husband is a marijuana user.cant deal with it anymore

[VanessaTony 3,567]

First of all, do we know if the husband was the sponsor because did I read correctly he does not have a job? My advice is do what you think is best. If he is really growing this drug in the home then it will not be long for law enforcement to come because of the smell. Neighbors will report and I am not sure if they will deport you, I hope not. I would consult a lawyer asap...find another place to crash.....I hope everything works out for you. God bless.

The spouse is ALWAYS the primary sponsor, they can also ask for a co-sponsor but the husband is always primary.

[Brian1967## 119]

Okay, let us knock out the I864 issue, she can sue him but...IMHO it will be a waste of time and huge amounts of money, I have read enough and been threatened enough and blackmailed with this form, good luck suing him your marriage is to short to get spousal support in almost any state, so you will have to sue in federal court, good luck with that to, it is best to view the I864 as a contact between the government and the USC or LPR, the immigrant is the third party beneficiary to the document. that is that, the form is worth nothing to the immigrant unless she has about $10,000 for a retainer to sue so that is out the window here. next if he is growing the stuff get out NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! you can be put in prison, better yet the safest route would be returning home

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

Just wondering...the more I read some of the failed relationship after a few times

is the more I question, who may be wrong, not want to compromise, using the other

for their own gains and lord know what else....some of our men here go to seek passive

women elsewhere and the ladies sometimes know it, but for a way out they make sacrifices,

I am not saying this is the case with OP. however some were virgins, others were in love,

don't know the ways of the world, or cant speak proper English but they grasp the monetary

and immigration angle of things real fast, as to VJ they (some) see it as a learning center.

USC couples do have problems in relationships too, so stuff happens...I however I wish everyone

luck...& want to say if true love lies there think about counseling before financial gains.

DOS is at fault, well a portion of the fault.

Had they create a special class of visa for Fiance(e)/Husbands/Wives, to coem over for 6 months visit in the USA then most of this nonsense will never happen.

YMMV.

Lesson number 1: There are only 10% of good men (well to do ) in the states or western world , seek their mates from other countries, or one of their own.

Lesson number 2: You will be lucky if you find ones , and if you do, you are very lucky.

Lesson number 3: 90% are the BETA males , 40% of them still living with their parents, 30% have no steady jobs , 20% have no jobs at all

Lesson number 4: 50% have no higher education, 20% have no high school diploma, 20% college dropped out, 10% GED recipients

Lesson number 5: Just because they are from US or other western world, does not mean they are rich and or well to do , they lied out of their azz when they traveled to 3rd world countries.

Lesson number 6: Well to do men do not have more than 3 weeks( or if they lucky, 4 weeks) travel around the world, if they have a full time job.

Lesson number 7: If they need separate affidavit of support to bring you over, they are more likely won't be able to support you while you here.

Final lesson: It's takes two to tango, it's not all his fault , you wanted to come to the US so bad, so overlooked the obvious red flags. He told you these red flags.

I mildly concur but there is some truth therein.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

I'm sorry for his bad behavior towards you. I agree with others about talking to a lawyer about your options for divorce. I also agree it's best for you to get out of the house as soon as you can. It seems you already know the dangers of living with your spouse regarding their drug behavior. Here is some information regarding marijuana laws in Texas. LINK

[VanessaTony 3,567]

next if he is growing the stuff get out NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! you can be put in prison, better yet the safest route would be returning home

She has already stated she isn't living there:

.i am even now staying in his friends house coz he called them (a couple) to come pick me up

I also agree it's best for you to get out of the house as soon as you can.

See above. She no longer lives there.

[candy35 4]

dont go back their and get a job of your own honey dont be bother

[jameugiekaxavilon 25]

I am sorry to hear that you are going through this hardships. We truly don't know someone's personality unless we live in the same roof. As most of people around the world act as an angel during the time that they are still wanting to impress someone but changes once you both are together. I hope and pray that you can move on and start over.

[Pinkrlion 2,724]

First you need to leave the home, in the US as a RN, you cannot practice as a nurse with drug charges.

[Natsukiii 35]

Wow. I am so sorry for the problems you are experiencing. You mentioned that you knew about his drug use before and that he said he would stop as soon as you arrived here in the states. Did you ever ask him to stop right there and then when you found out? Why wait until you arrived? That would have been a red flag for me.

