Marriage and GC problems

[Done--Really 331]

Yes Valerie !!!

I will be more careful with my wording since all I am really doing is telling stories, not making recommendations

[Labirint 0]

Hello, guys!

Thank you all for being so kind to us. I am very touched (even cried a little). (F)

Let me explain some more about us and our situation to clear the picture.

My fiance does not just sit home for 3 years and do nothing. He tries his best to make some money working part time for cash to provide for us. But his income is really tiny.

We don't want to sit on taxpayer's neck. We have enough to pay our bills and don't want to apply for any assistance from state or county.

Population of our city is just few thousands of people. It is really hard to find jobs here but he keeps trying.

I didn't work here illegally. I try not to do anything stupid (I have already done enough).

Yesterday I googled the statutes of our state and found out that SSN is not required if you don't have it. I just have to sign a certain paper. I saw you guys already gave me this information on previous pages. Thank you very much.

Sorry for answering to all of you at once. I am not very familiar with how to do the quotation. Never been on forums before.

We have some good news, by the way! My fiance has got a job offer. We both are so exited! Hope everything is gonna be fine (keep our fingers crossed).

Right now we can not move out of state (for financial reasons) but hopefully we will be able to do it in a near future.

We have decided to save money for my paperwork first, then go ahead and get married and right after that submit the docs for AOS. Until than I don't want to run around the town and put myself at jeopardy of being deported. Maybe I am way too careful or paranoid. But as they say "Better safe than sorry".

I will keep you updated on our situation. It's really great to have so much support! You guys are sooooo awesome! I have got so many good advises. What would I do without you. (F) God bless you, guys!

P.S. And thanks for the advice about sending all forms together. I did not know that it makes such a big difference. I really appreciate that comment.

magical, thank you for the web-link. I'll check it out right now.

Edited February 25, 2013 by Labirint

[Labirint 0]

yours is the best advice yet.

OP can relate to my story also. (Except my wife and I didn't know each other when she came to the US).

SteveAndTiff, where to find your story? Where should I click? (sorry, I am really dumb at this kind of things )

Edited February 25, 2013 by Labirint

[Labirint 0]

Yes Valerie !!!

I will be more careful with my wording since all I am really doing is telling stories, not making recommendations

magical, I can not reply on your PM. It says: "You cannot reply". I am not sure why. Maybe I have to have certain amount of messages on forum first?

Thank you for your kind words. God bless you.

Edited February 25, 2013 by Labirint

[Done--Really 331]

Consider getting married sooner, and then you can wait to file until you have more $$. Once married, you can get a joint bank account, both married names on lease, joint names on utility bills, etc, etc, all of which will be handy later when you start through the USCIS process. Also get your birth certificate so you don't have to do that at the last minute. Not knowing where you were born, I can't give specific advice, but be sure you follow exactly what USCIS requires--watch for things like long form versus short form, and anything else that is in the directions

And above all...just follow the directions--REALLY !!

This is not hard, and if you do everything that the governement wants, it is a piece of cake. Don't spend any energy at all trying to out think the regulations--they are what they are, so make them your friend and everything will be smooth--of course you still have to deal with the financial issues, and I assume you will find a way to handle that.

You are on the road, and while there may be a few speedbumps, the journey will be great in the end--just watch out for those who have strong opinions not backed up by facts--stick to the rules only and you will be smiling--a lot !!

Edited February 25, 2013 by magical

[ValerieA 350]

OP, magical has given you some good advice - get married ASAP and start collecting the documents you need for AOS. On the very very slight chance that you come to the attention of immigration officers and they attempt to deport you, it would not look good if you got married while in deportation proceedings - they could assume you only got married to avoid deportation. I sincerely doubt that you will come to their attention, but better safe than sorry.

Good luck! You'll be fine. AOS is simple and fast once started, although slightly expensive.

[Gosia & Tito 199]

<br /><br /><br />

I'll defer to those of you with practical experience in this matter - As I said before, I'd love to be wrong - I have been relying on what USCIS and IRS websites say on the subject - Good luck to the OP and her fiancee -

Same here, we married in Colorado, no SSN needed and on top, the couple can marry themselves -as we did-!! All the county wants to see is some government id (passport from another country qualifies) that proves you are who you say you are.

[SAT 9,609]

1361754084[/url]' post='6001980']

SteveAndTiff, where to find your story? Where should I click? (sorry, I am really dumb at this kind of things )

Click on my name, then my timeline

[Labirint 0]

Consider getting married sooner, and then you can wait to file until you have more $$. Once married, you can get a joint bank account, both married names on lease, joint names on utility bills, etc, etc, all of which will be handy later when you start through the USCIS process. Also get your birth certificate so you don't have to do that at the last minute. Not knowing where you were born, I can't give specific advice, but be sure you follow exactly what USCIS requires--watch for things like long form versus short form, and anything else that is in the directions

And above all...just follow the directions--REALLY !!

