Fradulent husband married for a visa

[Merrytooth 5,748]

playing harp to a cow

[SingleDad2usc 71]

Whatever this means, I feel like a sole voice defending someone accused of conspiracy. The victim's parents, who live with the man, don't believe he is a conspirator; but a score of people who drummed conspiracy up out of zero evidence, based strictly on gender and nationality of a person, are all over the story. Yes, OP is a victim (of unfortunately unhappy marriage). I sympathize, I'd been abandoned by a spouse too - but It's life, and we have to take the bumps, and we have to carry the burden of own stupidity. And when it comes to love, I might just do it again...and I again will NOT be blaming her for my love.

OP should certainly have the benefit of the best advice, and I'm not surprised with OP's moving Topic. I am surprised at the ease with which people are ready to brutally jump on a person presumed innocent

[MedRoni 161]

Whatever this means, I feel like a sole voice defending someone accused of conspiracy. The victim's parents, who live with the man, don't believe he is a conspirator; but a score of people who drummed conspiracy up out of zero evidence, based strictly on gender and nationality of a person, are all over the story. Yes, OP is a victim (of unfortunately unhappy marriage). I sympathize, I'd been abandoned by a spouse too - but It's life, and we have to take the bumps, and we have to carry the burden of own stupidity. And when it comes to love, I might just do it again...and I again will NOT be blaming her for my love.

OP should certainly have the benefit of the best advice, and I'm not surprised with OP's moving Topic. I am surprised at the ease with which people are ready to brutally jump on a person presumed innocent

You are a sole voice and for good reason. If she had said she "thinks" he married her for a green card... she "thinks" he wants to bring over another woman, then yes - I would look twice at what was actual fact and what was just perception. But here is a man you call innocent, that has flat out told her what he has done. She had every right to come here and ask for help/advise as most members here are great support, like a community... family if you will. It is also immigration related no matter how you look at it. She also had every right to tell her side. There is nothing on this forum that forces us to read and reply to posts. We should be keeping things positive and helpful and if we cannot on a particular topic we should just move on.

[dyntyne 11]

A person presumed innocent? I quote from the OP: "...he admitted his intent was just to obtain his visa, and divorce me...He wants to divorce me and go back to India and marry a girl he knows and have her come here like he planned for so long."

What facts are you referring to, SingleDad?

Enough. @Merrytooth your post mad me laugh.

[SingleDad2usc 71]

I just explained that I sympathize with OP, and that she is a victim. Not necessarily the victim of what everyone has made of her story. How can a score of outsiders accuse a man of something that her parents (who he lives with) DON'T believe? It would appear, that the people accusing him with no evidence WANT to do that. For what purpose?

[MedRoni 161]

I just explained that I sympathize with OP, and that she is a victim. Not necessarily the victim of what everyone has made of her story. How can a score of outsiders accuse a man of something that her parents (who he lives with) DON'T believe? It would appear, that the people accusing him with no evidence WANT to do that. For what purpose?

Very easily,, because we (in general) are not part of her culture that has a different view about marriage/divorce and "saving face/honor" for both her and her family. No one wants to believe anyone could be so cruel to another.. but reality check.. it happens. And who are we to question her honesty?

Edited July 23, 2013 by MedRoni

[SingleDad2usc 71]

Why not read the rest of the text offered? That there is in fact no evidence, and that her parents, who live with them, don't believe it. Why is it so hard to swallow that he brought up a "third person" as a delicate explanation of wanting out of the relationship. Like no one has heard of such in their life

A person presumed innocent? I quote from the OP: "...he admitted his intent was just to obtain his visa, and divorce me...He wants to divorce me and go back to India and marry a girl he knows and have her come here like he planned for so long."

What facts are you referring to, SingleDad?

Enough. @Merrytooth your post mad me laugh.

[Jawaree 717]

Take time to know him/her...its not an overnite thing

something I tell my kids over & over from now. I also

wish there was a testimony thread on here.

