know when we can move in yet, I have to go back tomorrow to fill out some paperwork. We're hoping for no longer than 2 weeks!

[bostonparis 0]

Welcome danyfra! How do you like New Jersey? What was the change from France to USA like for you?

Good news on our part... I GOT AN APARTMENT!! I don't know when we can move in yet, I have to go back tomorrow to fill out some paperwork. We're hoping for no longer than 2 weeks!

Congratulations!!!!!! Tell us about it!

[RosaMystica7 0]

Well... it's a ground-level complex, there's about 8 apartments in the building. When you walk in, to the right is a big living room with a big window and air conditioner. Straight ahead is a kitchen with a cieling fan, stove/oven, marble countertops, lots of cabinet space, a microwave, and a big refrigerator/freezer. There's a back door leading out to the patio and private back yard, where landscapers mow the lawn and snow removal shovels snow off the patio. Back inside the house there's a door, one way goes to the bedroom with another cieling fan and a good closet in it. The other way goes to the bathroom which has a sunroof in it, and I just have to brag, it's the best part of the place! (Just sort of weird to look up from the toilet and see sky! )

It's $875/month and all that includes is hot water. But as far as apartment complexes go, that's awesome, most 1 bedroom apartments in complexes go for over $1,000. I was hoping for more like $850/month INCLUDING utilities but those are all in private houses, like people's basements and stuff, and there's a lot of psychos around here... plus all the ones I've seen in the last two weeks have been dumps. You get what you pay for, basically. It's gonna be really hard to stretch the money, but we'd struggle no matter where we went so... we might as well struggle in a roomy, pretty apartment!

Across the street is a library. Across the street in the other direction is a huge park with lots of walking trails and woods and stuff. I'm gonna bring my bike, and my dad is giving his bike to my fiance. We'll chain them down on our patio. So there will be things for my fiance to do while I'm not home! If he gets the temp EAD... well... there's huge chains of stores and even an office building within walking distance! Basically he'll just walk down the street and see if he can find someone that's hiring. My approved time off from work for our civil marriage is April 4th - 16th and there's no way he'd be able to get that much time off with a new job, so basically we figure he could just get a cruddy local job for a month... quit it... then when I go back to work on April 17th I'll bring his resume and try to get him a job at my place for 2 months, then he could quit it when his temp EAD expires. By the time he gets his next EAD he should have his driver's license, and hopefully we'd be able to afford a second car, so he could be more independant in finding a good steady job.

Oooh, and another cool thing is... 10 minutes in one direction is my job, 10 minutes in the other direction is my parents' house! It's perfect, right in between!

And... across the street, right next to the library, is a Chinese restaurant. There's Greek and Japanese restaurants there too, I never tried either type of food before. There's also a bagel place a little ways down the street. So there's plenty of options for when we burn dinner! Can't really afford it, though, so we'll have to... erm... be careful.

Speaking of burning, a fireman lives in the apartment complex. So if we ever need help it's right next door!

Anyway. I'm going back tomorrow to fill out the paperwork for them to run a credit check on me. As long as the credit check doesn't show anything horrendous, the apartment's mine! We'd like to move my fiance here on Friday, March 23rd. As soon as the apartment is finalized we'll buy the tickets.

:dance:

It's bittersweet, though. I've fought with my parents my whole life, and now that we're not fighting... I don't want to leave. I still have the I don't want to grow up feeling, and while I'm excited I also feel so sad to be getting older and starting another part of my life... and leaving a part of my life that I'll never be able to get back again. My fiance's mom just started drinking, after being sober for months. It's been hard for him to say goodbye to his friends, and his family... especially since he doesn't know when he'll be able to return to France. As much as he hates his life in France he also loves it. We'll be happy once we're together, but the move is going to be rough on us both.

Edited March 11, 2007 by Angilla

[bostonparis 0]

Your apartment looks and sounds great! I can't believe he'll be here in less than 2 weeks!

Fortunately, you will be living so close to your parents. I know it's a hard thing to make that first move out of your parents' house. But once your fiance is here, you'll be so busy setting up your new place, showing him around, etc., that before you know it you'll wonder why you didn't move out years ago!! Chin up as my grandma used to say. You'll be okay.

