The SteveAndTiff Identity

[TBoneTX 46,137]

My Aldi is chock full of latino/a illegal aliens.

Both of ours (new one just opened) are populated chiefly by people from [huge continent name] of all varieties, all of whom are pushy and discourteous and seem to view themselves as the only ones in the store.

We need a .GIF response thread or game.

Not in this thread, please.

[TBoneTX 46,137]

In thrilling Sunday news:

Did the other 5 laundry loads (to go with the 3 Saturday). Argued mildly with various females, including the cat (who technically is an "it"). Actually got the Sunday newspaper read. Played with Mini-Bone and his new garage-sale dinosaur. Put up with a visit from Mini-B.'s out-of-control 4-year-old girlfriend (albeit a blonde) who's essentially being raised by her grandma but for whom "discipline" is an alien term. Just polished off quart-sized bottle #4 of "N2 low-calorie grape thirst-quencher" (on the label, illiterately minus the hyphens), bought yesterday at Aldi. Reeling, writhing, and fainting in coils. Si, man. Bedtime and zzz, man.

Edited to add: Before off-logging, idly checked "Today's Top 20 Posters," and I was #1 by a mile today (46 posts to Brother D.'s 33, although many of mine were thread-moves). That's the first & last time that this will certainly ever happen, si man, but perhaps it confirms how slow this Sunday was on VJ, zzz man.

Edited July 29, 2013 by TBoneTX

[Vanitas 310]

Not in this thread, please.

Not once did I say in this thread, but I suggested to Novembro to create a separate thread for it all. More than once, in fact.

I am getting sick to death of being treated like I am some kind of retard.

Edited July 29, 2013 by Ryan&Amy

[Caryh 5,206]

Yea, it always seems like I started to see things from a different perspective since my Asia trip. At times it seems like tiff never married out of the family she grew up with. Everything reverts back to her parents and sisters. I'm cheap because I want her to keep her money in "our" family. I'm selfish because I don't want to give everything I own to her sister......and I don't want to let her other sister live in my house for free forever.....meantime, who bought the iphone for her brother? And jewelry for the sisters and mom? Yet I'm cheap.......and selfish.....

The irony is I used to say to my friends "I'm not married, my wife is married"......

Lmao.....

You weren't aware with most Asian born girls you marry the family, not just the woman? At least I was aware of this going in. Discussed it also, on how far I was willing to let it go, and what the limits were. She still would like to push them, but I tell her no. If I let her, she'd work 80 hours a week and send everything to family back home.

[SAT 9,609]

You weren't aware with most Asian born girls you marry the family, not just the woman? At least I was aware of this going in. Discussed it also, on how far I was willing to let it go, and what the limits were. She still would like to push them, but I tell her no. If I let her, she'd work 80 hours a week and send everything to family back home.

How far is far enough? Am I responsible for providing for her sisters for life? Even after they're married?

The in laws I don't mind. But when Tiffany blindly supports her sisters. I now have a serious problem with that.

[SAT 9,609]

If you recall, tiff was ready to give her life savings away to an already well to do sister, without regard for our own daughter...

You know, I don't even mind that....but to tell me that I'm the one that's selfish......

[SAT 9,609]

You know, I've really had enough of this #######.....

[Caryh 5,206]

How far is far enough? Am I responsible for providing for her sisters for life? Even after they're married?

The in laws I don't mind. But when Tiffany blindly supports her sisters. I now have a serious problem with that.

Its a matter of setting ground rules early on and discussing it. You skipped that step early on, so now potentially the sky is the limit. It was never an issue before, and now its in your face. And no, you are not responsible for her sister forever. But Tiff is going to feel responsible, its kind of like a parent feeling responsible for a kid, even after they've grown up. Older siblings help younger siblings. All siblings help the parents. Throw in the guilt of her being in America and living a much better life, instead of back home grinding it out, and the spouse will feel they have to give too much. Get a devious and selfish sibling back home and they'll play that guilt to the hilt. Having been through the discussion before hand, and you have a basis on where to start the conversation when it comes up. Having ignored it the entire marriage, and you end up where you are. Feeling you spouse doesn't get it, while they think you don't get it. Both of you are right, neither gets the other, and neither was prepared for this coming up.

[SAT 9,609]

On top of that, she always believe her ill educated friends and family over me.....

If I point to a red car and say its red, she'll say no it's blue because my friend says so.....

These are the same people that ask tiff to ask me to do ####### for them every time they need something.....

She has this one friend that brags all the time about her english based education in Malaysia (schools there are separated by 3 languages), yet every time this b1tch needs the simplest thing written (such as employment verification so she can collect WIC), she asks tiff to ask me to do it.

You think tiff is smart enough to know that her friends don't know #######?

[SAT 9,609]

Her older sis lives in my basement for free. Her married younger sis was the one that had the 750000rm flat handed to her. Her family hardly lives in squalor.....

[Caryh 5,206]

If I were you Steve, you need to talk about what does the family need, and what does the family want. There are huge differences in those two things, and right now Tiff isn't seeing that. This is where you need to get her thinking, that her sisters wants are not needs. Doesn't mean you don't throw a gift or two the sister's way, but when gifts for wants get no appreciation shown, Tiff will start to see that her sister is selfish and ungrateful. Or she might start to see that her sister is creating her own problems. If you're mister no all the time, then you're going to be viewed as the problem. You need to give a little rope to that sister, and let her hang herself. I've got a brother in-law who's done that already. I've still bailed his butt out of trouble once, his life was truly in danger, but my wife sees that there is no helping him and his wife, because they're creating their own problems. Had I just said no, my wife would have been all over my butt. Instead I let her say no.

[Caryh 5,206]

Her older sis lives in my basement for free. Her married younger sis was the one that had the 750000rm flat handed to her. Her family hardly lives in squalor.....

Yep, then let Tiff send a few gifts to the sister and watch the sister be ungrateful.

I'm not sure why the one sister lives in your basement. What's the back story on that? Is she legal?

[Jacque67 7,328]

Her older sis lives in my basement for free. Her married younger sis was the one that had the 750000rm flat handed to her. Her family hardly lives in squalor.....

OMG Steve, you have got yourself into a real pickle. How long have you guys been married? Do you have any relatives that you could insist be prioritized above her family? Does she come from a small village? Often people who do, no what country, a stubborn and less open to change. Didn't you lay any ground rules before you had a child? seems like you need a serious talk- maybe some counseling. Good luck!

[SAT 9,609]

But we already went thru this before. Tiff is blind.

I pay for everything here. I mean everything.

Tiff goes to work, and saves nothing. Where does the money go?

[SAT 9,609]

Frenchy you had to follow the long story from the beginning of the year. Her family is not poor. Her parents are good and not looking for anything.

Her older sis and her hubby are losers. And have a savage 5 year old that can do no wrong (he's in Malaysia)

Her younger sis want to live like the queen of England.

Her younger bro doesn't think he should have to toil

Her other younger sis is the one with a good brain, and is struggling.