American Girl Jamaican Guy

[Domineke 5]

Domineke, don't Get to happy now. That's apart of learning the Culture. Almost all Jamaicans (men & women alike) have 2-3 phones.

geeeez dont get too happy? you want me to have another sleepless nite? now i gots to worry bout how many phones he has?! its ok, i need to play devils advocate

[RICARDO4EVA2 194]

Not that I want you to have another sleep less night but just giving u the real deal. If u check my history on here.. Anyone will tell you I'll be honest.

ANYONE Who.would tell u that the many Jamaicans DOESN'T have 2+ phones........ THEY DO NOT KNOW JAMAICANS. As broke as some may be... They will invest into a phn before they even EAT.

[Domineke 5]

Not that I want you to have another sleep less night but just giving u the real deal. If u check my history on here.. Anyone will tell you I'll be honest.

ANYONE Who.would tell u that the many Jamaicans DOESN'T have 2+ phones........ THEY DO NOT KNOW JAMAICANS. As broke as some may be... They will invest into a phn before they even EAT.

lol ok then I know I can get the real deal from you, which is what I need

[AA100 19]

I am curious why you think this makes a difference in determining his character????

I am not in a position to judge anyone’s character but at the same time a persons’ intentions could be understood by analysing the personal traits and in doing so I could be completely/partially wrong. I believe anyone who is god fearing would never cause harm to his /her loved ones. I guess that should be the yard stick to judge goodness in one’s character. And I suppose Islandgal has addressed the issue in the best possible way.

[AA100 19]

Why would he want to move away from his daughter? Does he intend to pay child support after he moves here, does he pay it now? Either way it tells you a lot about his character, good or bad.

coloured? Did you just say that? I just cringed when I read that O_o

Hi

Thanks for your comment. If I offended anyone because I said 'Coloured' I am truly sorry about that. But I would also appreciate if you could share with me an alternative word that could be used for people who are non caucasian.

[StephAnn2012 50]

There is a difference in what I suggested and what you did. I don't condone snooping into his privacy. You know if he intended to cheat, deceive or lie, you would have seen nothing by design. If you say he does not use the internet, has no email or profiles on any singles sites, he is a very rare man indeed.

I am suggesting that if you two are going to be one (married) you should give him your passwords to your email accounts and get his email password to see. If he is not hiding anything, he will share it without hesitation. If he is, then he will stall. The same is true for you. If you have things you wouldn't want him to see on your accounts, then you two really shouldn't move forward toward marriage. You are clearly not ready for that level of commitment if that is the case.

Don't snoop, discuss and observe. This is not a game, it is a life changing event. Good luck to you.

[lisap 10]

Hi Dominek,

Ive been reading all the comments on here and i'm wondering what rock some of these peole crawled out of! ya'll need to stop sterotype and just know that all men are not the same....I was married to a american man that almost sent my black #### to my grave early...then God sen me a jamaican man which i did marry and he treasts me like a queen, I know plenty of women white and black that marries jamaican men and have no regrets....now has for your situation just take it slow and if you can date him a lill while longer before you marry him and bring him here, also one person did mention allowing him to buy your ticket from time to time, or even send you money it may not be much to you but its the thought that counts, treat him as you would any other man be smart and not generalize.

[lisap 10]

No-one on VJ can tell you what to do or how things are going to work out. None of us are in his head to know what his intentions are, even if they are good. Yes, Jamaican men (and all other types of men) woo women. Some do it for love and yes, there are some who just want the visa. NOONE KNOWS THAT FOR A FACT. I've seen and heard of good stories -- Jamaican men who meet American women and migrate to the US and their relationship lasted (even with different races, age gaps, etc.). There are other stories as well with negative endings. You just never know. Even if you were in the United States of American and dating another Black man you don't know for certain if it's going to last. No-one knows that, unless they're psychic. Only YOU TWO can make that decision. Only YOU know your man. The only thing I can say is to look for clues, red flags, etc.. and make your mind up from there.

On the topic of cheaters -- Jamaican, American, Asian, African and every culture of men cheat. Every man is different. I've heard of cheaters right here in the neighborhood and their wives live with them. It doesn't make a difference. Men and women cheat. Should I worry about that? Nope. I just focus on what I have to in my own relationship -- take care of business at home and my husband -- and live my life.

Real Talk islandgirl!!!!

[Domineke 5]

Hi

Thanks for your comment. If I offended anyone because I said 'Coloured' I am truly sorry about that. But I would also appreciate if you could share with me an alternative word that could be used for people who are non caucasian.

I'm a black girl, that works just fine with me lol

[Domineke 5]

There is a difference in what I suggested and what you did. I don't condone snooping into his privacy. You know if he intended to cheat, deceive or lie, you would have seen nothing by design. If you say he does not use the internet, has no email or profiles on any singles sites, he is a very rare man indeed.

I am suggesting that if you two are going to be one (married) you should give him your passwords to your email accounts and get his email password to see. If he is not hiding anything, he will share it without hesitation. If he is, then he will stall. The same is true for you. If you have things you wouldn't want him to see on your accounts, then you two really shouldn't move forward toward marriage. You are clearly not ready for that level of commitment if that is the case.

Don't snoop, discuss and observe. This is not a game, it is a life changing event. Good luck to you.

