No idea where to start! Advice needed

[laurenmat 2]

Hi there,

I would love some advice for somebody who is/has been in my shoes and I would be so grateful if I could talk to somebody!

I am 22 and I am from Kent in the U.K. I met my current boyfriend, 24, last year whilst I was in California visiting family. He is from Lake Elsinore, CA. He has visited me since and I have just got back from visiting him where he proposed to me. I, of course, said yes!! We are extremely happy.

One big problem is that we have miles away from each other. We plan on getting married in 2015 but preferably would like to get married in the U.K.

I have read briefly some stories on here of being applying for VISAS etc to be in America with there significant others and would just like to know where to start on how to be with him. Ideally, we don't want to go from being without eachother to getting married. I would love to go there as soon as I possibly can to spend time in my future home and with his family who I adore.

I haven't been to university but I did go to a community college here in Kent where I studied Secretarial Admin and Legal Sec and I have had several jobs so I do have some skills.

I just would like some advice as to what you guys think I should do or have done themselves. I was planning on going to California in December for 3 months to actively seek work but I don't even know if that is allowed in itself?

I am sorry to sound so naive, I have contacted advisory services but I thought an informal forum would be equally if not more helpful. My boyfriend had never met a Brit before me so he hasn't a clue about any of it either!

I would be so so grateful. I am sure there are many of you that have been in my position but I am literally just dying to be with him. We have been away from eachother for a week today and I am just god damn miserable.

Thanks in advance guys!

Lauren

[Inky 1,111]

I have moved your post from the K-1 forums to the general forums as you are still trying to choose what path to take and have not filed a K-1 petition as of yet.

Here is a link to show you the types of visas, the costs and some information on them http://www.visajourney.com/content/compare

I'm not sure what you mean by you don't want to go from being apart to being married? The information above is for fiance(e) and spousal visas.

If you want to marry in the UK then the US citizen needs a special document to be allowed to go to the UK to marry.

Here is the link to the UK specific forums http://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/99-united-kingdom/

If you are not looking to get married you can travel to visit but not stay or you can look into schools and getting a student visa to attend school in the USA.

[J & L 10]

If you go to the USA as a visitor you're not allowed to work, unless you have some sort of visa that allows you to stay there and work/ study.

If you'd like to get a K1 visa, you have 90 days to get married. Of course before that there's a whole bunch of documents to file and you have to wait for months to get approved and all that.
If you'd like to get married in the UK, then do your own research and ask what he'd need to get married to you in your country.

Anyway, if you'd like you could visit him again and spend a little more time with him and then file for the K1 visa together, wait it out until everything gets sorted out and then get married once you have your visa in hand.

[LeftCoastLady 441]

If you want to marry in the UK, be sure to read up on the UKBA requirements: http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/visas-immigration/while-in-uk/marriageandcivilpartnership/

From there, the US citizen would be able to start the spousal petition process.

[canadian_wife 1,822]

There are no boyfriend visas, sorry, but unless you have an employer looking to sponsor you, it doesn't look like you'll be able to spend large amounts of time in the US. The secretarial/admin field is not an in-demand one so it will be difficult for you to find sponsorship.

If you are looking to marry in the UK then your only option is to file the spousal visa after you get married.

good luck

[Jo Amelia Finlay 20]

My two pennies:

Unfortunately relationships such as ours have to take a bit of an "unconventional" path. If the thought of going from meeting, being in love and a long distance thing then essentially BANG we're married is a bit much, then all I can suggest is that you maintain a long distance thing until there comes a time it feels right, then submit the application for a fiance (or spousal if you like) visa*. You can visit one another and spend time together during holidays like that, but there aren't many options at all for the living together for a while before tying the knot thing (like you would if you were both in the same country!).

Unless of course you can afford to study over there, or are lucky enough to land a job (NB: I don't mean to make light of these options, it's just I have no experience of them myself so cannot offer advice) and then you two can be together without the pressure of matrimony because you've another legit reason to be in the country.

