I-864 Withdrawal and Separating from Wife

[TonyGutierrez 2]

I brought my wife to the United States on a K1, got married and sent the I-485 form along with my I-864. Ever since we got married things turned sour. We've been constantly having problems for one thing or another but most of the time we're fighting. It's come to the point I want to divorce and separate. The I-485 is still pending and I have sent letters to NBC to withdraw my affidavit of support (I-864) so that the I-485 gets denied. My wife just told me that was not going to leave no matter what because I married her. How can I get out of this relationship and return her back to her country? I'm feeling really guilty that we thought our relationship could work out but it didn't. I have offered to pay for everything for her to go back to her country but she refuses. Last time she told me that immigration had to come to our house and deport her personally for her to leave. This is causing a lot of stress in our lives. I just want to help her move back, divorce and part our ways. A few days ago she had a seizure and I had to take her to the hospital. Her recent health problems are adding guilt to the pain.

[Shiobhan 235]

Sorry its not working, would counseling help or are you just not a man that would want to deal with certain health issues (a lot of men cant)

if you reported the marriage over but it was in good faith I guess you want her out due to he I864, well you can call ICE on her but do you want

to do that to an ill person you once loved? I do understand you no longer love her. I wish both of you the best.

[doug/sherry 26]

I doubt the AOS will get approved anyways now that you want the affidavit of support withdrawn. It

just brought up red flags. Just becareful what you do...

[newacct 688]

The I-485 will probably be denied. Just file for divorce. Whether she leaves or not is not your concern. No need to report her or anything.

[TonyGutierrez 2]

The I-485 will probably be denied. Just file for divorce. Whether she leaves or not is not your concern. No need to report her or anything.

How can I get her to voluntarily leave my house? She said she won't sign the divorce documents so that's gonna slow things down.

[newacct 688]

How can I get her to voluntarily leave my house? She said she won't sign the divorce documents so that's gonna slow things down.

Well, is the house yours? I mean, how would a normal U.S. couple deal with this situation? This is a question of marriage and maybe tenant law in your state. This has nothing to do with immigration; immigration is the least of your worries.

[Fight for Love 98]

oh wow sorry u guys didn't work out.

but do u really want to do this? i mean you still love this person right? my relationship w/my husband is not like 100% perfect. we been up and down(god know's lol). but we are in agreement to save the marriage. i think ALL newly wed has experience this. why giving up? and why so soon? sorry for questioning u..i know i don't have that right

my ONLY advise...make sure to think twice or even more before doing something later that you might regret.

plus, never give up in a relationship. UNLESS you did 100% to save the relationship!!!

it takes two to tango. goodluck!!!

[TBoneTX 45,303]

*** Thread moved from main AOS/Family-Based forum to the Effects of Major Changes forum -- OP has ended the AOS process. ***

[dandk 72]

How can I get her to voluntarily leave my house? She said she won't sign the divorce documents so that's gonna slow things down.

As long as you two are still married, you cannot make your wife to leave your house. She has equal right as you even if you purchased the house prior marriage. In the eyes of the law, your house is considered as marital residence.

[Caryh 5,206]

As long as you two are still married, you cannot make your wife to leave your house. She has equal right as you even if you purchased the house prior marriage. In the eyes of the law, your house is considered as marital residence.

This is a matter handled at the state and local level, there are no uniform laws across the country to base advice on. What he has to do varies by location and the local laws he lives under. So what you're saying may be true where you live, but it certainly isn't true in all locations.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

As long as you two are still married, you cannot make your wife to leave your house. She has equal right as you even if you purchased the house prior marriage. In the eyes of the law, your house is considered as marital residence.

Agree with the Caryh, this is entirely dependent on their state. Also, you're not exactly correct. While she has a right to live there (for now) she is unlikely to get awarded the house, a portion of the house, or much of anything. They just haven't been married long enough. Again this varies from state to state.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

How can I get her to voluntarily leave my house? She said she won't sign the divorce documents so that's gonna slow things down.

Well here's the thing. Depending on your state, most of the time they're not going to make her move out if she has nowhere else to go.

Personally, I would file for divorce, including for the residence. I would also tell your attorney you want sole occupation of the house, including while the divorce is pending. Usually this will mean you will have to pay to support her in another place to live IF the judge orders that you can stay in the house that is (she can be escorted out of the residence by a sheriff if by court order she's supposed to leave). Most likely, because you earn money and she cannot, she will be given the residence to live in until the divorce is final, and you will need to pay the household bills until the divorce is final (electricity, gas, water etc).

I brought my wife to the United States on a K1, got married and sent the I-485 form along with my I-864. Ever since we got married things turned sour. We've been constantly having problems for one thing or another but most of the time we're fighting. It's come to the point I want to divorce and separate. The I-485 is still pending and I have sent letters to NBC to withdraw my affidavit of support (I-864) so that the I-485 gets denied. My wife just told me that was not going to leave no matter what because I married her. How can I get out of this relationship and return her back to her country? I'm feeling really guilty that we thought our relationship could work out but it didn't. I have offered to pay for everything for her to go back to her country but she refuses. Last time she told me that immigration had to come to our house and deport her personally for her to leave. This is causing a lot of stress in our lives. I just want to help her move back, divorce and part our ways. A few days ago she had a seizure and I had to take her to the hospital. Her recent health problems are adding guilt to the pain.

What country is she from? This can determine the proper way to handle this situation.

**Edit - I'm not sure what your letter to USCIS says, but you need to be careful around her so that she doesn't try and claim you're abusing her. It may be best to move out until you have this situation sorted out.

Edited April 23, 2013 by Vanessa&Tony

[Brian1967## 119]

Get away from her to avoid ANY abuse claim. She can file abuse in you, be very careful in your interactions with her. And remember most police departments are female friendly. IN THE WORDS OF SANDRAJ DO NOT BE ALONE WITH HER NOT EVEN FOR 5MIN.

[silvermug 16]

Oh wow, I'm sorry that it's not working out for you. But you're husband and wife. It sounds like you're kicking or dragging her out of the house. Is it really not something you could talk about? Meet halfway, kind of thing? :/

[Brian1967## 119]

Also you can change the locks and lock her out of thoe house, it JUST DEPENDS on the laws in your state, for human reasons do not lock her out as she will be on the street and this is never good, sleep on the couch to avoid any abuse claims, shower at seperate times to aviod her "abusing" herself and the calling police, I had to defened myself against false DV claim before it got to court it is not cheap and the emotional drain was almost unbearable. Please keep yourself safe your soon to be safe from harm and get her on the plane saftly and live your life.