she doesnt want to support my petition anymore

[marian79 0]

Hi everybody.

I met my wife in 2009 and in 2010 we decided to get married. Everything was good between us at the beginning. after I was able to travel we went on a cruise, we went together in my country so she can meet my family, we bought a car, later on we bought a house too. Last year she got pregnant but she lost the baby:( and since then I have the feeling that everything changed.

At the end of January we send the papers for the removal of condition, but right now she went crazy and she doesn't want to support my petition anymore , sending an affidavit trying to say that I married her for the wrong reason.

I want to know what should I expect right now, what should I do next. How can she say something like this when we bought a car, a house and she was pregnant too?

[Inky 1,110]

Moved from ROC forums to effects of major family changes on immigration as the OP should get better help/ answers here than the regular ROC forums.

[YA 1127 6]

Hi everybody.

I met my wife in 2009 and in 2010 we decided to get married. Everything was good between us at the beginning. after I was able to travel we went on a cruise, we went together in my country so she can meet my family, we bought a car, later on we bought a house too. Last year she got pregnant but she lost the baby:( and since then I have the feeling that everything changed.

At the end of January we send the papers for the removal of condition, but right now she went crazy and she doesn't want to support my petition anymore , sending an affidavit trying to say that I married her for the wrong reason.

I want to know what should I expect right now, what should I do next. How can she say something like this when we bought a car, a house and she was pregnant too?

Did you do something to her to make her feel this way . Maybe a marrige counselor can help you guys resolve any pending issues.

sometime women get very sensitive and start thinking things that seem crazy to men but to us they are good and we even have rationale to back it up lol , dont beat yourself up , try to talk to her and see whats going on with her or where she has her mind,.

[UK-USA-K1 128]

Hi everybody.

I met my wife in 2009 and in 2010 we decided to get married. Everything was good between us at the beginning. after I was able to travel we went on a cruise, we went together in my country so she can meet my family, we bought a car, later on we bought a house too. Last year she got pregnant but she lost the baby:( and since then I have the feeling that everything changed.

At the end of January we send the papers for the removal of condition, but right now she went crazy and she doesn't want to support my petition anymore , sending an affidavit trying to say that I married her for the wrong reason.

I want to know what should I expect right now, what should I do next. How can she say something like this when we bought a car, a house and she was pregnant too?

First and foremost, I want to tell you how sorry I am for the loss of your baby. That is, by far, the most important part of what I just read (IMO)

As far as your relationship goes, you say that it was real because you bought stuff and she got pregnant, but do you realize that true relationships are not about the stuff you buy or even making babies? There needs to be a true connection and real love.

Now, you may have felt that and she may have felt that, and the loss of the baby could have adjusted both of your emotions. I could easily see that. The loss of a baby can often be something that couples can never recuperate from.

I understand the importance of your status, but if you focus primarily on your status, then you are missing out on the whole reason for your being here in the first place, and that was the love you had for your wife.

If you truly did and do love her, then concentrate on making that a priority right now. If you don't, then the rest means nothing.

I'd recommend serious soul searching, and decide for yourself what is important to you.

This probably isn't what you came to hear, and you are free to ignore my advice, but it is what it is, and I hope it helps in some small way

[vegas12 12]

Hi everybody.

I met my wife in 2009 and in 2010 we decided to get married. Everything was good between us at the beginning. after I was able to travel we went on a cruise, we went together in my country so she can meet my family, we bought a car, later on we bought a house too. Last year she got pregnant but she lost the baby:( and since then I have the feeling that everything changed.

At the end of January we send the papers for the removal of condition, but right now she went crazy and she doesn't want to support my petition anymore , sending an affidavit trying to say that I married her for the wrong reason.

I want to know what should I expect right now, what should I do next. How can she say something like this when we bought a car, a house and she was pregnant too?

I would suggest you have her go to a doctor check her hormones. Women have what is know as post postpartum depression after having a child. You have two strikes first this can happen when you had a healthy child and second you have the loss which compounds your problems. It look like you need some time to work this out. If she would agree to see a doctor and consular this will be both of you. Then you could stop this affidavit and put a time limit this has to be done. This way you both will know when this will end or is fixed.

[marian79 0]

We already went to see a marrige counselor, but it didn't work. Things are not the same between us anymore.

Now I am concerned that I will not be able to get my 10y GC because of the petition that she sent.

[Christi85 86]

Allow me to play devil's advocate.

I totally understand the pain that a miscarriage can bring, I understand the combination of crazy hormones and sorrow from the loss and how in many cases it can bring a couple's previously happy relationship upside down. I even understand that in some cases, an event like that might even destroy a couple's relationship. My guess is one of two:

1) With all due respect, I wonder if there are things you are not telling us. It's one thing for a wife to go crazy after a painful circumstance, take it out on her husband or even consider divorce on some occasions if things between the couple get too bad. But even so, it's a big stretch to accuse you that you married her to take advantage of her for immigration benefits, even more so to go as far as write USCIS about it, accusing you of fraud. I wonder if she has deeper reasons to believe that you married her to use her.

2) If the above is not true, it could be that your attitude was so focused on obtaining the permanent green card when you were suffering such a big blow as a family, that it made her believe it was all you cared about, and thus she drew the conclusion that you married her for the wrong reasons.

Now on to your question about the 10 year green card:

Her sending a letter to USCIS is very bad for your case. USCIS is likely to believe her and at the very least grill you before they decide to approve you. I also think you should expect an interview and you may have to change your petition status from joint to waiver. Going forward, a good immigration attorney is probably required, in order to help you navigate the procedure and have a fair chance. It is to your benefit that you can present joint ownership and financial responsibilities - this will help you show that the marriage was entered in good faith. Her past pregnancy, even though it ended badly, could also be proof of a valid marriage.

As to your relationship with your wife, I really hope you can sort things out between the two of you. If not, you should consider filing for divorce and moving forward. All the best!

[Sandra G. 5,048]

Get divorced and file for I-751 waiver, her letter won't affect your I-751 if you have enough proof of bonafide marriage, and it seems you have enough proof.

Edited April 12, 2013 by sandranj

[Jawaree 717]

Some couples that goes thru a miscarriage sometimes pulls apart as there are many unspoken blames and feeling of being

blamed, if the marriage was bonafied ...underlying love should still be there...how long were you in counseling? Are you

more focused on your status than the baby, have you tried asking her what changed...and what changed for you?....Did you

do something and you are not telling here? some women cannot forgive after infidelity and gets spiteful. Cant see why she

would say you used her for GC because you all lost a baby...best wishes on your journey.