I feel your pain, I do. It took a little bit for my bloke and I to look at one another and go "Okay, let's do this" because it's huge in so many ways; not only the marriage side of things - even if you know they are the one, the timescale feels a little wonky for some relationship steps! - but also knowingly entangling yourself in a process which is often long, expensive, sometimes confusing and also can be pretty tough going. A bit like getting married, I think you know when you're ready to undertake and when the positives vastly outweigh the negatives

Maybe get on Skype and have a big old chat about things. Do a tonne of research and see what you find and what your options are. Other members can correct me with this if I'm incorrect, but I would advise some caution with traveling now that you are engaged; even for a normal holiday over there you may want to load up on ties to the UK as being betrothed to a US citizen clearly marks you as someone with interests in being in the country permanently.

Anyway, enough heavy stuff and doom and gloom! Congrats! All the best for your future together, however you decide to tackle it

Also where in Kent are you from?? I grew up in Medway!

*Edited to add: Personally I've also no clue about the procedures to get married over here (UK) so can't offer a view on that side of things, sorry!

Edited June 4, 2013 by Jo Amelia Finlay

[mpheonix 7]

Well, you have several options, I outlined the US K1 Journey process in this thread here. However, if you're asking what you can do, I can only really help when it comes to the process in the US.

You have several options:

1. Apply for a K1 visa and marry in the US.
2. Get Married outside the US and apply for a CR1 (spousal immigrant) visa. This takes about the same amount of time as a K1, but it's cheaper, fees wise, and once you enter the US you're legally a citizen; no applying for an Adjustment of Status (AoS).
3. Get Married in the UK and immigrate him to the UK.

I'm sure there are more options than that, but since you haven't told us where you plan to live we can't guide you in the right direction.

So in order to help you more, can you answer us a few questions:

1. Where do you and your partner want to live after you're married?
2. Is dual citizenship important?
3. Do you have the desire and ability to do a destination wedding?

Thanks!

[LeftCoastLady 441]

Well, you have several options, I outlined the US K1 Journey process in this thread here. However, if you're asking what you can do, I can only really help when it comes to the process in the US.

You have several options:

1. Apply for a K1 visa and marry in the US.
2. Get Married outside the US and apply for a CR1 (spousal immigrant) visa. This takes about the same amount of time as a K1, but it's cheaper, fees wise, and once you enter the US you're legally a citizen; no applying for an Adjustment of Status (AoS).
3. Get Married in the UK and immigrate him to the UK.

I'm sure there are more options than that, but since you haven't told us where you plan to live we can't guide you in the right direction.

So in order to help you more, can you answer us a few questions:

1. Where do you and your partner want to live after you're married?
2. Is dual citizenship important?
3. Do you have the desire and ability to do a destination wedding?

Thanks!

What I highlighted in red is very, very incorrect. Obtaining the CR-1 visa makes one a legal permanent resident, but they are not a U.S. citizen.

[mpheonix 7]

permanent resident*

Pardon my poor choice of words I'm at work, and was rushed when explaining.

[laurenmat 2]

Thank you all for your input. My brain is a bit boggled so let me just ask a couple more questions if you don't mind

Is it against the law to say (hypothetically) marry him in a registry office (in the US) at the end of the year? Do you always need a K1 visa prior to getting married? Or is that just if you want to live there for 90 days before?

It's difficult because you can't really have a planned wedding then can you if you have to await your K1 visa and then have 90 days to do it in!

Thank you!

[laurenmat 2]

My two pennies:

Unfortunately relationships such as ours have to take a bit of an "unconventional" path. If the thought of going from meeting, being in love and a long distance thing then essentially BANG we're married is a bit much, then all I can suggest is that you maintain a long distance thing until there comes a time it feels right, then submit the application for a fiance (or spousal if you like) visa*. You can visit one another and spend time together during holidays like that, but there aren't many options at all for the living together for a while before tying the knot thing (like you would if you were both in the same country!).

