Filing K-1 and Visitation situation (Please help!)

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So I'm screwed no matter what I try to do..

[Ismail+Cassie 36]

So I'm screwed no matter what I try to do..

I dont understand why do you have to tell them now? Just have him come stay with you in the states if he can for 6 months..that will help a lot. Then have him go back to his parents. Dont tell them til you have the visa! What if you dnt get the visa( i hope you do) and u told his parents before that then they kicked him out..what would he do then? Why do they have to know now? And yes, no matter what there will be time apart. Just be grateful you can see him. My fiance cant come to the us to visit AT ALL. I cant take off a month of work and spend more then 1,000 dollars just for a ticket to go see him now either and probably not til he gets his visa. Your lucky you can go visit and can just stay for a few weeks at a time and he can come visit you )

Edited February 18, 2013 by Ismail+Cassie

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I dont understand why do you have to tell them now? Just have him come stay with you in the states if he can for 6 months..that will help a lot. Then have him go back to his parents. Dont tell them til you have the visa! What if you dnt get the visa( i hope you do) and u told his parents before that then they kicked him out..what would he do then? Why do they have to know now? And yes, no matter what there will be time apart. Just be grateful you can see him. My fiance cant come to the us to visit AT ALL. I cant take off a month of work and spend more then 1,000 dollars just for a ticket to go see him now either and probably not til he gets his visa. Your lucky you can go visit and can just stay for a few weeks at a time and he can come visit you )

I understand I should be grateful, and I am! It's just extremely frustrating, because the only thing stopping this process is his parents.

We can't just not tell them because they had talked to me about getting PR to stay and move to Canada, but my fiance and I have recently changed our mind on a final decision. So I can't just up and say "Well I'm gonna go ahead and go back home now, also Jeremy is coming to visit for 6 months." Then there's the issue with when we get the interview and the medical stuff. Because me and my family ( A.K.A my father and grandmother probably, because they'll drive me to Canada so I don't get lost, lol >< ) will just show up on the doorstep saying we need to go take Jeremy to a medical exam, then end up dissapearing for over half the day to drive to the city where our interview will be held. His parents are just extremely suspicious, very unreasonable and in no way understanding. Their own marriage is pretty much a failure, so they don't really comprehend the concept of their son actually being in a happy relationship and wanting to pursue that ( hell, we've been together for 6 years! ).

[sara80 17]

Sorry for your fiance's situation, I'm sure everything will work out fine tho. Of course it won't take 6 months from start to end but there is no other way.. what if he goes to the medical himself, so you don't have to appear and say, hey, we are going to the medical for the visa! Surely he doesn't need to say where is going and is allowed out for the entire day?

From when you receive your NOA2, which apparently now takes a good 6 months for sure.. (sadly..) it might take a good 4-6wks to get to NVC, then it needs to get to the consulate in canada, it might take another good 2/3 months before he gets an interview.... can't he stay at some friends perhaps? as a "back-up plan"?

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Sorry for your fiance's situation, I'm sure everything will work out fine tho. Of course it won't take 6 months from start to end but there is no other way.. what if he goes to the medical himself, so you don't have to appear and say, hey, we are going to the medical for the visa! Surely he doesn't need to say where is going and is allowed out for the entire day?

From when you receive your NOA2, which apparently now takes a good 6 months for sure.. (sadly..) it might take a good 4-6wks to get to NVC, then it needs to get to the consulate in canada, it might take another good 2/3 months before he gets an interview.... can't he stay at some friends perhaps? as a "back-up plan"?

Sadly there's absolutely no one else he could stay with. His grandparents MAYBE, but even then I'm not too sure, since they aren't exactly rolling in money.

He can't stay with any friends because they all also live with their parents/relatives, as most are attending college.

[sara80 17]

Sadly there's absolutely no one else he could stay with. His grandparents MAYBE, but even then I'm not too sure, since they aren't exactly rolling in money.

He can't stay with any friends because they all also live with their parents/relatives, as most are attending college.

what about then waiting 2/3 months from filing the k1 before visiting you? That way you might be able to get NOA2 when he's over the states.. although he will still have to go back and some time might pass before he gets an interview date...

You might be worrying too much about his parents? have they said so? if so, maybe they only said that to make him change his mind...

[closedclosedclose 2]

what about then waiting 2/3 months from filing the k1 before visiting you? That way you might be able to get NOA2 when he's over the states.. although he will still have to go back and some time might pass before he gets an interview date...

You might be worrying too much about his parents? have they said so? if so, maybe they only said that to make him change his mind...

That could be an option.

