For those who got married already.. I need your advice

[haggarda.versoza 3]

Just wondering how did most of you guys got married after your POE to US? Was is it a simple one (civil) or a grand wedding? I just need some input as my fiance's family wished a "real wedding" and somehow, already started planning even though the the K1 hasn't been approved yet.

Since they wanted a "real wedding" of course my parents has to be in the US as well to take part in it, but it's not really practical for us because the flight ticket costs too much. But his family is very traditional want it for their son.

So for those got married as "real wedding" how do you guys go about it? Was one or two of your family members able to fly to US to attend it? If not, how did you go about?

Thank so much in advance!

[danver 15]

Just wondering how did most of you guys got married after your POE to US? Was is it a simple one (civil) or a grand wedding? I just need some input as my fiance's family wished a "real wedding" and somehow, already started planning even though the the K1 hasn't been approved yet.

Since they wanted a "real wedding" of course my parents has to be in the US as well to take part in it, but it's not really practical for us because the flight ticket costs too much. But his family is very traditional want it for their son.

So for those got married as "real wedding" how do you guys go about it? Was one or two of your family members able to fly to US to attend it? If not, how did you go about?

Thank so much in advance!

Every parents wants to see their son/daughter walk down the aisle. It depends on ur financial capacity. Mine was just a simple wedding in a wedding chapel with few close friends.

it is not easy for the bride's parents to come here for just the wedding. they have to get a tourist visa and it is not an easy way.

[haggarda.versoza 3]

Every parents wants to see their son/daughter walk down the aisle. It depends on ur financial capacity. Mine was just a simple wedding in a wedding chapel with few close friends.

it is not easy for the bride's parents to come here for just the wedding. they have to get a tourist visa and it is not an easy way.

Thanks for the input danver. My parents would love to see me to, but they decided to not go the wedding in the US (Financial issue and practicality concern), and I completely understand that.

My concern is, if we're gonna have a 'real wedding' in the US without the presence of the parents aw, if there someone did proxy them?

Anyways, the dates are still far, maybe I will figure something out. But I will appreciate if anyone would share their experience like this. :-D

[redvelvet 12]

Have you discussed with your fiance who is going to pay for the wedding expenses? Because in America, it is the family of the bride who pays for everything. They say that the wedding will be the last gift of the father of the bride to her...

[lovelovelove13 9]

In my opinion, a wedding that consist of two person who love, respect and cherish each other is consider a real wedding. In our traditon ( Pinoys) wedding is one of the most valuable and exciting event in our lives so whatever kind of wedding it is (church, civil or even a secret wedding) as long as you are willing and you know for yourself that you are not hurting anyone then you do not have to worry, yu're going to have a 'real wedding'.

[Tintin and Mike 127]

We had it at the county clerk office and my whole family was there and none of his weren't there (well since I was the petitioner). We had a very intimate, less than 30 people at the reception. We talked about a church wedding in the Philippines but then my side of family will not be there as my sisters have kids now. I was not a big deal for me, we're now married and that's all that matters.

We didn't go for the 'real' wedding as it would cost at least $10k for a decent one. We don't want to start our marriage life broke or with debts.

Good luck!

[PaulAbby 4]

We had a nice outside wedding in USA, 3 weeks after arrival in USA. It was with about 30 family and friends.

One option that we did was to set up Skpe at the wedding so that Mother and Sister (or other family/Friends) from Philippines could watch the wedding live. I know it was not the same as being here, but as everyone knows, there are many problems for family members to make the trip to USA.

They were even in the pictures as we held up the laptop and had pictures of them on the screen to show that they were present even though on the other side of the world. (You may want to warn them so they can be made up and dressed for pictures as it will be very early in the morning!!)

We are still planning on going back to Philippines and having a ceremony there for family and friends (planned for 2015).

[Hank_ 9,174]

We did Skype at our wedding, setup a conference call so all the family and friends all over the world could "attend".

Not sure if we will do a renewal of vows in the Phils later, but for sure there will be a party!

[haggarda.versoza 3]

In my opinion, a wedding that consist of two person who love, respect and cherish each other is consider a real wedding. In our traditon ( Pinoys) wedding is one of the most valuable and exciting event in our lives so whatever kind of wedding it is (church, civil or even a secret wedding) as long as you are willing and you know for yourself that you are not hurting anyone then you do not have to worry, you're going to have a 'real wedding'.

^^ Thanks a lot for that! It enlightened me somehow. ;-)

We had it at the county clerk office and my whole family was there and none of his weren't there (well since I was the petitioner). We had a very intimate, less than 30 people at the reception. We talked about a church wedding in the Philippines but then my side of family will not be there as my sisters have kids now. I was not a big deal for me, we're now married and that's all that matters.

