very sad. please help

[evalyn 0]

am new in posting but i have been reading alot of love stories here.. mostly i come here to read happy love stories...now my problem is, since i came to the US 2 months ago things have really been weird my husband for 10years is acting up..he is dating someone else and leaves me with our daughter inthe house to go spend time with her..am really cursing my coming here but at the same time cant just leave since our daughter has been here for 6years and is not willing to come with me..I dont know how to handle this since i kind of think am responsible for this...am HIV positive and my husband is negative and he knew this even before the petition..am feeling lost and confused and dont know exactly how to react..if we get divorced what will happen to me? i got a 10years GC.right now am not working and am not even familiar with the this place.am sooo sad am missing love

[HeatDeath 430]

I'm sorry to hear about the problems you're having.

After the 10 year green card, your marriage has nothing to do with being able to stay in the US. The only difference is that people who are still married to the USC spouse they got their green card through can apply for citizenship after 3 years instead of having to be a PR for 5 years like most people. If you've been a permanent resident for longer then 5 years already there are no immigration consequences to getting a divorce at all. Divorcing won't affect your immigration status either way.

Much bigger consequences could be your access to health insurance and/or HIV medication. If that's coming through your husband's health insurance and you're not working, you could be cut off after a divorce. You should definitely look very carefully at whatever public health assistance programs your state offers. A lot of states will provided basic health services if you cannot afford them. Look at your options very carefully before doing anything you can't reverse.

[Rahstyles 10]

What country are you from?

[NikLR 13,232]

*** moving to moving here and your new life in America ***

Honestly I think you and your husband need to get some counselling specific to your situation. I'm very sorry for everything you are going through.

[CaroSL 68]

You have been married for 10 year, your daughter have been here for 6 years, and you have been here for 2 months?

If you guys have been separated for a very long time, the readjusting might be tough. If he made you come here, he must have some reasons surely.

You guys need to talk this through. You need to find out why did he make you come here if he wanted to date other people? Why is he even dating other people? Is there something you can do about it?

But most importantly, what do you want? Do you still love him?

And, yes, as Niki says, counselling might be a very good idea

I think HeatDeath has very good, very rational advice. Don't rush into anything before checking those up.

[Peter_Pan 661]

Try looking for a job?

[evalyn 0]

thanks all for your advice am currently looking for a job and it seems my huby brought me here for the sake of our daughter he keeps on saying that he could have prospered if not for my daughter and the kid he had with another woman

[stevie b 141]

thanks all for your advice am currently looking for a job and it seems my huby brought me here for the sake of our daughter he keeps on saying that he could have prospered if not for my daughter and the kid he had with another woman

if that is how he talks to you, I don't think counseling is really a way to go.. sounds more like divorce and move on

[awkwardsoul 20]

I'd be very concerned for any medical coverage interruption - a disruption with any HIV medication could make it not effective, and get more costly for newer cocktails (I've heard as much as $10k a month). I'd make sure you got a good float of money or cash coming from the divorce. I'd also check any HIV+ groups in your area for more suggestions, support and counselling. There you could also meet more people.