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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: China
Timeline
Posted

You are right brother i am from a MENA country .. she a reverted wearing hijab though you cann't imagine how stubborn she is and how much she like fight and quarrel.. she even drive to irving islamic center just to inquire about "khulaa" when i said "no way to divorce her". The problem comes from her childhood when her mom mistreated her and i always have been telling to consult a psy but sh keeps refusing.

What should i do when i am there lawfully speaking as my green card should be forwarded at her home adress in i think 45 days after my admittance to the US.

Oh wow. The Irving Islamic Center is one of the biggest ones in the state of Texas. I go there at least once a month and help out with the immigration clinic there.

If she's going there to get advice, well, it's pretty much over

unless

you can convince her to reconcile.

One of the things about reconciliation is that there has to be give and take. Since she's steamed you're staying on for the job, you might want to offer that up to her, to leave sometime in May.

Sometimes my language usage seems confusing - please feel free to 'read it twice', just in case !
Ya know, you can find the answer to your question with the advanced search tool, when using a PC? Ditch the handphone, come back later on a PC, and try again.

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Nigeria
Timeline
Posted

I was a little concerned that the OP didn't sound as concerned about the relationship as he was about the greencard. Take care of the relationship first, then there won't be GC issues. I think that's what most posters are focusing on. But the bottom line is, the visa is relationship based. If the relationship is over, it doesn't make sense to immigrate, unless that is the real goal. If you are only looking to immigrate, and the relationship isn't the primary reason for it, I see a problem with the visa. If the relationship is the only goal, and it falls apart, so does the visa. If it doesn't fall apart there is no visa issue.

I don't know where there is any question about where the GC is mailed. If you're together, it will be to your address. If you're not together why are you still coming? Is the relationship really the reason for the visa, or is the visa the goal and the relationship only the means?

Good luck with that.

You just spoke my mind. Everyone is here castigating the US spouse but how come OP is more focused on what happens to his greencard as opposed to salvaging his marriage? I would be wary of such actions too as his wife because it does not speak well of him. Are you the type of partner that will walk out of the marriage suddenly in future since you appear to be more focused on the immigration benefit at this time? Women can be loose with their tongue. she may have said she went to seek divorce advice just to emphasize her initial threat and make you come in sooner. Not that that was wise.

I was not the happiest wife when my husband delayed his coming in because he had to arrange to get his college transcripts mailed to the U.S for evaluation befoe he leaves. For days the conversation was strained. Even though I saw his reason but I just wanted him here ASAP. We worked it out, arrived at a compromise and he finally came in two days ago.

The two people involved need to really look into their marriage.

Best wishes to you both.

GOD has been WONDERFUL!!!
CR-1 (for Husband):
09/15/2012: Got Married
09/26/2012: Mailed I-130 from Nigeria( delayed by customs)
USCIS stage ( 66 days)
10/12/2012: NOA 1
12/17/2012: NOA 2 (case was transferred to NYC office 11/27/12)
NVC stage ( 20 days)
01/08/2013: Case # and IIN assigned ( file arrived NVC mail room 12/20/12)
01/09/2013: AOS invoiced and paid, DS-3032 emailed and mailed.
01/16/2013: IV invoiced &paid. AOS & IV mailed in one package(arrived 01/18).

01/28/2013: Case complete!!!
04/19/2013: Interview; APPROVED!!!!!
05/13/2013: POE; JFK


N-400: (3 months and 12 days)
Filed N-400 : 2011-06-17
Interview: 2011-09-27
Oath Ceremony: 2011-09-30

IR-5 for Mom Entire process took 5 months exactly
USCIS (22days)

mailed I-130 : 2011-09-30
NOA 1: 2011-10-03 (text & email)
NOA 2: 2011-10-25 (text and email)
NVC: (19 days)
Case entered and # assigned: 2011-11-18
NVC Case COMPLETED: 2011-12-07 ( 43 days from NOA 2 and 65 days from NOA 1)
Interview Date(Lagos): 2012-01- 23
Mom was late for interview
New Interview date: 2012-02-29 : VISA APPROVED

