The Rant

[TBoneTX 45,077]

reduced my wardrobe to shorts and tank tops

Fotos or it isn't happening, no man.

"That wouldn't look good on you. Your arms are too chubby."

How to know when you've been married a long time, or too long:

Esposa: Honey, does this dress make me look fat, huh man?

Esposo: No, Dear; the dress doesn't make you look fat. You ARE fat, si man!"

it's often used as a pet name between couples - "gordo/a") [...] when is calling your wife (or any woman, really) "chubby" a good idea?

Our cat's formal name is Mofle (have you, or has your esposo, heard that; and, if so, what does it mean to you?) -- apparently a regionally obscure Ecuadorian term. In casual conversation, we call her La Gorda (the fattie): "Did you forget to let Gorda in from the back yard AGAIN?"

As if on cue, Mofle/La Gorda has just jumped on my lap and is interfering with the typing by nuzzling my hands, miu man. I still miss my old cat desperately (gone now 9 months 15 days), but Moflita is very sweet, si man.

[TBoneTX 45,077]

You mean to the capital? Well I guess they could be considered roads... they've been cleared of forest vegetation, anyway. I don't think they're THAT bad

Rant of agreement: The potholes of which Ecu roads are rife are large enough to swallow smaller South American countries, ufff man.

Mini-scenario:

On my first trip to Ecu, we were being chauffeured from Cuenca down southeastward by Gato, a friend of Mrs. T-B.'s who does taxi/limo work. Mrs. T-B.-to-be and her #5 sister were along for the ride. The first pothole we hit, I thought distinctly, "There goes 9 years of back therapy, si man." I was death-gripping the armrest with left hand and the hanging strap with right hand the entire way, which was 5 hours of pitching & bucking & rocking & rolling... and Mrs. T-B.-to-be and her sister slept almost the whole way, sigh man.

In that case, I'm not sure if there's a way to drive the whole distance. I'd imagine there'd be some kind of combination of roads you could take, however treacherous and time consuming it may be. I wouldn't be willing to find out for my husband's dog, though.

One word, in regard to the non-poochport: Coyote, si man.

[TBoneTX 45,077]

We once drove to Peru... That was enough adventure to last a while. No more South American border crossing in a car for me.

Oh, man -- lookee at what you caused me to advance-search for, see man:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/214172-humor-trip-to-ecuador-peru/

This trip was chauffeured by the aforementioned Gato (so-called because he has green eyes like a cat, or gato). I still remember the turkey walking down the center of the main street in that Peruvian hamlet, gee man.

[TBoneTX 45,077]

My husband just grabbed my butt and threw out my back. How the heck does that happen?

It's a matter of technique, si man:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/249659-wedgies-si-man/

What's the word for "wedgie" in Danish, huh man?

[TBoneTX 45,077]

Ecuador's also in the same time zone as the east coast, which makes it easy when calling my family - no messy time conversions and whatnot.

This was always the boon of hunt-spousing southward vs. eastward/westward, si man. I hang out in the RUB regional forum, and the guys there are uniformly jealous of the no-more-than-one-hour-time-difference reality (not to mention the world's-longest-hyphenated-compound-adjective usage, see man). Interestingly, the flights from Houston to Guayaquil or Quito were only about an hour longer than it would have been to fly from Houston to Seattle, gee man.

[TBoneTX 45,077]

I have a degree in Equine Science, majoring in Western Horsemanship.

A dude in the RUB forum is working toward a PhD in Moose Ecology, si man (I kid you not, no man).

[TBoneTX 45,077]

The last thing I wanted was a wife when I met my wife

1. Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same thing.

2. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock.

3. Why do most husbands die first? They WANT to, si man!

Edited February 24, 2013 by TBoneTX

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

It's funny how life works out. It's good that you ended up meeting your wife here. As did I. The last thing I wanted was a wife when I met my wife lol...

They always come when you least expect/want them. I was happy having a bed all to myself and only one messy person in the house....and the last thing I wanted was another Scandinavian.

A rant directed at the Dane who thought it was a good idea to buy a full bed. It is not big enough for two people. Oh, and the futon mattress is absolutely awful. Why a person would buy a futon mattress for a bed is besides me. I find the floor more comfortable.

[B & G 200]

Rant of the day... It is a beautiful 65F degrees out, sunny, with beautiful blue skies and I want to be doing what most of the Greek population is doing right now... sit at a cafe and drink a cup of coffee for the next 3 hours!!! But no.. I am stuck at work.. and once again the supervisor is MIA...

[SAT 9,609]

what most of the Greek population is doing right now... sit at a cafe and drink a cup of coffee for the next 3 hours!!!

That's why Greece is in a world of hurt right now...

Here goes Mary with the machine gun texts again.......

Baby is 10 lbs 5 oz. fat little sucker...

1. Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same thing.

2. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock.

3. Why do most husbands die first? They WANT to, si man!

A dude in the RUB forum is working toward a PhD in Moose Ecology, si man (I kid you not, no man).

what's the RUB forum?

[SAT 9,609]

with which part of the military did you serve?

I hate when people make their non-stick pans all sticky... Like when they use metal utensils. UGH! WHY?! Or when they're like "teflon is the devil" (aka water boy's mom) but haven't done any real research into it. Actually that just bugs me period... When people just believe every GD email they ever get. My mom sent me one once and she was like, eat fruit before this because the stomach uses different acids to digest and it'll ferment... blah blah blah.. dr oz says so.. My sister and I literally freaked out on her. My sister is an RN and I loved two classes in high school - biology and art. We set her straight and bascially said "you're a smart woman, don't be so darn gullible."

Marines.

I think it was the heat that got my teflon pan.....

[B & G 200]

That's why Greece is in a world of hurt right now...

Here goes Mary with the machine gun texts again.......

Baby is 10 lbs 5 oz. fat little sucker...

what's the RUB forum?

I think it stands for Russian-Ukraine-Belarus.. or just all the eastern europe block..

And trust me.. Greece isnt hurting cuz we drink a cup of coffee for hours..

And congrats to Mary and the baby.. hopefully now her hands will be too full to text!

Edited February 24, 2013 by geena

[SAT 9,609]

I think it stands for Russian-Ukraine-Belarus.. or just all the eastern europe block..

And trust me.. Greece isnt hurting cuz we drink a cup of coffee for hours..

And congrats to Mary and the baby.. hopefully now her hands will be too full to text!

No...i woke up to about a dozen texts lol.......

[SAT 9,609]

I've never been there, but I am an ocean lover. I think the Dane might melt though (I think you meant C?). He's not ready for temps above 80F.

he might have a hard time with those hot and humid summers we get here.

[The Mean Lady 604]

They always come when you least expect/want them. I was happy having a bed all to myself and only one messy person in the house....and the last thing I wanted was another Scandinavian.

A rant directed at the Dane who thought it was a good idea to buy a full bed. It is not big enough for two people. Oh, and the futon mattress is absolutely awful. Why a person would buy a futon mattress for a bed is besides me. I find the floor more comfortable.

My husband was not interested in a girlfriend at all at the time.

And re:beds. A full is plenty big enough for us.

HOWEVER, it's the damn cat that pretends it's an entire person that has made me think we NEED a queen.