Combating loneliness and homesickness in an immigrating spouse

[AKSinghSingh79 143]

I'm concerned about my husband's initial period of transition after arriving in the U.S. Chances are its going to take some time to get a job and he will be faced with lots of alone time in our apartment while I'm out working.

I'd imagine it's going to be a depressing and lonely stage for him to go through. I don't want him to get discouraged and let the homesickness overwhelm him.

Why can I do to make his transition period more tolerable and less depressing? I've come up with a few ideas such as attending driver's ed courses.

Any other suggestions are appreciated!

[Caryh 5,206]

I did everything I could do to be there for my wife. Going home for lunch every day, helped to break up her day. She had the ability to contact home any time she wanted, but contacting home just seemed to make the homesickness worse. Finding ways to keep her busy was the biggest thing. If the immigrant spouse can keep their mind occupied, there's less time to turn to thinking about the things they miss. Once she got her EAD, and a little before, she started seriously spending her days on the internet looking for work. I told her it was her job now, to spend her days looking for work. Once she was working, that was a big plus for her. Didn't solve homesickness, just left her with less time to dwell on it. Only time will get rid of homesickness.

I used to take her to the mall and drop her off for the day to. Usually when I came home for lunch, she'd have a bag lunch ready and off we went to mall near my office. After work I'd pick her up later. I'm not sure what your husband is into, But if you can bring him to a part of town where he can explore his own interests, it will do good to both help him feel he can learn on his own and occupy his mind for a bit.

I remember the first job interview my wife went on downtown. She was determined to take the bus back to the mall near my office. There are essentially no buses near our home. I was scared the entire time for her, but I could monitor how she was getting around with the Find My Phone app on our iPhones. She took probably the worst bus route she could have taken, but she did it all on her own and got to the mall just fine. Once she started working, that experience really helped, as I would drop her off in the morning, then she'd take public transportation back to the mall, and get there just in time for me to pick her up. Then of course it was prepping and getting a drivers license and car. Even when she had both of those, it was a few weeks until she felt ready to drive the way herself.

Mostly, your spouse is going to have to find their own methods to deal with the boredom and homesickness. You can do your best to give options, but you're not going to be able to keep them busy all the time or from getting homesick. To this day my wife laughs about how bad she wanted to start working, and now she just wants some time off.

[Redwings 0]

Get subscription to a few channels like Netflix, Vudu etc if you are animal lover then have dogs and cats. Play with dogs, go for a walk with dogs, play with cats, go for shopping(within walkable distance), Its amazing here in the USA as they have big malls for dogs and cats so go shopping for animals, cook, exercise, play on wee or Xbox etc, call your usa relatives/friends for get together, take classes in nearby college or online, find communities online and join them as they will have good plans and you can also make friends, goto nearby spiritual or animal societies and do voluntary service(they will be so happy), read books, read about USA news and keep updated as it helps for citizenship in future and also it helps you to involve in discussions with everyone. Make your neighbors try indian food. Get driving lessons and for couple of months in the beginning just learn driving by your wife and its going to be fun. Travel within USA. :dance:

I just told whatever I am doing I know these are small things but these are the things can make you happy.

[Redwings 0]

Get subscription to a few channels like Netflix, Vudu etc if you are animal lover then have dogs and cats. Play with dogs, go for a walk with dogs, play with cats, go for shopping(within walkable distance), Its amazing here in the USA as they have big malls for dogs and cats so go shopping for animals, cook, exercise, play on wee or Xbox etc, call your usa relatives/friends for get together, take classes in nearby college or online, find communities online and join them as they will have good plans and you can also make friends, goto nearby spiritual or animal societies and do voluntary service(they will be so happy), read books, read about USA news and keep updated as it helps for citizenship in future and also it helps you to involve in discussions with everyone. Make your neighbors try indian food. Get driving lessons and for couple of months in the beginning just learn driving by your wife and its going to be fun. Travel within USA. :dance:

I just told whatever I am doing I know these are small things but these are the things can make you happy.

Also have Vonage phone service so that you can talk to indian relatives unlimited