Addressing possible red flags in i-130 -- EGYPT

[DarwishAE 19]

Everyone here answers the way they do because they all a "remember so and so???" story. I doubt there is a person that comes here thinking there is something wrong with their relationship. It would be absurd.

My advice and thoughts comes not from this forum, just because I have a group of friends who are intercultural marriages, and a number of them re/con-verts. If you already covered all the bases that I mentioned then you are off to a great start. These are all things that I know have been concerns and sometimes problems for them.

You really don't want to run off from this forum. It is a really invaluable resource. Take the good. Leave the bad, and assume most of us have the best of intentions.

Do you think it would be wise for us to wait to file? We are trying to plan a trip for me to come to Egypt in the summerm. By next school year I should be able to get a job as a nursing assistant as long as next quarter goes fine and I will be better prepared financially. It would also give him more time to save up some of his own money. He is a man of faith and I'm more of a realist which will make discussing this a tad difficult. There are times where turning it all over to god isn't the best option, you also have to put in some work before relying on faith. I think the best point from this post is that waiting wouldn't hurt. Except for even more time apart, which won't kill us.

[zahrasalem 114]

It never hurts to take the extra time. Try to get more visits to Egypt in, spend time being married and establishing your love and relationship together. It's not always easy to have a long distance relationship, most of us here have had to go through it for several months (our wait was 10 months from filing to visa in hand) to a couple of years. It's worth it in the end when he's finally here with you!!

When you are ready to do all the paperwork, we can help you figure it all out.....best wishes

Edited February 17, 2013 by zahrasalem

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

Do you think it would be wise for us to wait to file? We are trying to plan a trip for me to come to Egypt in the summerm. By next school year I should be able to get a job as a nursing assistant as long as next quarter goes fine and I will be better prepared financially. It would also give him more time to save up some of his own money. He is a man of faith and I'm more of a realist which will make discussing this a tad difficult. There are times where turning it all over to god isn't the best option, you also have to put in some work before relying on faith. I think the best point from this post is that waiting wouldn't hurt. Except for even more time apart, which won't kill us.

Considering your overall situation, yes, it might be very wise to wait to file. As you say, it would give you time to be better prepared financially to support an immigrant spouse through the process and after arrival until he gets established.

Also, waiting will give your more time as a couple to build and accumulate more evidence of a bonafide relationship - the additional visits and "real time" spent together, perhaps your family meeting his, the regular communication between the two of you, maybe some mingling of some of your financial assets/obligations, etc. These are the types of evidence that the consulate would regard as more positive and persuasive, and could help you out-weigh the red flags.

[RFQ 110]

Do you think it would be wise for us to wait to file? We are trying to plan a trip for me to come to Egypt in the summerm. By next school year I should be able to get a job as a nursing assistant as long as next quarter goes fine and I will be better prepared financially. It would also give him more time to save up some of his own money. He is a man of faith and I'm more of a realist which will make discussing this a tad difficult. There are times where turning it all over to god isn't the best option, you also have to put in some work before relying on faith. I think the best point from this post is that waiting wouldn't hurt. Except for even more time apart, which won't kill us.

This part I can't give the best advice on because I am still somewhat new in the process., so I prefer someone back me up. The way I understand, and what I did: We filed the I130 which seems to be taking less than 6 months to process if everything is in order. The NVC stage can move more at your pace. There are several tasks to complete and you can draw those out a bit.

On my NVC papers it says:

"If a period of one year passes without contacting the NVC (by email, telephone, or mail), all submitted fees and documents will expire. Upon expiration, the fees and documents would need to be resubmitted in order to continue the immigration process."

Based on that quote and a bit of reading on here, I figure there is plenty of time, and we just need to stay in contact or process some paperwork if we are getting near the 1 year.

Since I had little evidence when I sent my I130, I have been gathering more evidences for the last 9 months, and I sent in a fair amount when I filed the NVC packets. We now have a lot more to present with our file and at the interview. I am all about faith, but we still have to do the leg work and use our brains. I'd rather take my time then have a denial and do it all over again. I haven't been approved. I'm praying it happens. Hopefully I can tell you in 3 months or so if we were successful. I'm positive taking some extra time only hurts the heart but not the immigration process.

Edited February 17, 2013 by RFQ

[DarwishAE 19]

This part I can't give the best advice on because I am still somewhat new in the process., so I prefer someone back me up. The way I understand, and what I did: We filed the I130 which seems to be taking less than 6 months to process if everything is in order. The NVC stage can move more at your pace. There are several tasks to complete and you can draw those out a bit.

On my NVC papers it says:

"If a period of one year passes without contacting the NVC (by email, telephone, or mail), all submitted fees and documents will expire. Upon expiration, the fees and documents would need to be resubmitted in order to continue the immigration process."

