Should i give some advice to my friend?

[Shimura 0]

dear all, today i just got a text from my friend, she said she found out that her husband's ex wife texted him and said she just came back from camping and then he text to his ex wife and said there is no way my friend will do that go to camp or standing listening music for hours, he missed the things that they used to do with his ex wife. and he said his summer kinda boring

So my friend asked me what to do now? should she talk with her husband but she is afraid her husband knows she was check on his phone, but she feel terrible right now as i can says

Actually i don't really want to get involve but she is my friend and i am a woman too, so i know how she feels right now

any suggestion for me?

[NikLR 13,227]

Maybe she should take this opportunity to improve her marriage and step out of her comfort zone. I don't really want to go into how they were both in the wrong and why. But she should look forward and move ahead. Even having a talk with him about how to improve their marriage would be a start.

[Shimura 0]

Maybe she should take this opportunity to improve her marriage and step out of her comfort zone. I don't really want to go into how they were both in the wrong and why. But she should look forward and move ahead. Even having a talk with him about how to improve their marriage would be a start.

that's what i am thinking about too, i don't want to give anything which is can force her to think something different, and maybe i will just says something better just knew it and think something about their marriage life, and think if is it really can be suspicious that her husband still has a feeling or not with his ex wife or he just talk as a friend

[NikLR 13,227]

She could just ask him "hey are you happy? Do you like how we live? Is there anything you wish we could do together?" Conversations like that are called good communication and even without this issue, are good to have. They prevent this issue she's having in the first place.

[Shimura 0]

She could just ask him "hey are you happy? Do you like how we live? Is there anything you wish we could do together?" Conversations like that are called good communication and even without this issue, are good to have. They prevent this issue she's having in the first place.

agreed 100% with you NikiR, she called me this morning and said she asked to her husband same like what you said and her husband said he is never be happier before and i guess my friend asked about the text thing, and her husband said, there is nothing between them,he just talk with her as a friend and my friend told him, if you wanna do hike. camping, you can do that without me and so do i if i want to go to the mall

so i guess they are even, husband doesn't like going around to the mall ( i guess every husband most are like that hahahaaa ) and wife doesn't like to do hike etc but as far as i known, sometimes they are going with their dogs

[Caryh 5,206]

agreed 100% with you NikiR, she called me this morning and said she asked to her husband same like what you said and her husband said he is never be happier before and i guess my friend asked about the text thing, and her husband said, there is nothing between them,he just talk with her as a friend and my friend told him, if you wanna do hike. camping, you can do that without me and so do i if i want to go to the mall

so i guess they are even, husband doesn't like going around to the mall ( i guess every husband most are like that hahahaaa ) and wife doesn't like to do hike etc but as far as i known, sometimes they are going with their dogs

Saying we'll just do what we like separately isn't such a good answer in my opinion. A pattern of living separate entertainment can build into a life totally separate from your future ex spouse. They should be cultivating things they like to do together, and part of that is learning to enjoy doing things your partner enjoys just because you're with them. Now few will meet the standard of doing everything always together, but these are some major things he enjoys that take a bit a time. Camping for a weekend or a week without her, and who's he supposed to be with having this fun? Out at a club listening to music, and who is he going to be chatting up while he's there? Maybe the camping can turn into road trips and hikes staying at a hotel or motel with a little shopping thrown in. Maybe listening to music can be at clubs with music more to her tastes at times to. Most people marry to have a partner to share their lives with. Living going down separate roads just doesn't seem to work in the long run in my point of view. First you're in love, then you're married, then you're more roommates, until finally you have nothing in common with that other person in your house.

[Darnell 8,478]

I suggest that YOU, as the friend,

arrange for a meal with the ex-wife, sit with the ex-wife, and talk, a lot.

Weapons optional, of course.

[NikLR 13,227]

I completely agree with Cary. Compromise, collaboration, and communication is what makes the marriage work. Be best friends. Do thing together. Enjoy your time with each other and appreciate each other for who you are. My husband is my best friend, I cannot think of another person with whom I have so much in common and have so much joy just doing every day things. It's good she talked to him though. That's always the start.

[duraaraa 203]

The fact that your friend was checking her husbands phone means that she's a bit worried for some reason or another -- I think that the relationship can't last unless trust is established.

I've never secretly looked through my wife's phone, and she's never looked through mine.