[RosaMystica7 0]

I'm so upset... The landlord's an a**hole. He used the excuse of needing to see original proof of my fiance being legal. I tried to explain the visa is in his passport and my parents wouldn't let him stay in their house, so we need a place for him to live before he came here on the visa. The idiot didn't even know what a visa is. I ended up hanging up on him because he was getting rude and wouldn't let me finish my sentences and kept demanding originals proving his legality in the US.

My parents are going to let my fiance stay in my room for a month or so til we get on our feet. No more of this "you'll be coming with your fiance?" "no my fiance's in france" "why's he in france?" "he just got a visa to move here" "uhh, oh" conversations. We'll buy the tickets and move him here, and go apartment hunting together.

I knew that apartment was too good for us. I f*cking knew it. Better to see this side of the landlord before we sign a lease rather than later, though. *sigh*

Edited March 11, 2007 by Angilla

[bostonparis 0]

I'm so upset... The landlord's an a**hole. He used the excuse of needing to see original proof of my fiance being legal. I tried to explain the visa is in his passport and my parents wouldn't let him stay in their house, so we need a place for him to live before he came here on the visa. The idiot didn't even know what a visa is. I ended up hanging up on him because he was getting rude and wouldn't let me finish my sentences and kept demanding originals proving his legality in the US.

My parents are going to let my fiance stay in my room for a month or so til we get on our feet. No more of this "you'll be coming with your fiance?" "no my fiance's in france" "why's he in france?" "he just got a visa to move here" "uhh, oh" conversations. We'll buy the tickets and move him here, and go apartment hunting together.

I knew that apartment was too good for us. I f*cking knew it. Better to see this side of the landlord before we sign a lease rather than later, though. *sigh*

I'm so sorry, Angilla. But I am SO happy to hear that your parents finally agreed to let him stay at their house. That is great news. Now you two can find a place together, and not jump into it just because you have to find a place. So does this mean he'll come sooner than March 23??

[RosaMystica7 0]

You know, I hadn't thought about that. Maybe he could come this Friday instead of next Friday. I don't need to set up an apartment anymore. I just need to clean my bedroom. Hmmm. It's going to depend on the price of plane tickets, and what my fiance wants to do. Off I go to look at ticket prices.

[RosaMystica7 0]

Okay, Saint-Clair and I thought about it and he'll be coming home next Friday, the 23rd. Only 4 days isn't enough time for him to wrap everything up and say goodbye to his friends and family... especially his mom that JUST started drinking again, after months of being sober. I personally am afraid that tearing him away from his mom in just 4 short days would plunge his mom further into alcoholism... he'll have the rest of his life with me, but who knows when his mom will be able to see him again. And I mean, closing out his bank account... packaging stuff and mailing it to me... getting his money back from the driving school... giving the final word on his apartment... he gets out of work at 6pm his time this week, there's no time for him to do anything. He's taking off of work this Friday, and he's hoping to get next Wednesday and Thursday off too. (If not, they have to give him his money for his paid days, then.)

When I get home from work today we'll buy his plane tickets.

And we've decided that next weekend will be "me" weekend. Each of our weekends have been as stressful and hellish as our work week. So next weekend we're each doing something for ourselves, and we're going to make our weekends happy and truly relaxing. Although neither of us have a clue what we'll do... LOL.

Edited March 12, 2007 by Angilla

[bostonparis 0]

Okay, Saint-Clair and I thought about it and he'll be coming home next Friday, the 23rd. Only 4 days isn't enough time for him to wrap everything up and say goodbye to his friends and family... especially his mom that JUST started drinking again, after months of being sober. I personally am afraid that tearing him away from his mom in just 4 short days would plunge his mom further into alcoholism... he'll have the rest of his life with me, but who knows when his mom will be able to see him again. And I mean, closing out his bank account... packaging stuff and mailing it to me... getting his money back from the driving school... giving the final word on his apartment... he gets out of work at 6pm his time this week, there's no time for him to do anything. He's taking off of work this Friday, and he's hoping to get next Wednesday and Thursday off too. (If not, they have to give him his money for his paid days, then.)

When I get home from work today we'll buy his plane tickets.

And we've decided that next weekend will be "me" weekend. Each of our weekends have been as stressful and hellish as our work week. So next weekend we're each doing something for ourselves, and we're going to make our weekends happy and truly relaxing. Although neither of us have a clue what we'll do... LOL.

Enjoy your "me" weekend, and good luck with the big move! How exciting!!