We didn't go for the 'real' wedding as it would cost at least $10k for a decent one. We don't want to start our marriage life broke or with debts.

Good luck!

^^ Thanks a lot for sharing the scenario of your wedding. I really appreciate it. I can now imagine how it goes for us, an alien fiance who cannot bring family to US. I now don't feel alone.

[Caryh 5,206]

Luckily, there is a wedding chapel where we live in the Minnesota so we could set up a real wedding on short notice. We had about 40 people, mostly my friends and family, but a few Filipina that wife met once she got here, and made a video tape of the wedding for her family back home. Her family's internet connection is so poor, skyping doesn't normally work so well and takes a lot of restarting, plus there was no internet at the chapel, so we could not include them that way. We do plan to have our Catholic wedding in the Philippines with her family. We were married by a minister, but her family really wants to see us married in the Catholic church, so we're saving that occasion to spend with them when we return to visit the Philippines. It will probably be close to the same size, as she doesn't have a large family that lives close.

[LSnBigBear 61]

We are either going to have a small ceremony at the courhouse or on the beach. My friend married at the courthouse chapel and siad it was nice. In a year to year and half we will return to Philippines to have a ceremony and of course reception with her family and close friends. If you want your family involved most places have wifi here. Possibly Skype them in to watch and listen. Not the same but it is at least close...

[LoveLife2 5]

What a great post!

We have decided to have a civil marriage just to satisfy the 90 day rule. But, I promised my love a real wedding with the white gown, flowers, family etc very soon after. She does have a 1st cousin her in US. I really like the ideas that have been posted here with Skype but I think I need to ask my girl if she wants her Father to attend. He has not been in her life much but her Momma died in 2008 so I think I should try and offer to get him here for our ceremony. Maybe as he is older now, he might see the value in life to attend such a glorious event. Of course I can provide for all to attend. My Girl is the oldest of 8 children, so I think she may want one of her brothers to attend as that is the family she stays in touch with. It may be hard to get a visa but id he is willing to attend than I'm willing to get him here for the wedding.

[Hank_ 9,174]

If the family is in the Phils getting a tourist visa will be difficult at best.

[YourHumboldtBud 2]

Before I brought my wife here, her family was also concerned about the wedding. The compromise we came up with is that we will have the Non-Church Wedding in the US for those here in America and the Church Wedding in Philippines sometime in the future for the rest of the family that would be unable to attend.

We had a cute Chapel Wedding in Las Vegas which gave our friends and family to have a reason to have minivacation of their own. With less than 30 people the overall cost about $1000 for Ceremony/Reception Dinner. The Wedding Chapel recorded the wedding an it was up for viewing after about 15 minutes after the ceremony.

The cost of throwing a Grand Wedding in PI will be a fraction of the cost of normal wedding here, so my wife and I decided to keep it simple here and spend the real money in PI. considering the US dollar is worth 4-5x as much in the PI a wedding that costs 10K over there would be equivalent to $50-60k here.

For us it was a no-brainer since we get to have 2 weddings 1 for friends and family in US with another for friends and family in PI. We get to go to Vegas and PI(both fun places with good food and many things to keep a couple busy). In the long run the savings in regards to time and money is quite substantial.

[thinkerlove0212 158]

Before I brought my wife here, her family was also concerned about the wedding. The compromise we came up with is that we will have the Non-Church Wedding in the US for those here in America and the Church Wedding in Philippines sometime in the future for the rest of the family that would be unable to attend.

We had a cute Chapel Wedding in Las Vegas which gave our friends and family to have a reason to have minivacation of their own. With less than 30 people the overall cost about $1000 for Ceremony/Reception Dinner. The Wedding Chapel recorded the wedding an it was up for viewing after about 15 minutes after the ceremony.

The cost of throwing a Grand Wedding in PI will be a fraction of the cost of normal wedding here, so my wife and I decided to keep it simple here and spend the real money in PI. considering the US dollar is worth 4-5x as much in the PI a wedding that costs 10K over there would be equivalent to $50-60k here.

For us it was a no-brainer since we get to have 2 weddings 1 for friends and family in US with another for friends and family in PI. We get to go to Vegas and PI(both fun places with good food and many things to keep a couple busy). In the long run the savings in regards to time and money is quite substantial.

Wedding Chapel in vegas. She got to fly and see more of America. We are doing a ceromony when we get back to Phils. Quick cheap easy to get license. Very nice and affordable. Plus no headaches of family and friends to plan a big wedding!