And I'm pretty positive about his parents. He's stopping his current education to go through this process with me ( plans on continuing when he's all set up with me in the states ). So just that will probably cause them to disown him ( exaggerated..kind of ). I mean..you don't understand how UNBELIEVABLE they are. Yesterday his father threw a fit, yelling and cussing at Jeremy because we had eaten something, and put the bowl we ate out of in the sink to soak ( there was some food stuck on ), and he thought we were just putting it in there to dump out in the sink ( their sink doesn't have a garbage disposal, so food can get stuck in the pipes ) So he shouted that we were like living with a bunch of 2 year olds. Poor Jeremy tried explaining about..I don't know, 5 times that we just put it in to soak and loosen up some of the bits. They don't listen, and they don't communicate.

I'm sorry for the rant, but it's just hard to explain how infuriating they can be. And this situation right here just makes it worse, as they're delaying my and my fiance's happiness.

Edited February 18, 2013 by Jeremy&Amanda

[Penguin_ie 5,998]

Waiting a few months into the K1 processing before you move back is a good idea- file now!

Another option, since your fiance stopped his education, would be for him to get a job, and find a room-mate situation for a few months. I would recommend this, because remember there is ni way of knowing exactly how long processing takes, there is the interval between medical and interview to consider, and he won;t get the visa at interview- they will keep his passport to put the visa in, and he will get it back in the post a couple of weeks later.

[*Snowdrop* 604]

Waiting a few months into the K1 processing before you move back is a good idea- file now!

Another option, since your fiance stopped his education, would be for him to get a job, and find a room-mate situation for a few months. I would recommend this, because remember there is ni way of knowing exactly how long processing takes, there is the interval between medical and interview to consider, and he won;t get the visa at interview- they will keep his passport to put the visa in, and he will get it back in the post a couple of weeks later.

I second the getting a job suggestion. Sounds like you may not be getting much help from your fiancé's parents in the near future so it might help for your fiance to get some work experience under his belt and even the chance to save some money to help you guys out in the first years of your marriage together.

[bigdog 377]

Waiting a few months into the K1 processing before you move back is a good idea- file now!

Another option, since your fiance stopped his education, would be for him to get a job, and find a room-mate situation for a few months. I would recommend this, because remember there is ni way of knowing exactly how long processing takes, there is the interval between medical and interview to consider, and he won;t get the visa at interview- they will keep his passport to put the visa in, and he will get it back in the post a couple of weeks later.

:thumbs:A common sense approach is always best.

[Bayareaguy 156]

Also yikes, why is everything going slow?

Depends on where you live. If your application goes to CSC, you my be in for a long wait, unless it picks up again.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/414397-csc-seems-take-longer-to-process/

[fantonledzepp 159]

I'm reading all of this and it seems like you're absolutely sold on the idea of him visiting the states and staying with you for 6 months.

But if this is going to create more problems than you need, then it doesn't seem like the best course. It seems that you live relatively close to each other, why not have him continue his life in Canada and you visit him? I say this because the process is not easy. It is hard. And not just the waiting, some have family problems (such as yours), and some newly-arrived spouses and fiance's get homesick.

If you do proceed with the current course, can you put him in a hotel or apartment (don't know Canada's leasing terms) for the 2-4 months after your fiancé returns from his visit in the states?

[aaron2020 11,651]

Why does a grown man need his parents?

Can't he stay with friends?

Can't he get a job in Canada to support himself?

Seems more reasonable to stay in Canada and find a way to support himself rather than live with his parents IMHO.

Every couple has to deal with the separation. Consider yourself fortunate that he's Canadian and can visit you during the K-1 process.

It extremely unlikely the process will be completed in 6 months. It will be impossible to extend his visit with a pending K-1. You can count on him spending several months in Canada during the process if you do not intend for him to overstay on his visit.

Edited February 18, 2013 by aaron2020

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Why does a grown man need his parents?

Can't he stay with friends?

Can't he get a job in Canada to support himself?

Seems more reasonable to stay in Canada and find a way to support himself rather than live with his parents IMHO.

Every couple has to deal with the separation. Consider yourself fortunate that he's Canadian and can visit you during the K-1 process.

It extremely unlikely the process will be completed in 6 months. It will be impossible to extend his visit with a pending K-1. You can count on him spending several months in Canada during the process if you do not intend for him to overstay on his visit.

He needs his parents because he has no where else to stay currently.

All of his friends also live with parents ( except for one who's gone off to the join air force ) while they attend college.

The town we're in is extremely small, so job positions are pretty much a no go unless you know somebody. He's probably applied to every place in town.

But we both had a very long talk about it and we've finally figured out a course of action to take. I'll start my timeline once I've mailed my K-1. Thank you all for the help <3

[JnJ13 13]

In addition to things that others have said about timelines- Where does he live? You also have to add time on for the interview which can be MONTHS from your NOA2 in Montreal or a bit less in Vancouver but Montreal has known to be slow and it is hard to really plan for that until you actually have you NOA2.. Something else to consider as if he is going to be interviewing in Montreal I would add some extra time on!

A job might be a good idea because that is a long wait if he stopped school too!

Also- he does need somewhere he can have mail sent to from Montreal (ie. his parents house or an apartment).