K-1 Visit (merged)

[Kolewenoik31 57]

Greetings, I am not being a sexiest as I was called once but I must ask for the ladies to answer these questions..plz I am planning on seeing my fiance for the first in person meeting at the end of this year. Now we have been courting since Jan 2013 but we first started talking in Aug/Sept 2012. I was wondering with all the warnings that I am getting from a few friends and travel warnings of me being careful and to take someone with me. What is the experience of the ladies here traveling to met their fiance for the first time?

1. Did you take someone?

2. If you did not what precautions did you take?

3. If you did not have anyone to take would you still have gone?

I know there are a bunch more questions that I could think of but my mind is drawing a blank now. But basically we all know that we must meet our fiance's once within two years for immigration purposes and that we will be denied for it if we don't. Life basically stops or is put on hold until then. I trust, and love my fiance very much and I know God brought us together for this reason but I just wanted to hear some experiences from others. Tracy~

[The Mean Lady 604]

Is your inquiry meant because of the area you're traveling to, or just because you're meeting someone you've never met?

If it's the latter, here's my story.

I've met about 25 people offline in the past 8-ish years.

2 of which I dated.

I always met people either in groups (mainly because I met a lot of friends) and/or in well lit/traveled places.

I was not the smartest when I met my husband for the first time (as a friend).

I met him at a hotel.

He came to my room almost immediately.

I suppose I could have died.

I talked to him for about 2 months prior to meeting.

Honestly, probably a stupid decision.

I am not against meeting people alone as long as it's in well lit/traveled areas.

Just maybe next time(?) not straight into a hotel room to hang out lmao

He also stayed with me for the next 2 days in the room hanging out.

I could have died.

OH but also be sure you give your travel info to friends/family so if anything DOES happen, they're well aware of your intentions, travel plans and contact info you had ahead of time.

PS- Yes, I intentionally am saying we hung out.

I don't want people thinking I took my new friend to a hotel room to have tons of wild crazy sex.

We were just friends.

[danver 15]

Greetings, I am not being a sexiest as I was called once but I must ask for the ladies to answer these questions..plz I am planning on seeing my fiance for the first in person meeting at the end of this year. Now we have been courting since Jan 2013 but we first started talking in Aug/Sept 2012. I was wondering with all the warnings that I am getting from a few friends and travel warnings of me being careful and to take someone with me. What is the experience of the ladies here traveling to met their fiance for the first time?

1. Did you take someone?

2. If you did not what precautions did you take?

3. If you did not have anyone to take would you still have gone?

I know there are a bunch more questions that I could think of but my mind is drawing a blank now. But basically we all know that we must meet our fiance's once within two years for immigration purposes and that we will be denied for it if we don't. Life basically stops or is put on hold until then. I trust, and love my fiance very much and I know God brought us together for this reason but I just wanted to hear some experiences from others. Tracy~

depend on where u going and what part of the Philippines? if u are going to a big city like Manila,, dress comfortably coz it is really hot there and do not act like u have lots of $$$$. People there sometimes see a white man (foreigner) as lots of $$$. so be careful and be watchful.

[The Mean Lady 604]

depend on where u going and what part of the Philippines? if u are going to a big city like Manila,, dress comfortably coz it is really hot there and do not act like u have lots of $$$$. People there sometimes see a white man (foreigner) as lots of $$$. so be careful and be watchful.

Where did the Philippines specifically come into play lol?

I think OP is directly related to Kenya, though not for sure if sh 's going there to meet someone...

Unless I'm misreading something.

[Jawaree 718]

I thought it was to Kenya

[KayDeeCee 4,895]

depend on where u going and what part of the Philippines? if u are going to a big city like Manila,, dress comfortably coz it is really hot there and do not act like u have lots of $$$$. People there sometimes see a white man (foreigner) as lots of $$$. so be careful and be watchful.

The OP is not a man, and their profile indicates their fiance is in Kenya so not sure why you assumed they were a man and would be visiting the Philippines.

OP> I think not meeting alone or out in a public place would be the safest bet.

[Kolewenoik31 57]

Is your inquiry meant because of the area you're traveling to, or just because you're meeting someone you've never met?

If it's the latter, here's my story.

I've met about 25 people offline in the past 8-ish years.

2 of which I dated.

I always met people either in groups (mainly because I met a lot of friends) and/or in well lit/traveled places.

I was not the smartest when I met my husband for the first time (as a friend).

I met him at a hotel.

He came to my room almost immediately.

I suppose I could have died.

I talked to him for about 2 months prior to meeting.

Honestly, probably a stupid decision.

I am not against meeting people alone as long as it's in well lit/traveled areas.

Just maybe next time(?) not straight into a hotel room to hang out lmao

He also stayed with me for the next 2 days in the room hanging out.

I could have died.

OH but also be sure you give your travel info to friends/family so if anything DOES happen, they're well aware of your intentions, travel plans and contact info you had ahead of time.

PS- Yes, I intentionally am saying we hung out.

I don't want people thinking I took my new friend to a hotel room to have tons of wild crazy sex.

We were just friends.