Unless of course you can afford to study over there, or are lucky enough to land a job (NB: I don't mean to make light of these options, it's just I have no experience of them myself so cannot offer advice) and then you two can be together without the pressure of matrimony because you've another legit reason to be in the country.

I feel your pain, I do. It took a little bit for my bloke and I to look at one another and go "Okay, let's do this" because it's huge in so many ways; not only the marriage side of things - even if you know they are the one, the timescale feels a little wonky for some relationship steps! - but also knowingly entangling yourself in a process which is often long, expensive, sometimes confusing and also can be pretty tough going. A bit like getting married, I think you know when you're ready to undertake and when the positives vastly outweigh the negatives

Maybe get on Skype and have a big old chat about things. Do a tonne of research and see what you find and what your options are. Other members can correct me with this if I'm incorrect, but I would advise some caution with traveling now that you are engaged; even for a normal holiday over there you may want to load up on ties to the UK as being betrothed to a US citizen clearly marks you as someone with interests in being in the country permanently.

Anyway, enough heavy stuff and doom and gloom! Congrats! All the best for your future together, however you decide to tackle it

Also where in Kent are you from?? I grew up in Medway!

*Edited to add: Personally I've also no clue about the procedures to get married over here (UK) so can't offer a view on that side of things, sorry!

Jo, would love to speak to you directly about your story!

I am from Dartford though!

Thank you for the Congratulations

[LeftCoastLady 441]

Thank you all for your input. My brain is a bit boggled so let me just ask a couple more questions if you don't mind

Is it against the law to say (hypothetically) marry him in a registry office (in the US) at the end of the year? Do you always need a K1 visa prior to getting married? Or is that just if you want to live there for 90 days before?

It's difficult because you can't really have a planned wedding then can you if you have to await your K1 visa and then have 90 days to do it in!

Thank you!

I would recommend reading up on the K-1 process a bit more so you can understand it, if you decide to go that route. Once the K-1 visa is issued, one would have at most six months (this can vary) to enter the U.S. After they enter the U.S., you'd have 90 days to get married to fulfill the K-1 requirement. That would give you close to nine months to plan a wedding. Though, it only took us a few weeks to plan ours, so YMMV.

If you opt to marry and go for the CR-1, you can marry wherever you like as long as you follow the marriage license requirements for that location.

[laurenmat 2]

I would recommend reading up on the K-1 process a bit more so you can understand it, if you decide to go that route. Once the K-1 visa is issued, one would have at most six months (this can vary) to enter the U.S. After they enter the U.S., you'd have 90 days to get married to fulfill the K-1 requirement. That would give you close to nine months to plan a wedding. Though, it only took us a few weeks to plan ours, so YMMV.

If you opt to marry and go for the CR-1, you can marry wherever you like as long as you follow the marriage license requirements for that location.

Thank you. I wasn't aware that you had 6 months to enter the country, that's good.

So we can marry without getting the K1 visa first if we wanted to get married quickly, right? Can we get married without any visa and then apply for a CR-1?

[laurenmat 2]

Sorry, another question guys.

Say I applied for a k1 visa and it was approved whilst I was in the U.S. on vacation? I am planning on going there for Christmas for about 2 months. Would I still have the right to go home and wait up to 6 months?

Thank you

[stevie b 141]

Thank you. I wasn't aware that you had 6 months to enter the country, that's good.

So we can marry without getting the K1 visa first if we wanted to get married quickly, right? Can we get married without any visa and then apply for a CR-1?

you can get married any where any time

if you want to apply for a cr-1, then it only has to be a recognized marriage according to the us.. it is on the dos site somewhere in terms of which countries are recognized, but there are plenty

If you are coming during the holidays, most likely it will be with a tourist visa

either way you will have to have your interview in your home country

you do not need a visa to get married, you need a visa to enter the country