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Russia
Timeline
Posted

I was a little concerned that the OP didn't sound as concerned about the relationship as he was about the greencard. Take care of the relationship first, then there won't be GC issues. I think that's what most posters are focusing on. But the bottom line is, the visa is relationship based. If the relationship is over, it doesn't make sense to immigrate, unless that is the real goal. If you are only looking to immigrate, and the relationship isn't the primary reason for it, I see a problem with the visa. If the relationship is the only goal, and it falls apart, so does the visa. If it doesn't fall apart there is no visa issue.

I don't know where there is any question about where the GC is mailed. If you're together, it will be to your address. If you're not together why are you still coming? Is the relationship really the reason for the visa, or is the visa the goal and the relationship only the means?

Good luck with that.

Obviously many people immigrating on K-1 or CR-1 visas do so with a major reason being the change of country over the change in relationship status. But it may be that saying that one should automatically return where they came from if the relationship fails is a bit too much. Many people who uproot their lives to move from one region of the US to another to follow a romantic interest decide to stay put when the relationship fails. Why shouldn't the same be true of international moves? A great deal of work and preparation for making such a move has usually occurred and for many they have burned the bridges behind them, as people say. There is often not a job or home they can return to. So implying that seeking the visa was fraudulent (based on wanting an immigration benefit rather than following a true relationship) is not necessarily true even in cases such as this. This is, after all, an immigration process related site, not a marriage or relationship counselling site. Would you really want a situation where an immigrant always had their visa cancelled when a relationship failed prior to citizenship? That would distort the dynamics of the relationship in some potentially very unhealthy ways.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
Timeline
Posted

I don't think processes should be cancelled for failed relationships, unless the initial process hasn't even completed yet. If someone has immigrated to the US, is setting up a life, putting down roots and the relationship fails I totally support them being able to carry on with their life. The visa processes support that. But the purpose of family based visas is to reunite families. My fiancée's visa was just approved this week. She should visa in hand next week and travel here the following. If our relationship ends today I don't think she should still be entitled to move to the US, however. Even if we were married now I don't think that entitlement should exist. The point of the visa is to reunite us. If there is no "us" I don't see the purpose of the visa, unless it is simply to immigrate regardless.

I wouldn't suggest in that case that it was a fraudulent application. I would say, however, that if she decided to come anyway and expect to stay and work based on the family visa (not totally applicable in my case, since the K-1 doesn't give work benefits on its own, but certainly applicable in the OP's) that it wouldn't seem to make any sense. The OP may have given notice at his job but he's certainly still working, which was the reason given for the relationship issues, so they likely could continue to work there or find other employment there more easily than coming to the US, alone, single (or divorcing) with relatively fewer ties. If that happened then yes I would say the intent of the visa, at the time of travel, was immigration only, since the relationship on which the approval was given is over. The immigration intent at the time of travel would NOT be based on the relationship.

I am usually pretty lenient on folks, given the challenges I've had in my own life and visa situation. But for family/relationship based visas I totally expect the intent and focus to be the relationship, not the immigration. The concern for the green card seemed the larger issue. That's the only part that surprised me.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted

You married a USC on a conditional time frame if it does not work and there is no abuse, what is wrong with sending the immigrant back home? I mean they came here for you, now this guy does not have a BMW well he did not meet my expectations, time to move on, screw the USC. YES I love the immigration system

Filed: Country: Philippines
Timeline
Posted

It's really you who could make a decision -- knowing who she is. All I can say don't expect her to change when you get there. The things you mentioned about her are all red flags. You may work out with her but she needs to humble herself to God. You cannot change her - only God. And there is always HOPE. Pray hard....and follow what your instinct tells you. God bless.

"Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each one with a reason why I love you. I was doing great until I ran out of stars."-- by Kelsi

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
Timeline
Posted

Wow, yeah that's a huge red flag. This is the signal to bail!

I'd be way more concerned about your relationship and living situation than the green-card. You'd have to be a masochist to want to deal with that!

Posted

I'm curious: what's the OP's timeline? How long have you been married, how long have you been apart, and how did your marriage come about?

My relationship with my husband has been long distance on and off for four years, and it drives me nuts when I feel like he's putting his career or status ahead of the stability of our relationship. This is after living together, dating two years before we married and so on, so I never had any doubts about us being bona fide. He has always seemed to cope better with the distance, and is more likely to speak of practicalities like, for example, keeping a job an extra month for a reference. All he sees is the benefit, while I weigh the benefit with the collateral emotional damage that I know that seemingly trivial delay is going to cause, because at this point, there have been an awful lot of "trivial delays", both from his end, and from the bureaucracy.

No matter how you two began your relationship, if things have been difficult between you for a while because of distance or other issues (even if only your wife is really suffering), maybe she feels like your priorities have changed and is trying to protect herself?

  • 2 weeks later...
Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Romania
Timeline
Posted

He is wayy too preoccupied with his GC, I am guessing he plans on coming here and getting a hold of it anyway.


USCIS [*] 22 Nov. 2011 - I-129 package sent; [*] 25 Nov. 2011 - Package delivered; [*] 25 Nov. 2011 - NOA1/petition received and routed to the California Service Center; [*] 30 Nov. 2011 - Touched/confirmation though text message and email; [*] 03 Dec. 2011 - Hard copy received; [*]24 April 2012 - NOA2 (no RFEs)/text message/email/USCIS account updated; [*] 27 April 2012 - NOA2 hard copy received.

NVC [*] 14 May 2012 - Petition received by NVC ; [*] 16 May 2012 - Petition left NVC.

EMBASSY [*] 18 May 2012 - Petition arrived at the US Embassy in Bucharest; [*] 22 May 2012 - Package 3 received; [*] 24 May 2012 - Package sent to the consulate, interview date set; [*] 14 June 2012 - Interview date, approved.

POE [*] 04 July 2012 - Minneapolis/St.Paul. [*] 16 September 2012 - Wedding Day!

AOS/EAD/AP [*] 04 February 2013 - AOS/EAD/AP package sent; [*] 07 February 2013 - AOS/EAD/AP package delivered; [*] 12 February 2013 - NOA1 text messages/emails; [*] 16 February 2013 - NOA1 received in the regular mail; [*] 28 February 2013 - Biometrics letter received (appointment date, March 8th); [*] 04 March 2013 - Biometrics walk-in completed (9 out of 10 fingerprints taken, pinky would not give in); [*] 04 April 2013 - EAD/AP card approved; [*] 11 April 2013 - Combo card sent/tracking number obtained; [*] 15 April 2013 - Card delivered.

[*] 15 May 2013 - Moved from MN to LA; [*] 17 May 2013 - Applied for a new SS card/filed an AR-11 online (unsuccessfully), therefore called and spoke to a Tier 2 and changed the address; [*] 22 May 2013 - Address updated on My Case Status (finally can see the case numbers online); [*] 28 May 2013 - Letter received in the mail confirming the change of address; [*] 31 July 2013 - Went to Romania; [*] 12 September 2013 - returned to the US using the AP, POE Houston, everything went smoothly; [*] 20 September 2013 - Spoke to a Tier2 and put in a service request; [*] 23 September 2013 - Got "Possible Interview Waiver" letter (originally sent on August, 29th to my old address, returned and re-routed to my current address); [*] 1 October 2013 - Started a new job.

event.png

Trying to get the word out about our struggles:

http://voices.yahoo.com/almost-legal-citizen-but-not-quite-12155565.html?cat=9

 
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