OP really sorry for your falling for a scam, but U will find

a good person one day ...just take your time. Even with

time deceivers will deceive, there R some bonafide couples

that do not work out due to cultural differences, culture

shock, or one just not into the other anymore, however

when someone tells U that's Y he marry U; U should report

everything, file for a divorce, and move on, would have been

nice to tape that conversation with him & turn over to uscis

[SingleDad2usc 71]

For what it's worth, I believe he said it to OP. I also believe, he wouldn't say that if he thought it may be taped. His reason to say that might have been innocent

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

You will find many are so bold as to use another soul to gain immigration benefits. You will find that these people are so full of themselves that they think they can tell you to your face that you where their stepping stone to the US because they think they are safe once they have the green card in hand. So many get away with it partly because other slimy immigrants will rush to aid these people with advise on getting by the system, filing false VAWA , getting benefits they don't deserve. There groups of people are much better at what they are doing than the person being scammed. Unfortunately immigration isn't much help at throwing these people out of the country in a way that would deter the next person that wants to do this. You can report him to ICE and his local embassy. If you have a clue to his password construct , maybe some of his emails to this woman would help.

[SingleDad2usc 71]

Don't interpret defending people's rights (including his) as questioning OP's honesty. Admit that OP has not been perceiving EVERYTHING exactly the same way as people surrounding her, to include her parents and her husband. Even more: OP never mentioned the husband blowing up on anyone, but she did mention herself blowing up on him (on account of wanting to move away from parents.) Again, with all of my sympathy to all OP's efforts in her marriage, we just have nothing bad on this guy...Which parents are trying to tell her...But the husband appears drained...lost interest...which happens to many upon their resettlement to America for varied reasons. It's hard to get into a person's head...and we never heard of love here to begin with. The arrangement didn't work out, and no one should be blamed looking from outside in

Very easily,, because we (in general) are not part of her culture that has a different view about marriage/divorce and "saving face/honor" for both her and her family. No one wants to believe anyone could be so cruel to another.. but reality check.. it happens. And who are we to question her honesty?

[Golden Gate 530]

Don't interpret defending people's rights (including his) as questioning OP's honesty. Admit that OP has not been perceiving EVERYTHING exactly the same way as people surrounding her, to include her parents and her husband. Even more: OP never mentioned the husband blowing up on anyone, but she did mention herself blowing up on him (on account of wanting to move away from parents.) Again, with all of my sympathy to all OP's efforts in her marriage, we just have nothing bad on this guy...Which parents are trying to tell her...But the husband appears drained...lost interest...which happens to many upon their resettlement to America for varied reasons. It's hard to get into a person's head...and we never heard of love here to begin with. The arrangement didn't work out, and no one should be blamed looking from outside in

Not sure why OP should perceive everything the same as her parents or her husband. Obvious to me she married him because she believed they cared about each other. However, she began to feel that he didn't want to be around her except for sex. Not sure what her parents think about the situation matters - they don't have an intimate relationship with her husband, she does. They can perceive whatever they want. She is her own person and she has a right to be angry that her marriage isn't working out.

[SingleDad2usc 71]

She has all rights...So does he. That's exactly why I came to his defense. I'm all for her getting best advice; and I'm also for him not to be thrown under the bridge

[Golden Gate 530]

Well, quite frankly, I don't understand if someone is just unhappy with their marriage, why they can't just say they are unhappy with the marriage, but instead would feel the need to say all kinds of things like I just married you for the green card and I want to marry this girl back home. What would compel a person to make up all that if it is not true? Why complicate the truth and create mind games?

[SingleDad2usc 71]

It would be even more incredulous, if he indeed was a part of an elaborate multi-year conspiracy and spilled the beans for no reason. He is not presented as an emotional or stupid person, and he didn't need anything from OP for further immigration purposes (as more experienced members here assert.)

Why would he offer a pay off? Makes no sense.

I think he just wanted to move on, didn't want the OP to cling, and also offered to pay OP back for all of her expenses. This is more than many sponsoring spouses are offered at break up. There appears nothing wrong with his behavior; and again, the only close to the matter people - her parents - believe likewise.

I stayed away here, I have nothing to gain by defending his rights. But when I saw the wall of people just barge in with presumption of his guilt, and how he must be lynched...This is un-American, and that's why USCIS doesn't act on no evidence

Edited July 23, 2013 by SingleDad2usc