Well it could be the area and the fact that I have never met face to face. A pastor friend of mine use to sponsor my fiance's orphanage {1 1/2 yrs}. In April they separated the two ministries. He has met him personally on a few occasions and he was able to brief me on what he is like in person and his character. This pastor stayed in the orphanage with my fiance when he went there for a couple weeks both times. The travel expense is so high as you may know. Now I will be meeting him at the Nairobi airport but we will be going back to his place or he said I could rent a room there. But for the length of time that I want to go 4-6 weeks that might be really expensive not only that I don't know if there is housing in the town where he is from, its 4 hrs away. Its a big town with half a million people so there is probably housing but maybe more expensive. We are both Christians and sometimes for a lot of people that may not mean much but for us consummation is meant for the wedding night. So I say all that to say that my options are limited and I am trying to make a safe, smart, decision and its not a lack of trust but out of caution. Thank you for your response

[Kolewenoik31 57]

depend on where u going and what part of the Philippines? if u are going to a big city like Manila,, dress comfortably coz it is really hot there and do not act like u have lots of $$$$. People there sometimes see a white man (foreigner) as lots of $$$. so be careful and be watchful.

Well I guess those two are out of the box I am neither rich nor white I will be going to Kenya!!! Thank you

[Kolewenoik31 57]

I am only part man wo-man I am all female. Am I the only one that is traveling to met their fiance alone...or should I say without a chaperone?

[Kolewenoik31 57]

Greetings, I am not being a sexiest as I was called once but I must ask for the ladies to answer these questions..plz I am planning on seeing my fiance for the first in person meeting at the end of this year. Now we have been courting since Jan 2013 but we first started talking in Aug/Sept 2012. I was wondering with all the warnings that I am getting from a few friends and travel warnings of me being careful and to take someone with me. What is the experience of the ladies here traveling to met their fiance for the first time?

1. Did you take someone?

2. If you did not what precautions did you take?

3. If you did not have anyone to take would you still have gone?

I know there are a bunch more questions that I could think of but my mind is drawing a blank now. But basically we all know that we must meet our fiance's once within two years for immigration purposes and that we will be denied for it if we don't. Life basically stops or is put on hold until then. I trust, and love my fiance very much and I know God brought us together for this reason but I just wanted to hear some experiences from others.

Adding this from an earlier post....A pastor friend of mine use to sponsor my fiance's orphanage {1 1/2 yrs}. In April they separated the two ministries. He has met him personally on a few occasions and he was able to brief me on what he is like in person and his character. This pastor stayed in the orphanage with my fiance when he went there for a couple weeks both times. The travel expense is so high as you may know. Now I will be meeting him at the Nairobi airport but we will be going back to his place or he said I could rent a room there. But for the length of time that I want to go 4-6 weeks that might be really expensive not only that I don't know if there is housing in the town where he is from, its 4 hrs away. Its a big town with half a million people so there is probably housing but maybe more expensive. We are both Christians and sometimes for a lot of people that may not mean much but for us consummation is meant for the wedding night. So I say all that to say that my options are limited and I am trying to make a safe, smart, decision and its not a lack of trust but out of caution. Tracy!

Edited June 26, 2013 by John and Tracy

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

The only thing I can add is this.

Try to spend as much time as possible in real life situation with him. Staying in a hotel and being pampered is not real life per see.

As far as safety I have no idea. I am not a fan of online meeting. Not knocking it as many people I respect have met their partners that way.

Good luck.

PS: Could you time a visit with your Pastor friend?

[Falene 8]

I went alone the first time I met my fiance in person. It was probably the craziest thing I've ever done. My mother was terrified, but she had all my contact info and hotel info. She also made me email her everyday so she knew that I was still ok. Like KDH said, I could have died. Before I met him, I had talked to many other people online. I was more afraid to drive 6 hours to meet someone in the next state than to fly to India to meet my fiance. (I never met the other person.) I trusted him and I felt safe with him.

I think it's good that your friend has already met him. Still, make sure someone knows where you are staying and has good contact information for you. I hope you have a great time and a safe trip!

[KayDeeCee 4,895]

I went alone the first time I met my husband face-to-face. I had already been talking to him online, webcam and phone for 3 years though. I was not afraid. I stayed with him in his home for a couple months.. hanging out, sight seeing, and meeting his friends and family. That was not a visit that qualified for the I-129F petition. I had no idea I would be filing back then.

Edited June 26, 2013 by Jay-Kay

[Kolewenoik31 57]

The only thing I can add is this.

Try to spend as much time as possible in real life situation with him. Staying in a hotel and being pampered is not real life per see.

As far as safety I have no idea. I am not a fan of online meeting. Not knocking it as many people I respect have met their partners that way.

Good luck.

PS: Could you time a visit with your Pastor friend?

Now as for the hotel and being pampered that won't happen . Hotels are expensive. I was not a fan of online meeting either was not planned. Just something that happened and then it grew as I partnered with him in ministry. As for the pastor friend he went in April and I don't know if he is planning another trip this year, we are not close friends he just use to pastor a church that I was a part of years ago. Also he and my fiance parted ways still brethren but agreeing to go on with their individual ministries. Two separate visions if you know what I mean! We timing my visit was in the initial plan earlier this year but now....

[Mel&Lal 12]

Well I met my fiance for the first time in March 2013. I was going to India and my whole family was worried sick because they thought I was going to get hurt. I went alone but he had lots of friends with him and I think that was more for my safety because he promised my mom I would return safe. I did contact the embassy in delhi to let them know I was there and I called my mom twice daily.

Now when we did leave the hotel my fiance always had a friend with him, and this was my first time out of the USA. I also did a lot of cultural research to make sure I was respectful to the people also.

Now I do admit it was scary going alone but in the end I felt safe and had a wonderful experiance and can't wait to go back to India when he has his interview!

I wish you luck in whatever you do!