Based on that quote and a bit of reading on here, I figure there is plenty of time, and we just need to stay in contact or process some paperwork if we are getting near the 1 year.

Since I had little evidence when I sent my I130, I have been gathering more evidences for the last 9 months, and I sent in a fair amount during when I filed the NVC packets. We now have a lot more to present with our file and at the interview. I am all about faith, but we still have to do the leg work and use our brains. I'd rather take my time then have a denial and do it all over again.

So, we could submit an I-130 and hopefully get that approved but wait on the NVC stage for a little while? That's kind of brilliant. That would work so well in our case. What I want to try and do is go stay in Egypt for about 2 months over the summer. We could get an apartment together and then have a lease with our names and have a lot more face to face time. Would add a lot to

the evidence.

I guess it's time to start a discussion with my husband. I really feel like we should wait. Then we can be better prepared and hopefully outweigh the odds against us.

[Sarah Elle-Même 660]

Oh, sigh! Not my Ahmed! Do you have any idea how many times I've heard this both on and offline?

I was not in any way bashing you personally and if you took my posts as such then it's kind of an indication of your mentality and maturity *it's me against the world* and all that jazz. Been there and done that. Besides, I could have been you. At 18 I went through more cr*p than most people do and yet I still didn't grow from those experiences or appreciate them until my mid twenties. I tumbled headfirst into my fair share of BAD relationships where I was used for various different reasons but at the time I was too blind to see. I WISH someone had sat me down and voiced concern of any kind. But that person never came so I had to learn the hard way and I will be scarred by that both mentally and physically for life. Even my current relationship with the guy who is the great love of my life wasn't so healthy in the beginning (mostly this was my fault, by the way).

Ultimately it doesn't matter what I or any other person on this forum thinks. It matters what the consulate thinks because they hold ALL the power over whether or not your husband gets to come live with you in the US. You posted because you knew already you had red flags, it was in your post title in fact. We advised you on how to proceed. You are most certainly free to do as you choose. Hell, you could file now and see what happens. But if you can't prove you have the proper finances to support him and you and your husband can't prove you have a legitimate relationship then his application is going to be denied. A denial hurts like a ton of bricks. It will be wasted time, money, and tears and you will need to expend much, much more of all of those things when you're ready to try again. Hence the consensus on this thread was that you wait, spend more time over there with him on your breaks, graduate school, then file.

As RFQ said, people on this forum do for the most part have good intentions. It is of no consequence to us whether your marriage works out or not or whether your husband succeeds in getting a visa. We have nothing to gain and yet we dedicate our time on this forum to give advice to those who seek it (usually in a constructive way, sometimes not). This is why you should not take our advice with a grain of salt, even if we tell you something you don't like hearing. We're all at the mercy of a system that is confusing, painfully slow, and sometimes unfair. But our end goals are all the same. Wishing you the best.

[Happytobe 164]

Do you think it would be wise for us to wait to file? We are trying to plan a trip for me to come to Egypt in the summerm. By next school year I should be able to get a job as a nursing assistant as long as next quarter goes fine and I will be better prepared financially. It would also give him more time to save up some of his own money. He is a man of faith and I'm more of a realist which will make discussing this a tad difficult. There are times where turning it all over to god isn't the best option, you also have to put in some work before relying on faith. I think the best point from this post is that waiting wouldn't hurt. Except for even more time apart, which won't kill us.

OP, I have been following this thread all day.... and it was refreshing to see this post from you. I know how some of the posts came across, but for the most part everyone seemed to be trying to get you to "see" from the consulate's eyes. An extended trip over the summer and then filing, I think, would show the consulate that neither one of you was pushing for such a quick immigration. I have read a lot of posts from Egypt filers and your case does have red-flags. Taking the time to build, not only the case, but your relationship, as well, is probably going to be a good thing. That being said, you will probably need a co-sponsor, and it would be better if it was one of your family members. The MENA consulates seem to want to see a long-term sustainable income (other consulates, too, don't get me wrong). I would be scared to submit soon, if I were in your shoes. Read some of the consulate reviews, rather all of the consulate reviews, and go from there, if you haven't already.

Anyway, best wishes to you and your husband! Mine is the optimist, as well... I always have to remind him to be realistic, as well. We have a red-flag or two, as well(I think, anyways).... but that's another story... Have a great night!

[SaharaSunset 165]

. There are times where turning it all over to god isn't the best option, you also have to put in some work before relying on faith. I think the best point from this post is that waiting wouldn't hurt. Except for even more time apart, which won't kill us.

Wise self-advice I also think you should really really really try to make a trip there in the summer happen. I'm sure you want to anyway, but I think it would help your case as well. Plus it will give you lots of memories to store up for those long months apart. And finally, regarding your "red flags"...you are the only one who knows what is between you and your husband...trust your instincts, and listen to them too. I think your instincts about putting in the work before relying on God, do you credit. And to that I would add, love doesn't conquer all when it comes to this visa ordeal...being very very well prepared is what conquers all at the consulates Cheers!