Anyway, you should consult an attorney like everyone else is recommending. Stay safe and please call 911 if you feel you are in danger. God bless.

Justin

Edited May 28, 2013 by Ema ♥ Jin

[Jawaree 718]

I tend to wanna agree if a person cant make it at the poverty line

and needs another to cosponsor maybe they are not yet ready to support

another new-comer... but all over relationships have ups and down...best

wishes young lady

[biaobiao 40]

hey OP... is it possible if you find a work.. and call the cops.. have them search your husband's house... if he is busted... it will be all in recorded.. you can use it against him in court just a suggestion..

i bet there are filipinos on that community... you can ask for help

Edited May 28, 2013 by biaobiao

[InHisTime 110]

Sis, hope you feel better now. I know how painful and hard it is for you especially that you are stranger there, with no family and trusted friends to run to.....but, mind you, God is with you in this journey. Pray for His guidance and protection. I'm sure our God will never leave you alone. Just be strong and stay focus on things that you should do.

You have received good advices in here, so try to take actions ASAP. Dealing with this kind of behavior is not easy. It seems that he doens't have RESPECT in your marriage. Throwing out your personal stuff, and letting you out of the house, etc. He is not a grown up man. "

I'm not sure if "counseling" will still work out for both of you. Your husband needs to voluntarily and fully submit himself to God and allow change of his character, it's not going to be an overnight process but there is always hope. If he is not willing to accept the Lord, then definitely he will never change. Only God can change him.

I'm glad, at least you are no longer with him in one roof. It's so dangerous to live together with his #######, knowing he is doing illegal things. You just did the RIGHT thing --- as early as now 2 months, at least you realized it than later, though I know it should have been a "huge red flag" before.

Always think of protecting yourself ahead, because this man might fabricate story and put yourself in danger when police authorities find it out.

Since you have your GC, you can already start looking for any decent job and save up so when you intend to come back home you have something to start with your child. I don't think you will get financial support from your husband, since you've said that he is jobless. And don't expect anything from him, he can't even support himself. It's not worth it. Just learn from this experience and stay strong.

Lastly, get consultation with lawyer if your are decided to file divorce....

Try to never look back or regret. Things happened for a reason, I'm sure this is a hard way, but it's gonna be alright, as long you always trust God and do the right thing. Keep your faith higher than ever. You will be fine and God bless.

[Nkemzo 1]

There are some people that look overseas for a mate because their behavior is so bad no one here will have them. They go over, behave well for a short period , sweep you off your feet and think that you will be helpless to walk away once you arrive. Your husband needs consuling. You both need consuling. He probably won't go. You can divorce in the US , you can stay. He signed an affidavit of support that says he will support you and your child. It is enforcable even if you aren't living in his house. Unless he goes to consuling and his behavior improves you shouldn't live in his house.

As far as i concerned moving to the US does not change your life completely the essence is for you to be with your love one if that doesn't work i suggest you go back to your country with or without green card or not,lets blive that love is what we are relocating for not becuase of extra issue..

[james&olya 1,121]

hey OP... is it possible if you find a work.. and call the cops.. have them search your husband's house... if he is busted... it will be all in recorded.. you can use it against him in court just a suggestion..

i bet there are filipinos on that community... you can ask for help

While I don't personally approve of marijuana use I find it offensive to hear someone advising an immigrant who knew what they were getting into how to use our draconian marijuana laws against a USC! Marijuana is no worse than alcohol (though not that much better either) and has been decriminalized in multiple jurisdictions even while it continues to be a federal crime to possess, use, or traffic in it. The day may not be far away when all criminal penalties for its use will be lifted. So don't be applying any double standard to its use you would not also apply to the use of alcohol!

To the OP, this man has stuck his neck out for you and gone to considerable expense to bring you here. Nobody is perfect. If you don't agree with his personal habits just ask for a divorce but don't try to ruin this poor man's life. He does not deserve this nastiness from someone he hoped to find love with!

[Olakunle39 11]

The spouse is ALWAYS the primary sponsor, they can also ask for a co-sponsor but the husband is always primary.

Being the fact the spouse is the PRIMARY sponsor, what can the wife legally get when he has no job. Let's say he does not have any assets, he might go to jail and if that happens he is upset and no telling what he will do. I don't think reporting to authorities is best because there is a child involved.