I didnt say I did any snooping, I said I was freeeee to do so. But since Ricardo has suggested that he probably has 2 or more phones it wouldnt matter if I did anyhow lol. He better damn not. In any case, although we have discussed marriage its not something I plan on doing this year or even next year. I'm not ready for that and neither is he, WE are'nt ready. Everyone seems to be rushing our relationship to that stage, I guess becuz its typical of these types of situations. But im not gonna jump on the marriage ship JUST so he can come here and be with me. My mom said to me just last nite "plz dont just marry him while ur over there" im like ma ####### im an idiot now? lol I know love makes us do some crazy things but I havent just thrown all my common sense out the window

[CoCo876 1]

WOW Domineke,

You really excited people with this discussion. I am impressed with your curiosity and zest to obtain the opinion of others. An extremely bold move as everyone's opinion will differ based on personal experience. What I have gathered from your posts (and I read through them all) is that you are very intelligent. You have already formulated your own ideas but request information from others who have walked this path before you. Wise move! You are doing the research. You have a very light and airy personality; you don't take these posts to heart and become overwhelmed and sensitive. I like that about you!

What you are doing is absolutely correct. I searched the internet many times over and found all of the very sad stories of others who have found themselves wounded and jilted by their Jamaican lover. Further, I have read stories of the stereotypical guy that cheats, womanizes, easily angers and is physically abusive. That helped me to keep my eyes open for what "could be". Giirrrlll, but that ain't my guy, lol! He is extremely sweet and has taught me a thing or two about life!

Continue to enjoy your trips to Paradise! Learn and have fun with your guy! Life is a gamble anyway. Just pay attention to the signs whatever they may be (good or bad) and you will be fine.

[Pinkrlion 2,713]

WOW Domineke,

You really excited people with this discussion. I am impressed with your curiosity and zest to obtain the opinion of others. An extremely bold move as everyone's opinion will differ based on personal experience. What I have gathered from your posts (and I read through them all) is that you are very intelligent. You have already formulated your own ideas but request information from others who have walked this path before you. Wise move! You are doing the research. You have a very light and airy personality; you don't take these posts to heart and become overwhelmed and sensitive. I like that about you!

What you are doing is absolutely correct. I searched the internet many times over and found all of the very sad stories of others who have found themselves wounded and jilted by their Jamaican lover. Further, I have read stories of the stereotypical guy that cheats, womanizes, easily angers and is physically abusive. That helped me to keep my eyes open for what "could be". Giirrrlll, but that ain't my guy, lol! He is extremely sweet and has taught me a thing or two about life!

Continue to enjoy your trips to Paradise! Learn and have fun with your guy! Life is a gamble anyway. Just pay attention to the signs whatever they may be (good or bad) and you will be fine.

Don't feed into the internet and stories of other people, you have to judge him for himself or herself. When you have hidden fears, whenever something happens you are ready to go on the defensive and it hinders the relationship. I am glad that you have a good man, but like everyone has stated here. MEN regardless of race, creed, color, or disability are cheaters and society has allowed this to be the norm. It is on TV, social media, magazines, etc... where men and women cheat and they are perfectly fine with that relationship.

If you do not want to be a part of this "new norm" is the latest catch phrase, then find someone else who believes the same.

[kashawn07 3]

Totally agree with pinkrlion. Society has made that the new norm which is very sad but you have to find that guy who believe in marriage for the long run, respect,and trust. Because if he respect you he wouldnt do something to hurt you. If he's honest he wont lie. But if you ever catch him in something such as cheating before your married Then highly think about if you're willing to be apart if that new norm.

[BeanCamp 28]

I can agree with the JA veteran posts. You can not judge based on others opinions. I too struggled with this notion of meeting someone and instantly feeling a connection. At first I was a bit apprehensive because of the distance and rumors. Then I realized, each relationship is different I couldn't take other opinions to form my own.

I was very open with communicating my concerns with my fiance. I knew I had nothing to lose with being open and honest. I have made as many trips as I could to JA to see if what we feel over distance was the same while together. We always split costs...although he does not have any children to care for. Each time we are physically together it feels like we were never been apart.

What I'm trying to let you know is...you never know. Only time will help you figure out if he is the one. Appreciate the distance, because all you have is communication. Which in my opinion, is essential for having great relationships. Also, look at your situation with an open mind and open heart. In time you will make a conclusion and stick with it. Best of luck.

[Domineke 5]

WOW Domineke,

You really excited people with this discussion. I am impressed with your curiosity and zest to obtain the opinion of others. An extremely bold move as everyone's opinion will differ based on personal experience. What I have gathered from your posts (and I read through them all) is that you are very intelligent. You have already formulated your own ideas but request information from others who have walked this path before you. Wise move! You are doing the research. You have a very light and airy personality; you don't take these posts to heart and become overwhelmed and sensitive. I like that about you!

What you are doing is absolutely correct. I searched the internet many times over and found all of the very sad stories of others who have found themselves wounded and jilted by their Jamaican lover. Further, I have read stories of the stereotypical guy that cheats, womanizes, easily angers and is physically abusive. That helped me to keep my eyes open for what "could be". Giirrrlll, but that ain't my guy, lol! He is extremely sweet and has taught me a thing or two about life!

Continue to enjoy your trips to Paradise! Learn and have fun with your guy! Life is a gamble anyway. Just pay attention to the signs whatever they may be (good or bad) and you will be fine.

You're too kinddddddd

what if were talking about the same guy lol that wouldnt be fun