[RFQ 110]

I have everything in my signature--

We met March 8th, married the 9th and didn't have but 2 weeks together, and then we filed the I130 in late April. I really don't think I would have done to well at an interview with only that visit. We had a 2 month summer visit and then another 3 weeks over the winter holiday. I just filed our NVC stuff in January, but our I130 was approved at the end of July. So yes, its possible to draw this out and give you two some more time to really build the relationship and evidence.

Separation sucks but its good to think long term goals. For me, I know I'd have a lot more stress trying to knock out my last bit of nursing school if he arrived too soon anyways (though I'd be so happy to deal with that stress ) Are you in nursing school? If so, I feel your pain.

Edited with the quote I was responding to:

So, we could submit an I-130 and hopefully get that approved but wait on the NVC stage for a little while? That's kind of brilliant. That would work so well in our case. What I want to try and do is go stay in Egypt for about 2 months over the summer. We could get an apartment together and then have a lease with our names and have a lot more face to face time. Would add a lot to

the evidence.

I guess it's time to start a discussion with my husband. I really feel like we should wait. Then we can be better prepared and hopefully outweigh the odds against us.

Edited February 17, 2013 by RFQ

[sandinista! 1,816]

I was pregnant my entire last year of nursing school, four months after my husband arrived and we married. It was...interesting to say the least. It certainly helped make things crazy that first year. Wouldn't advise it anyways.

[DarwishAE 19]

I have everything in my signature--

We met March 8th, married the 9th and didn't have but 2 weeks together, and then we filed the I130 in late April. I really don't think I would have done to well at an interview with only that visit. We had a 2 month summer visit and then another 3 weeks over the winter holiday. I just filed our NVC stuff in January, but our I130 was approved at the end of July. So yes, its possible to draw this out and give you two some more time to really build the relationship and evidence.

Separation sucks but its good to think long term goals. For me, I know I'd have a lot more stress trying to knock out my last bit of nursing school if he arrived too soon anyways (though I'd be so happy to deal with that stress ) Are you in nursing school? If so, I feel your pain.

Edited with the quote I was responding to:

I'm really glad to know you can draw out the process a little longer. So I'm thinking we will do the i-130 but know that even once that is approved we will wait to build our relationship more and gather more evidence.

I really want to do a summer language study in Cairo. Then we could get an apartment together for a month, then spend a week or two in 6 October together. Maybe get two months in if it is possible for him with work and everything.

I'm not in nursing school but have decided that's what I want to go into. I won't really start my focus in nursing until next fall. I just want to get my CNA certification so I can at least get a feel for some of what nursing is and have a job that isn't flipping burgers

[NY_BX 397]

I'm really glad to know you can draw out the process a little longer. So I'm thinking we will do the i-130 but know that even once that is approved we will wait to build our relationship more and gather more evidence.

I really want to do a summer language study in Cairo. Then we could get an apartment together for a month, then spend a week or two in 6 October together. Maybe get two months in if it is possible for him with work and everything.

I'm not in nursing school but have decided that's what I want to go into. I won't really start my focus in nursing until next fall. I just want to get my CNA certification so I can at least get a feel for some of what nursing is and have a job that isn't flipping burgers

Which grants the question, again, do you have someone that will sponsor your husband? This is a costly process in itself- given you will traveling a lot, plus filing fees. Plus, you'll need to show the affidavit of support. This must show you make enough above poverty line for him to be approved. You can gather all the evidence in the world, but if you don't have a penny on your name, he will be denied or- at best- on a lengthy AP until you find a sponsor.

If anything, I also suggest you delay filing until you find a job.

[together4evr 360]

Her parents will co-sponsor him.

[together4evr 360]

The cost of this process is expensive.

The petition fee was 420.00 (I do not know what they are now)

The AOS is 88.00

The ds-230 was 230.00

the new immigrant fee is 165.00

Plus all the cost of mailing stuff to each other

making copies of many things

the visits to Egypt themselves costs in the thousands for me

When he gets here, his food costs money, his car, his car insurance, his clothes, his household utilities, his haircuts, his grooming products (more expensive then the ladies!!) Men from Egypt can be high maintanence. lol

His health insurance.

Remember he cannot be a public charge. So, your parents mightbe expected to pay for any surgery, medications or doctors visits he might need.

[kristen_maroc 126]

I'm glad you are staying. Most people here are genuinely trying to be helpful. It can be a hard pill to swallow, but you will have to know about your potential red flags to go through the process... and be able to address them. It's a lot less harsh to hear it from us now than after spending hundreds or thousands of dollars to get a denial at the consulate.