This is not hard, and if you do everything that the governement wants, it is a piece of cake. Don't spend any energy at all trying to out think the regulations--they are what they are, so make them your friend and everything will be smooth--of course you still have to deal with the financial issues, and I assume you will find a way to handle that.

You are on the road, and while there may be a few speedbumps, the journey will be great in the end--just watch out for those who have strong opinions not backed up by facts--stick to the rules only and you will be smiling--a lot !!

:) Thank you, miracle. I have my birth certificate translated. Also I have a all forms printed out. I went through all instructions and made a drafts (filled the forms out, correct all mistakes). After we submit these papers along with other required forms, I will do the medical exam. I can not do it sooner, because the closest doctor approved by USCIS is 50-60 miles from us. Don't want to take a risk going there without having NOA on hands.

I believe everything will be ok.

I also read a story on some website about a married couple who could not find a sponsor.

Her husband sent his tax return (which didn't look very good cause he had no job last year), but he's got a new job (after tax period) and sent pay slips for last few months and USCIS has accepted it! WOW!

I don't know if it happens all the time or those guys just got lucky? Hope it might work in our case as well if we will not find sponsors. I hope for the best. At least if that option worked for somebody it might work for us too!

[Done--Really 331]

Current income is what matters, but if there was little or no income in the recent past, or he has only been employed for a couple of months, they might still ask for a co sponsor. In this case, a letter from the employer along with paystubs can tip the scales in your favor.

[Labirint 0]

OP, magical has given you some good advice - get married ASAP and start collecting the documents you need for AOS. On the very very slight chance that you come to the attention of immigration officers and they attempt to deport you, it would not look good if you got married while in deportation proceedings - they could assume you only got married to avoid deportation. I sincerely doubt that you will come to their attention, but better safe than sorry.

Good luck! You'll be fine. AOS is simple and fast once started, although slightly expensive.

Thnks you, ValerieA for your support. I am wondering if they could look at my visa and ask about my overstay? (while we file for marriage licence) This is a very small town. People around here love to find out more about other people's lives and discuss that with others. That's why we have hard time deciding if we should get married next week or wait until we have money to pay for AOS forms and to everything pretty much together - within 2-3 days

P.S. I almost never leave the house for reasons I mentioned above.

Edited February 25, 2013 by Labirint

[Labirint 0]

Click on my name, then my timeline

I've got it. Thank you.

Current income is what matters, but if there was little or no income in the recent past, or he has only been employed for a couple of months, they might still ask for a co sponsor. In this case, a letter from the employer along with paystubs can tip the scales in your favor.

That's a great news! Thank you very much! In our case every option counts.

[Boggy1974 124]

Until than I don't want to run around the town and put myself at jeopardy of being deported. Maybe I am way too careful or paranoid. But as they say "Better safe than sorry".

You have been given a lot of great advice of how to proceed earlier. You can't 'lock yourself up' in your house for fear of venturing out to the courthouse to get married.

Please go get married, apply for AOS and continue on from there. Great news your fiance has received a job offer!

[VanessaTony 3,567]

We have decided to save money for my paperwork first, then go ahead and get married and right after that submit the docs for AOS. Until than I don't want to run around the town and put myself at jeopardy of being deported. Maybe I am way too careful or paranoid. But as they say "Better safe than sorry".

Do NOT wait to get married. If you are married and run into ICE they will give you the chance to AOS as the spouse of a USC. If you are NOT married they will deport you. Quickie court wedding should not put you in danger because regular police/sheriff's etc aren't allowed to ask about your status. So go to the court house with your passport as ID and whatever else you need (that you find out by calling, not from their website) and get married.

[AnotherLostSoul 167]

Hey Victor--this isn't an debating contest--this is the real world with real problems and real solutions.

we don't know their personal situation, but if they are in an area like my home town, they are screwed...period. But if they relocate to a better area, they can find work if they are willing to start at the bottom rung and work their way up...no contradiction in that.

yes, I know a lot of people here in NJ with no papers, and yes, I have helped in many ways over the last ten yeas or so when I first moved here, and what I am amazed by is that they risk deportation every day, and yet work hard and well to make a few bucks so they can get to the next level, not to mention sending substantial $$ home. One of the fellows I mentiond with the car service has lived away from his family for twenty years--think about it--twentry years--and he lives in a one room apartment, sending $$ back to his family in Honduras where a couple of his kids have graduated from college, with one more to go, and then I think he will go home with a nice nestegg and tremendous pride that he was able to change the direction of his kids lives, and keeping his family intact. Pride. Real pride.

