Prenup agreement discussion

[Steven-n-Gladys 2]

Prenup agreement? My Filipina fiancée flipped out when I brought it up.wont even discuss it now. This throws up a huge red flag as we start visa process.Any thoughts?

[Azsara 110]

Prenup agreement? My Filipina fiancée flipped out when I brought it up.wont even discuss it now. This throws up a huge red flag as we start visa process.Any thoughts?

Yea its an interesting subject. I think it can be offensive to someone because it

a) shows your making preparations in the event it doesnt work out and so showing pessimism towards the marriage and/or person before its even started

b) Suggests you may be testing them to see if they still want to marry you knowing they could walk away with nothing.

On the other hand I totally get the rational side of a prenup where so many marriages end in divorce nowadays ANYTHING could happen, even if you think shes gods gift on earth someone may be unfaithful 10 years down the line or other circumstances we cant imagine.

Also if she loved u that much why would it even matter whether theres a prenup or not.

I kinda get both sides of this. Though Im sure for a Filipina theres some cultural offense to be taken at the idea of a prenup too. Maybe someone from this culture can come along and provide insight in this. Personally if my fiancee asked me for a prenup my first thought would be that he doesnt trust me. Even though I know he does, it just kind of annoys me and we'd need to seriously discuss this.

[together4evr 360]

Maybe it threw up a big Red Flag to her that you do not feel you will stay with her forever. maybe she feels it shows your true intentions

[Azsara 110]

I think her reaction was more of a red flag than his proposing the idea but thats just my opinion

[Tintin and Mike 127]

Also if she loved u that much why would it even matter whether theres a prenup or not.

:thumbs:

[N-o-l-a 7,168]

To me it would be a red flag. I brought it up to my husband when we were thinking of doing the K1 and he said "Sure, why not? We aren't ever going to get divorced anyway."

[LSnBigBear 61]

I agree with others that her reaction is not what anyone would like to hear in this instance. I would ask yourself a few questions before proceeding on. How well do you know her?? How much time have you spent with her? Does she have skills that will enable her to work in the USA and make it in the event down the road your marriage ended? As a lot of us mentioned in other posts pertaining to this topic. No pre-nup is normally granted 100% as written if written just one way with other party not receiving anything. Unless divorce happens within the first year of marriage is the exception. I would step back and take a pause on this to see if she comes around. Filipinas are normally reactionary people and are quick to think the worst (i/e you are considering a divorce topic) and become upset. Let it settle down for a bit and then discuss it again more opennly. If her pattern continues you may see a side you do not like and then your answer is there to make the decision to continue.

I know when I have discussed plans for my death as I am 23 years older than my fiancee she just closes up and yells at me not to discuss me dying. I just waited her out so she understood my life insurance etc. She still dispises addressing this so maybe on your fiancee's side it is just her way of reacting similar to mine and death. How is that for circling the wagon

Good luck..

Shawn (Bigbear)

[Sirdaniel42 86]

Also if she loved u that much why would it even matter whether theres a prenup or not.

[sjr09 155]

:thumbs:

[SAT 9,609]

Prenup agreement? My Filipina fiancée flipped out when I brought it up.wont even discuss it now. This throws up a huge red flag as we start visa process.Any thoughts?

Do you have a lot to lose if it doesn't work out? And are you willing to take that kind of a loss?

Like auto insurance, full coverage? Or just liability?

[sjr09 155]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pu8KFlfzk3Y&feature=player_detailpage

[Steven-n-Gladys 2]

I dont have a lot of money at all...I do and did trust her....but like i said a huge red flag to me...especially to not even discuss it....but i have my reasons to think about bringing it up to her...previously married so i have experienced it...and it is worst thing on earth.I know she is taking a big risk to come here with her son ,but im taking a big risk too,and have invested hugely in time,money and emotionally.I know its not an easy topic,but thought it was best to talk with her about it BEFORE starting the visa...prevent...i seriously think it is best of me to disscuss now then when she comes here so she can decide for herself what to do.

[Steven-n-Gladys 2]

Do you have a lot to lose if it doesn't work out? And are you willing to take that kind of a loss?

Like auto insurance, full coverage? Or just liability?

Just time and emotionally...seriously just average wagearner here...maybe a little better than average...like 45k a year...I see it as insurance,u dont buy insurance hoping you will use it...but just in case something does...u have some protection...I was previously married so i know what CAN happen in a divorce..not that it will happen

[Enigma11561 336]

My two cents. If you have deep pockets, and a lot to lose, I would go with a prenup. If you have little in the way of assets, then its a toss up. She should understand that a prenup can actually protect her in that you can write out a specific set of circumstances that gives her financial stability. As an example..going the distance here, Donald Trump with no prenup would have lost half his fortune. With a prenup only about 50 million.If she does not even want to listen, then I would consider thinking about what your future may hold.

[darkangel1215 4]

This is my opinion,

I am Filipina, It is an insult for me if my future husband will tell me that.. It is not our TRADITION or CUSTOM to have a Prenup. My husband and I dont have prenup, When I got here, I work. I assured him if things dont work for us, I would rather send back home. I told him He dont need to worry of me taking of what he owns. Filipina and American Women are different! I assured you that! So dont you worry about it..