If the OP and her hubbie will do the same--and why not--they will be taking the first steps to change their lives as well.

Victor, I am ashamed that you are being so discouraging when solutions are everywhere, and they don't need $$ to relocate. You think these folks in my area--mostly form Central America--came here with $1000 in their pocket?? Think again.

They are the brave ones. They are the ones who have given up their comfort zone to change the direction of ther families--particualry their kids--forever.

@Magical: I have to agree with you by far. I was 12 when my dad died, and then 16 when my Mom died. We were poor, my Mom was doing occasional house cleaning to make sure me and my siblings have food on the table, and we lived in a small apartment, all siblings in one room (regardless of gender- my Mom just didn't tell the office people so they don't make a fuss). When Mom died, we realized that even though we're still young, we have to survive somehow. My brother was already 18 so he was our guardian, with of course, no savings account. So, we realized things are going to turn pretty bad, and us, kids, will have to go to foster home if he cannot support us. So, guess what? Like you said, we started from the bottom. We moved, and begged friends to stay separately it their place for a couple months until we can save up some money to live together again with being able to rent an apartment. And as you said, I did house cleaning in the evenings after school, I did baby sitting at the weekends. I would see some small job options, and same with my other siblings, and my brother too. He became a mail man, so that he can get a bit more payment as he did not have to go to school anymore. We, from all these small jobs, made it in a way that we moved in all together into a one bedroom apartment. Yes, slept on the carpet (thank god they have carpets in the apartments!!!) because we just didn't have the money to buy 4 air mattress. We went to the thrift store, we bought our blankets there, one under ourselves (to serve as a mattress) and one above us (for cover). We did tons of dumpster diving, fished out most of our kitchen utensils, pots, and even some furniture. We never did any illegal job, so people here who read this don't freak out saying that I'm supporting illegal work. No, I don't. And we did not do it either. We collected plastic bottles from the dumpsters, and with a shopping cart pushed them all home, and took them back to get money. Like you say, Magical, when someone is desperate, they can achieve great things. Yes, we never lived in a beautiful apartment, with separate rooms, but we made it! And, when I turned 19 my brother has died also (osteosarcoma- before anyone thinks something bad, like drugs as no, none of us ever did anything like that!). Anyway, long story short, we had on less person in our family, yet, that meant we had to work even harder. But we never gave up! Ever! And I wanted to go to college, and was able to win a good scholarship to cover my tuition. There was one criteria: GPA had to be maintained to 3.8 or above otherwise I would lose the scholarship. I worked hard next to school, and studied my butt off, but maintained a 4.0 GPA all four years (I hope at least, I have one more quarter to go), and hence I applied to PhD (skipping Master's program, hoping to having to pay less money for less periods of time) and guess what? I've got accepted to PhD with full scholarship again, tuition and health insurance paid! And I will start in Fall, but also have already applied for a paid internship in South San Fransisco at Onyx Pharmaceuticals...and the meantime, I'm completing my studies to get my degree, and working. My siblings are also working, and one of them just got a full scholarship opportunity for Master's from Fall (she's my twin- I'm a twin) and my younger sister is just going to start undergrad this next Fall. Now, I'm writing all these down, not to brag, or boast and show everyone "how great" I am, but to show, that yes, you can do it if you want to! It sucks major, and you have to start from the shittiest job. Don't think any of us enjoyed going to other people's houses to clean their house, their toilet, or mow the freaking lawn when its 110F outside over summer, or fixing sprinklers, or blowing leaves. They suck! And going through the dumpsters in the dark at night, all that smell of rotting foods and all that. None of them are fun at all! But you've gotta do what you've gotta do, and you have to start somewhere. I have a hard time believing that the boyfriend could not get any type of jobs for three whole years. If we were like that, we would've ended up in foster home, then get kicked out at age 18 and then become drug dealers, or rob into people's car, or even mug people. We all have a choice of how we want to go and carry on with our lives. Our brother loved us, we loved him, and we decided to stick together and help each other. It was out of the question what "we wanted to do"...it was the question "what we MUST do to survive in this world". And we did it (so far. LOL) So, I agree with you Miracle, there's no such a thing as no job. Just have to seek it instead of waiting for it to knock on your door (if you have a door).

Anyway, sorry for the ramble, folks. Just couldn't hold it back reading all these...All the best everyone (including the OP)!